A Place To Hide - Part 19
Title: A Place To Hide
Pairing: Emily/Naomi
Rating: Quite a bit of swearing, 'F' and 'C' words so probably R.
Word Count: 2,887
Disclaimer: I don't any of Skins or any of the characters, although i do wish Lily Loveless was mine ;-)
Summary: As i've already mentioned i have decided to take this story into the realms of fiction, as such you can all stop thinking that my life is so interesting lol. But seriously thanks so much if you're still following this, and if you haven't read any of it before then you definitely should because readers and comments make me happy :)
A/N: So this chapter backtracks to cover the Effy chapter, but following Naomi and Emily instead. Any bits of this that are taken directly from 'Effy 2' are in italics.
Emily had sure as hell meant it when she’d said ‘slow’, Naomi thought, they’d talked a lot in the week since she’d uttered those words, but not a lot else had happened. And that was fine with the blonde, well it would have been if it weren’t for the fact that Emily seemed to be a bit distant, seemed to be keeping something from her. But that was fucking ridiculous, right? After all they’d been through, it was downright dumb to think that Ems could be lying to her or betraying her in some way after everything. It must just be her own paranoia, her own fear of commitment. But it sure as hell felt like a lot more than that.
Instead of lessening though, her fears had only increased, her stomach churning with the anxiety of it all, when she’d decided to walk with Ems to college and she’d pointed out that Effy girl. She’d done it with a look in her eye that worried Naomi, a look that said that maybe all wasn’t as right with the world as she’d hoped. Since then Naomi had walked the redhead every day. She did it because she needed to, because with everything going on inside her head she needed to know that she would be on Emily’s mind while she was at college. It was childish and petty and untrusting, but everyday she would kiss Emily long and hard on the steps of the college, ignoring the stares and whispers, just trying to leave some kind of mark, physical or emotional.
“We’re not having sex.” She’d said matter-of-factly to her mum one day, with a slight blush colouring her cheeks. “It’s been four days and we’re not even... we just talk and sleep.”
“Oooh goodness me, four whole days?! How ever are you coping?” Her mum had laughed back, her voice dripping with sarcasm. Naomi had thought that would be it, that she’d overestimated her mother’s skill at giving good advice. But just as Gina was about to leave the kitchen for work, she’d turned back to her daughter and, laying a hand on her shoulder, said gently, “give it time love, just give it time.” And kissed her on the cheek before leaving.
“Right,” Naomi had muttered to herself as her mum gathered her things together.
As Gina stepped out of the front door Naomi had heard her laugh again and say, more to herself than to anyone else “four days... honestly!”
Emily had been having just as much trouble as Naomi, although the blonde seemed not to notice. She didn’t even seem to catch onto the way that Emily’s breath would catch and her eyes stray whenever Naomi stripped off to her underwear and a vest top when they went to bed. It was getting damn near impossible for the redhead to keep her hands to herself, but she knew that they needed to take this slow - just like they’d said - for both their sakes.
She was finding all of this especially difficult seeing as she hadn’t actually been home for more than 5 minutes at a time since this had all started. She knew from what Katie had told her, her voice laced with poison, that her parents were really freaking out but that her sister had grudgingly persuaded them to leave it be for now. For that Emily was monumentally grateful, and it showed her that maybe there was still some hope for the two of them.
It was all going pretty well actually, within a week most of the shit seemed to have settled down, her and Nai were doing better than ever and Katie had come over to talk to her voluntarily a few times. She was happy, and that was something that she hadn’t really been able to say much in her life before. She hadn’t seen Effy much since the night before everything had happened with her and Naomi in spite of her own efforts, the other girl had seemed to dodge her whenever she tried to talk and it was starting to mess with her head a bit.
