(no subject)
Okay, I wrote this entry this morning in a fit of anger and just made it private because I didn't think anyone would be reading it anyway (its ridiculously long), and honestly I didn't want to piss anyone off with my sweeping generalizations. This is all very obvious stuff that's been said time and time again by almost everyone, but its just been pissing me off lately. I made it public because...well whatever, I just did.
Honestly, I hate that I have been so bored lately and have not hung out with anyone and I have to resort to my goddamn livejournal to say anything anymore. Its pathetic.
I haven't slept all night, for like the 3rd time in the past week. Its my stupid way of attempting to regulate my sleep. After much time spent watching TV (aka the same Maroon 5 video like 10 times) I started getting really pessimistic and cranky. I'm not PMSing which is my cliche normal excuse, this time its just pent up anger. I have honestly tried in the past month to be a nicer, less...aggressive (?) person. Soooo to release this anger I have compiled a mental list of things that I have been thinking about a whole lot tonight and that have just been making smoke come out of my ears and all that. It will definetly be long and I don't expect it to be read, but here it goes.
1) "Scenes" - I hate even this word, sometimes its the only thing to describe what it is, but honestly, i hate this word so much. But "scenes" seem to have plagued the entire city, country, whatever. I used to think it was restricted to "scene" as in boys from Long Island who dye their hair auburn or black and cut it all jagged and listen to Atreyu and shitty grindcore and talking about "edge". BUT NO. I guess its like a really obvious thing to other people, but the fact that I have not been able to escape "scenes" has really just dawned upon me quite recently. Whatever happened to NORMAL people, who didn't attach themselves to stupid intangible things like music and clothes and bullshit stereotypes? Its so hypocritical. A part of me wants to be like (and at times can even successfully do so), "oh whatever, let everyone have their thing, everyone should just be happy and enjoy themselves." And while I do hate to see other people fixate themselves on hating on others and complaining and refusing to just let go and have some fun, and hate it even more when I myself do this, I can't help but HATE seeing people being such pretentious sheep. I wont even bother continuing to write about this any further, as I am sure I cannot put something so apparent into any better words.
2) Yuppies - Okay, this is pretty much an extension of the above, and I guess a lot of the rest of this will end up being one, but whatever. I hate this nu-slew of yuppies who have invaded the Lower East Side, Williamsburg, etc., listen to Franz Ferdinand and the Killers, wear New Balances and Sauconys on their "down time", and have lots of expensive things like iBooks and iPods (because yuppies love their aesthetically pleasing Apple products). They remind me of people who rely on like, Urban Outfitters for trendy clothes constantly. They latch on to the most apparent things of what they consider to be this "underground," "indie" scene. I went through a phase where I thought these yuppies were better somehow. I mean, they have good taste and aren't blatantly ridiculous about it. They have jobs, and are "adults" and not very pretentious or childish. However being on Day 3 of my no sleep stint, and pretty much not seeing anyone ever, leaves me with a lot of free time to read blogs, and remember little things about random people I have met. Yuppies are willing to spend a whole lot of money to live on the outter layers of the "indie scene." They pay a lot of money in rent to live in areas like the Lower East Side and Williamsburg, they spent tons of money on CDs and records (and omg buy record players just so they can listen to actual records), buy lots of clean looking furniture, books, Apple products, nonthreatening and versatile clothing, tickets to shows, drinks at bars, cover at bars, subscriptions to magazines many of which they believe to be obscure and validated by their internationality, like NME, DSL and fancy digital cable. Then they parade it around. Their white headphones for their iPods have become some sort of accessory, they spell Lower East Side, LES, or discretly mention they don't just live in Williamsburg but on BEDFORD AVE. the mecca of yuppiedom. They talk about music and bands and shows a lot (maybe one of the most boring topics of all time), THEY GET BLOGS AND MYSPACES AND FRIENDSTERS, they invite people they just met to their rooftops, they bicycle. My latest hatred is yuppies who update their blogs with pop culture related news constantly. Like things about Britney Spears or the Olsen twins, as if ANYONE actually depended on their blog for such infortmation. And this is all they talk about. Its like everything is a constant game of name dropping. What party you were at, who DJed, what bar, what band, who of the stupid pseudo famous people from the "scene" were there. It's all one big name drop. Like no one will believe you if you didn't incesantly bring it up. Like people have to know this about you. They HAVE to know that you listen to the Rapture and go to Shout and drink 40s. I could make a list of these stupid things yuppies like to name drop just because they name drop it so much. GET OVER IT. It's not like the people you insist on preaching to are living in holes. They're probably into the exact same stupid things as you. And if not, they probably really don't care. Not too get into this again, but I have to since I spoke to him last night and it just got me so angry, but I talked to Tim and remembered why he annoyed me. He insisted giving me a speech on his "reluctant optimist" philosophy. He insisted on explaining how he loves going to shows and walking on the Williamsburg Bridge, and biking around the city, and drinking 40s, and buying RECORDS, and drinking, and living in LES, LEfuckingS. TIM, I DON'T CARE, YOU CAN STOP TELLING ME NOW. Honestly, what makes you think I, or anyone for that matter, should be an element to yours or anyone else's ego. Another example is Andrew. I swear I love Andrew, even though I really only spent like one night with him, and shouldn't be proclaiming love or even talking about him/that anymore... but he was so predictable. I didn't really care at the time, and don't really now, but the first thing we talked about was bands...predictable bands. I mentioned something about Spin, he has to mention he doesn't read Spin, he reads NME. He lives on Ave. B for christs sake. He had a copy of NME lying around on his coffee table. He the whitest, cleanest looking bed, with an equally white and clean looking Mac. He called me a "Rock n Roll kid" and said he was surprised any still existed after we talked about random bands and shows. The point is, Andrew was pretty common and I wouldn't go so far as to say annoying, but just like "ehhhhh" until we stopped talking about bands and started talking about other things. I think I am trying to end this with some sort of moral, like "get into your yuppie" but I'm not. I'm just trying to make a point that that stuff is all just exterior and superficial, and I'm sure they know it, but they invest so much into it.
3) Two Sides of Hypocricy - I feel like such an annoying idiot with a livejournal when I complain about others like this. Not only for the fact that I'm being stuck up and complaining and analyzing to death and refusing to let people have fun, but also because I'm being pretty damn hypocritical. I name drop, I spend a lot of money on clothes and things like my iPod and camera, I listen to those bands. Even worse, and up at the top of my list, I hate when other people brag about drinking or insist on telling you they are/were drunk, but when I'm drunk, what are the first words to come out of my mouth? "I'm drunk" But honestly, I'm over being hypocritical or annoying to others. Sure some things I don't really like about others, and sure those can be the same things I do myself, but I really don't care. I know I'm not very unique, I rarely discover anything on my own. But this stuff is just stupid- music, clothes, who knows who, etc. I don't care about this stuff all that much. It's just entertainment to me. Hopefully it is to other people as well. I would assume so, because the same people I complain about are the people I don't know, so I have nothing better to judge them upon aside from such superficial things.
This entry, as silly as it sounds, has been very good for me to write. I feel like a lot less of an angry person than I was an hour ago (wow!).