One morning, before class, she popped to the toilets to sort out her hair - the taste of Naomi’s kiss still on her lips. As she’d leant towards the grimy mirror, analysing her roots, she’d heard the door swing open and shut again. Glancing round she saw Effy standing with her back against the door, and felt her breath catch in her throat. Effy took a step towards the redhead, placing her hand on the edge of a sink that was two along from where Emily was stood. Even at this proximity she could feel Effy’s eyes burning a hole, even in the filthy college toilets she could almost smell the gender neutral odour of Effy’s sheets. The way that Effy looked at her... it was too much.
The silence was stretching on and it was just making things worse, she decided that she would have to say something, anything, to make this just a little less weird and awkward. She turned back to the mirror, she couldn’t look into Effy’s penetrating blue eyes any longer, and opened her mouth to try to diffuse this tension. But before she could say anything Effy had beaten her to it.
“Told her?” Those two words were so smothered in Effy’s usual brand of casual indifference that Emily could almost believe she didn’t care. But lately she’d been able to see through Effy’s charade, been able to see past all the bravado and confidence. Because the truth was with Effy, if she didn’t care she wouldn’t ask. So as nonchalant as she acted, Emily knew that her answer would matter to Effy.
However, as much as she would love to answer Effy’s question honestly, to show her that they were friends and that they could talk about anything, she really didn’t have a fucking clue what the other girl was talking about. Effy rolled her eyes at the redhead, and Emily almost laughed right then because, god, Effy was fucking hilarious when she thought someone was being an idiot. But the laughter was stopped before it could pass through her lips by Effy smirking with anything but laughter lighting her eyes, “Our little wander together into lesbo-land.”
‘Fuck, fuck, fuck.’ Emily’s mind was spinning almost as much as Effy’s. She’d thought that, what with the way Effy had sent her on her way last time they’d been alone together, they would be able to leave what had happened between them in the past. It didn’t seem to her as if Naomi would have to know, it had ended before they had even got together really. If there had ever really been anything to end, it was really nothing between them, just a shag... ‘except it’s never just a shag for you is it?’ she thought, ‘you care too bloody much.’
“No... I d-don’t think she erm... n-needs to know exactly.” She finally managed, after several long seconds of Effy looking at her like they were fucking at that very moment. Fuck, she hadn’t stuttered that much since she was a kid. Guilt was washing over her in long hot waves, she couldn’t figure out when the fuck she’d become the person that cheats on her girlfriend and then says something like that. But, was it really cheating...
Effy’s eyes were all over Emily, she could almost feel them whispering along her skin, there was something going on with Effy today, some lowering of inhibitions and it worried Emily. It was exactly the sort of thing that could lead to the two of them shagging in the filthy college loos. Problem was, now she’d thought about shagging in the loos, it was all she could think about, the only way she could see this conversation ending. While she was trying to get the all-too-graphic images of her and Effy up against the cold white tiles out of her mind, she hadn’t even noticed that Effy had closed the gap between them. Hadn’t noticed, that is until Effy’s hot, wet breaths were hitting her skin and sending a jolt down to her stomach and even lower.
Before she had a chance to stop herself Effy was reaching out and brushing a lock of vibrant red hair from beautiful pale skin, she was running a gentle hand up Emily’s arm and leaving a trail of goosebumps in the wake of her tentative fingers.
“You’re right,” she felt Effy whisper against the sensitive skin at the base of her neck, the feeling of her lips so close sending a shiver through her, “She doesn’t have to know about anything, not a single thing.”
Emily’s mind was spinning, her breath quickening, she didn’t know how a simple conversation with Effy had turned into them being so close that she could smell the stale booze and fags lingering in the mass of brown hair and feel light breaths whispering past her ear. She wanted to leave, to walk away because she was with Naomi now - well she half wanted to. The other half of her mind was screaming at her to stay, to fuck Effy blind in the college bathrooms because she knew how fucking amazing it would be.
The next few minutes seem to be gone so quickly that she can only remember tiny moments of them, like the feeling of Effy’s teeth pulling at her bottom lip almost hard enough to make it bleed, or the way Ef had shivered when she’d backed her up against the cold tiles. Emily had known where it was going, and god, she’d really fucking wanted it. But before she could even lock the door of the cubicle Effy had pulled away from a particularly sloppy kiss, with a look of complete fear and hurt in her eyes, and ran. ‘I’ve never seen Effy run’, Emily thought stupidly to herself as she heard the door swing closed behind the brunette.
The toilets were cold and empty now, and her body felt like ice with the absence of Effy’s hot skin against her own; her hand numb and pointless after the unfinished act of feeling Effy’s arousal through her soaking underwear. She leaned her forehead against the icy tiles, and relished in the way it seemed to freeze her mind - maybe she could put a stop to whatever fucked up shit was going on in there.
She washed her hands under freezing water before leaving the bathrooms, feeling the last dregs of Effy running off her fingers. The good news was she had a half day, so only one more lesson to endure before she could get the fuck out of there. The bad news? Effy had left her bag in her rush to escape and Emily, being the ridiculously considerate person she was, couldn’t just leave it there. So she picked it up, weighing it in her hand and turning it round for a quick Fitch examination. Katie would examine a bag for the designer or how fashionable and cool it was, but Emily liked to see how much a bag said about its owner. So, for example, all of Naomi’s bags were big, colourful and often bore political slogans - matching the blonde’s personality perfectly. Effy’s bag, of course, was totally different. It was tiny, completely impractical, and weighed virtually nothing. It was made of a kind of worn brown leather that looked as if it had been lying in some field or desert for a 100 years, just watching the world go by and waiting for the inevitable. It was so completely Effy, that Emily felt a somewhat inexplicable tear sting at her eye. She almost unzipped it, desperate to get a look at the inside of the bag - hoping it would reflect Effy as perfectly as the outside - but she couldn’t bring herself to do it, maybe she just didn’t want to know what Effy was really like. She got the feeling it might be a little too much for anyone to handle.
She stood in the blissful silence of the toilets for a few more minutes before venturing into the noisy and bustling halls of the politics and history department.
Her politics class flew by in a daydream induced blur, and in what seemed like no time at all she was walking down the college steps in the cold winter sunshine, a light breeze pulling at her hair and clothes; and one shoulder pulled down by her heavy bag, only added to by the small addition of Effy’s which was tucked away in between her politics textbooks.
As she walks quickly through the park, her mind wandering to the kiss she will surely receive from Naomi (a kiss to push away any thoughts of Effy), she fails to notice the small frame of Effy lounging on the bench next to Naomi. Coincidence’s cruel sense of humour has led to her and Naomi meeting everyday at the bench where she and Effy first sat and had an actual conversation, where Effy fixed her makeup and they both felt the flickering of lust inside of themselves.
Naomi catches sight of the redhead walking towards them just as Effy does, and both girls unconsciously shift their positions - Naomi perching on the edge of the bench, Effy slouching even lower and lighting another fag. The minute Naomi caught sight of the redhead she felt a clenching round her heart, everyday they spent together she just wanted her more and more, needed her. Naomi felt her face pulling into a stupid grin as she stood up and Emily got closer, she saw the way Emily’s returning smile slipped into something that was more a grimace of discomfort.
That was when Naomi turned to look at Effy, who was surely the source of Emily’s discomfort, and caught the wink that the brunette had thrown out there with a smirk - throwing a spanner in the works of the happiness that the other two girls were working so hard to build, that Naomi was working to build. That wink, it could have been friendly, it could easily have been a joke, but Naomi felt something in it, saw something that made her stomach churn with anxiety. There was definitely something there that Emily wasn’t telling her and although she knew that from the history of their short relationship it had, up until now, been her doing all the lying and screwing up, she couldn’t help but feel as if the balance might be shifting.
Her first instinct was to run, to get away from there and to hell with the consequences, even if this was just an honest mistake it was surely better to be out of there right? But not anymore, she wasn’t like that anymore. For Emily’s sake, she wasn’t that person anymore, she’d sworn that she wouldn’t run away anymore, neither of them would - they were together now and arguments could be resolved if they both just stuck around long enough.
“Ems,” Naomi whispered as she pulled her girlfriend in close, inhaling the scent of her hair and kissing her a little harder than necessary. It was probably a little possessive but it felt good to be with Emily like that and damn anyone who was nearby, especially if they were winking seductively at her girlfriend. “Me and Effy here were just having a little chat.” The smile on her face was so forced that it felt like her lips would tear from the effort of it, but she needed Emily to know that everything was ok so that she could just stop looking like the scared rabbit that she’d always been when they’d first met. Naomi had a sudden overpowering urge to keep Emily from anything that made her look like that, and right now it meant keeping her the hell away from the skinny bitch sat on the bench smirking at the two of them.
Emily sighed as she felt Naomi press up against her, it was exactly what she’d been looking for as she’d walked through the cold park only she hadn’t anticipated an audience. She stood on tiptoes so that her chin rested on the taller girl’s shoulder, and pressed her cold cheek up against Naomi’s neck. Effy took the opportunity to catch her eye and wiggle her eyebrows before winking again. Emily would have laughed but for the fucking awful situation it was putting her in.
‘Torn between two lovers’ as the old song goes. She remembered when her and Katie were kids and her mum had sung it while she clattered round the kitchen, a lifetime ago.
Only it’s not quite right really is it, she thinks. More like a lover and a love. An ex-lover, a strictly onetime event kind of thing, and a love for that matter. Only it wasn’t really a onetime only thing was it, because since then she’d thought about it on several occasions, and that’s pretty much as bad as actually doing it. And today, god, today in the loos pressed up against the tiles.
Naomi feels Emily stiffen in her arms and pull away. It might be, Naomi thinks, that no one is physically running, but it feels an awful lot like they’re getting further and further apart all over again.
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Ok, so i'm not actually sure about this chapter. Let me know what you think, i'd really appreciate some constructive criticism as always :) This is a pretty long one for me so i really just posted it without checking for mistakes etc. so if you notice any bits that don't make sense then please, for the sake of my sanity, just ignore them lol.
Pairing: Emily/Naomi
Rating: Quite a bit of swearing, 'F' and 'C' words so probably R.
Word Count: 2,887
Disclaimer: I don't any of Skins or any of the characters, although i do wish Lily Loveless was mine ;-)
Summary: As i've already mentioned i have decided to take this story into the realms of fiction, as such you can all stop thinking that my life is so interesting lol. But seriously thanks so much if you're still following this, and if you haven't read any of it before then you definitely should because readers and comments make me happy :)
A/N: So this chapter backtracks to cover the Effy chapter, but following Naomi and Emily instead. Any bits of this that are taken directly from 'Effy 2' are in italics.
Emily had sure as hell meant it when she’d said ‘slow’, Naomi thought, they’d talked a lot in the week since she’d uttered those words, but not a lot else had happened. And that was fine with the blonde, well it would have been if it weren’t for the fact that Emily seemed to be a bit distant, seemed to be keeping something from her. But that was fucking ridiculous, right? After all they’d been through, it was downright dumb to think that Ems could be lying to her or betraying her in some way after everything. It must just be her own paranoia, her own fear of commitment. But it sure as hell felt like a lot more than that.
Instead of lessening though, her fears had only increased, her stomach churning with the anxiety of it all, when she’d decided to walk with Ems to college and she’d pointed out that Effy girl. She’d done it with a look in her eye that worried Naomi, a look that said that maybe all wasn’t as right with the world as she’d hoped. Since then Naomi had walked the redhead every day. She did it because she needed to, because with everything going on inside her head she needed to know that she would be on Emily’s mind while she was at college. It was childish and petty and untrusting, but everyday she would kiss Emily long and hard on the steps of the college, ignoring the stares and whispers, just trying to leave some kind of mark, physical or emotional.
“We’re not having sex.” She’d said matter-of-factly to her mum one day, with a slight blush colouring her cheeks. “It’s been four days and we’re not even... we just talk and sleep.”
“Oooh goodness me, four whole days?! How ever are you coping?” Her mum had laughed back, her voice dripping with sarcasm. Naomi had thought that would be it, that she’d overestimated her mother’s skill at giving good advice. But just as Gina was about to leave the kitchen for work, she’d turned back to her daughter and, laying a hand on her shoulder, said gently, “give it time love, just give it time.” And kissed her on the cheek before leaving.
“Right,” Naomi had muttered to herself as her mum gathered her things together.
As Gina stepped out of the front door Naomi had heard her laugh again and say, more to herself than to anyone else “four days... honestly!”
Emily had been having just as much trouble as Naomi, although the blonde seemed not to notice. She didn’t even seem to catch onto the way that Emily’s breath would catch and her eyes stray whenever Naomi stripped off to her underwear and a vest top when they went to bed. It was getting damn near impossible for the redhead to keep her hands to herself, but she knew that they needed to take this slow - just like they’d said - for both their sakes.
She was finding all of this especially difficult seeing as she hadn’t actually been home for more than 5 minutes at a time since this had all started. She knew from what Katie had told her, her voice laced with poison, that her parents were really freaking out but that her sister had grudgingly persuaded them to leave it be for now. For that Emily was monumentally grateful, and it showed her that maybe there was still some hope for the two of them.
It was all going pretty well actually, within a week most of the shit seemed to have settled down, her and Nai were doing better than ever and Katie had come over to talk to her voluntarily a few times. She was happy, and that was something that she hadn’t really been able to say much in her life before. She hadn’t seen Effy much since the night before everything had happened with her and Naomi in spite of her own efforts, the other girl had seemed to dodge her whenever she tried to talk and it was starting to mess with her head a bit.
One morning, before class, she popped to the toilets to sort out her hair - the taste of Naomi’s kiss still on her lips. As she’d leant towards the grimy mirror, analysing her roots, she’d heard the door swing open and shut again. Glancing round she saw Effy standing with her back against the door, and felt her breath catch in her throat. Effy took a step towards the redhead, placing her hand on the edge of a sink that was two along from where Emily was stood. Even at this proximity she could feel Effy’s eyes burning a hole, even in the filthy college toilets she could almost smell the gender neutral odour of Effy’s sheets. The way that Effy looked at her... it was too much.
The silence was stretching on and it was just making things worse, she decided that she would have to say something, anything, to make this just a little less weird and awkward. She turned back to the mirror, she couldn’t look into Effy’s penetrating blue eyes any longer, and opened her mouth to try to diffuse this tension. But before she could say anything Effy had beaten her to it.
“Told her?” Those two words were so smothered in Effy’s usual brand of casual indifference that Emily could almost believe she didn’t care. But lately she’d been able to see through Effy’s charade, been able to see past all the bravado and confidence. Because the truth was with Effy, if she didn’t care she wouldn’t ask. So as nonchalant as she acted, Emily knew that her answer would matter to Effy.
However, as much as she would love to answer Effy’s question honestly, to show her that they were friends and that they could talk about anything, she really didn’t have a fucking clue what the other girl was talking about. Effy rolled her eyes at the redhead, and Emily almost laughed right then because, god, Effy was fucking hilarious when she thought someone was being an idiot. But the laughter was stopped before it could pass through her lips by Effy smirking with anything but laughter lighting her eyes, “Our little wander together into lesbo-land.”
‘Fuck, fuck, fuck.’ Emily’s mind was spinning almost as much as Effy’s. She’d thought that, what with the way Effy had sent her on her way last time they’d been alone together, they would be able to leave what had happened between them in the past. It didn’t seem to her as if Naomi would have to know, it had ended before they had even got together really. If there had ever really been anything to end, it was really nothing between them, just a shag... ‘except it’s never just a shag for you is it?’ she thought, ‘you care too bloody much.’
“No... I d-don’t think she erm... n-needs to know exactly.” She finally managed, after several long seconds of Effy looking at her like they were fucking at that very moment. Fuck, she hadn’t stuttered that much since she was a kid. Guilt was washing over her in long hot waves, she couldn’t figure out when the fuck she’d become the person that cheats on her girlfriend and then says something like that. But, was it really cheating...
Effy’s eyes were all over Emily, she could almost feel them whispering along her skin, there was something going on with Effy today, some lowering of inhibitions and it worried Emily. It was exactly the sort of thing that could lead to the two of them shagging in the filthy college loos. Problem was, now she’d thought about shagging in the loos, it was all she could think about, the only way she could see this conversation ending. While she was trying to get the all-too-graphic images of her and Effy up against the cold white tiles out of her mind, she hadn’t even noticed that Effy had closed the gap between them. Hadn’t noticed, that is until Effy’s hot, wet breaths were hitting her skin and sending a jolt down to her stomach and even lower.
Before she had a chance to stop herself Effy was reaching out and brushing a lock of vibrant red hair from beautiful pale skin, she was running a gentle hand up Emily’s arm and leaving a trail of goosebumps in the wake of her tentative fingers.
“You’re right,” she felt Effy whisper against the sensitive skin at the base of her neck, the feeling of her lips so close sending a shiver through her, “She doesn’t have to know about anything, not a single thing.”
Emily’s mind was spinning, her breath quickening, she didn’t know how a simple conversation with Effy had turned into them being so close that she could smell the stale booze and fags lingering in the mass of brown hair and feel light breaths whispering past her ear. She wanted to leave, to walk away because she was with Naomi now - well she half wanted to. The other half of her mind was screaming at her to stay, to fuck Effy blind in the college bathrooms because she knew how fucking amazing it would be.
The next few minutes seem to be gone so quickly that she can only remember tiny moments of them, like the feeling of Effy’s teeth pulling at her bottom lip almost hard enough to make it bleed, or the way Ef had shivered when she’d backed her up against the cold tiles. Emily had known where it was going, and god, she’d really fucking wanted it. But before she could even lock the door of the cubicle Effy had pulled away from a particularly sloppy kiss, with a look of complete fear and hurt in her eyes, and ran. ‘I’ve never seen Effy run’, Emily thought stupidly to herself as she heard the door swing closed behind the brunette.
The toilets were cold and empty now, and her body felt like ice with the absence of Effy’s hot skin against her own; her hand numb and pointless after the unfinished act of feeling Effy’s arousal through her soaking underwear. She leaned her forehead against the icy tiles, and relished in the way it seemed to freeze her mind - maybe she could put a stop to whatever fucked up shit was going on in there.
She washed her hands under freezing water before leaving the bathrooms, feeling the last dregs of Effy running off her fingers. The good news was she had a half day, so only one more lesson to endure before she could get the fuck out of there. The bad news? Effy had left her bag in her rush to escape and Emily, being the ridiculously considerate person she was, couldn’t just leave it there. So she picked it up, weighing it in her hand and turning it round for a quick Fitch examination. Katie would examine a bag for the designer or how fashionable and cool it was, but Emily liked to see how much a bag said about its owner. So, for example, all of Naomi’s bags were big, colourful and often bore political slogans - matching the blonde’s personality perfectly. Effy’s bag, of course, was totally different. It was tiny, completely impractical, and weighed virtually nothing. It was made of a kind of worn brown leather that looked as if it had been lying in some field or desert for a 100 years, just watching the world go by and waiting for the inevitable. It was so completely Effy, that Emily felt a somewhat inexplicable tear sting at her eye. She almost unzipped it, desperate to get a look at the inside of the bag - hoping it would reflect Effy as perfectly as the outside - but she couldn’t bring herself to do it, maybe she just didn’t want to know what Effy was really like. She got the feeling it might be a little too much for anyone to handle.
She stood in the blissful silence of the toilets for a few more minutes before venturing into the noisy and bustling halls of the politics and history department.
Her politics class flew by in a daydream induced blur, and in what seemed like no time at all she was walking down the college steps in the cold winter sunshine, a light breeze pulling at her hair and clothes; and one shoulder pulled down by her heavy bag, only added to by the small addition of Effy’s which was tucked away in between her politics textbooks.
As she walks quickly through the park, her mind wandering to the kiss she will surely receive from Naomi (a kiss to push away any thoughts of Effy), she fails to notice the small frame of Effy lounging on the bench next to Naomi. Coincidence’s cruel sense of humour has led to her and Naomi meeting everyday at the bench where she and Effy first sat and had an actual conversation, where Effy fixed her makeup and they both felt the flickering of lust inside of themselves.
Naomi catches sight of the redhead walking towards them just as Effy does, and both girls unconsciously shift their positions - Naomi perching on the edge of the bench, Effy slouching even lower and lighting another fag. The minute Naomi caught sight of the redhead she felt a clenching round her heart, everyday they spent together she just wanted her more and more, needed her. Naomi felt her face pulling into a stupid grin as she stood up and Emily got closer, she saw the way Emily’s returning smile slipped into something that was more a grimace of discomfort.
That was when Naomi turned to look at Effy, who was surely the source of Emily’s discomfort, and caught the wink that the brunette had thrown out there with a smirk - throwing a spanner in the works of the happiness that the other two girls were working so hard to build, that Naomi was working to build. That wink, it could have been friendly, it could easily have been a joke, but Naomi felt something in it, saw something that made her stomach churn with anxiety. There was definitely something there that Emily wasn’t telling her and although she knew that from the history of their short relationship it had, up until now, been her doing all the lying and screwing up, she couldn’t help but feel as if the balance might be shifting.
Her first instinct was to run, to get away from there and to hell with the consequences, even if this was just an honest mistake it was surely better to be out of there right? But not anymore, she wasn’t like that anymore. For Emily’s sake, she wasn’t that person anymore, she’d sworn that she wouldn’t run away anymore, neither of them would - they were together now and arguments could be resolved if they both just stuck around long enough.
“Ems,” Naomi whispered as she pulled her girlfriend in close, inhaling the scent of her hair and kissing her a little harder than necessary. It was probably a little possessive but it felt good to be with Emily like that and damn anyone who was nearby, especially if they were winking seductively at her girlfriend. “Me and Effy here were just having a little chat.” The smile on her face was so forced that it felt like her lips would tear from the effort of it, but she needed Emily to know that everything was ok so that she could just stop looking like the scared rabbit that she’d always been when they’d first met. Naomi had a sudden overpowering urge to keep Emily from anything that made her look like that, and right now it meant keeping her the hell away from the skinny bitch sat on the bench smirking at the two of them.
Emily sighed as she felt Naomi press up against her, it was exactly what she’d been looking for as she’d walked through the cold park only she hadn’t anticipated an audience. She stood on tiptoes so that her chin rested on the taller girl’s shoulder, and pressed her cold cheek up against Naomi’s neck. Effy took the opportunity to catch her eye and wiggle her eyebrows before winking again. Emily would have laughed but for the fucking awful situation it was putting her in.
‘Torn between two lovers’ as the old song goes. She remembered when her and Katie were kids and her mum had sung it while she clattered round the kitchen, a lifetime ago.
Only it’s not quite right really is it, she thinks. More like a lover and a love. An ex-lover, a strictly onetime event kind of thing, and a love for that matter. Only it wasn’t really a onetime only thing was it, because since then she’d thought about it on several occasions, and that’s pretty much as bad as actually doing it. And today, god, today in the loos pressed up against the tiles.
Naomi feels Emily stiffen in her arms and pull away. It might be, Naomi thinks, that no one is physically running, but it feels an awful lot like they’re getting further and further apart all over again.
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Ok, so i'm not actually sure about this chapter. Let me know what you think, i'd really appreciate some constructive criticism as always :) This is a pretty long one for me so i really just posted it without checking for mistakes etc. so if you notice any bits that don't make sense then please, for the sake of my sanity, just ignore them lol.