(no subject)
Dreams are pretty cool. I dreamed I was interviewing to teach English in Argentina. I actually had a similar dream the night before too; in both of these dreams I was speaking Spanish with someone and could understand about half of what they were saying. It's funny how I can dream in a foreign language and my brain knows how to simulate incomplete comprehension.
It still hasn't sunk in that I'm going to be pretty far away soon.
I'm MAD. I want to go to New York. I never asked or prayed to go to England. It just got dropped into my lap. I am not ungrateful, but I feel like I'm skipping a stepping stone. Fuck it, I've never seen Philly and my grandparents live an hour away from there, and I lived just outside Washington DC for 2 years and didn't see the Washington Monument until 3 years after I moved to Florida. So whatever.
Tomorrow I have to wake up bright and early for some irrelevant job training. It's past 2 am now.
My girlfriend is going to get tattooed soon. She stretched her ears from a piercing to like a 2g over the past 2 months or so. Again... I'm not ungrateful to go to England... but wouldn't it be nice to be blessed with things I want most instead of something nice but that I really never wanted?
Or maybe I wanted to go to London when I was like 8 years old and prayers are on a 14 year waiting list...
Maybe I should stop assuming that I'll be in a vehicle the whole time. But really, I'm just a tool. A paid extra pair of hands, a hired gun. They've already been there 3 times, so there's no reason to think they'd do "touristy" shit another time for my sake.
Also I hate experiencing new things with people who have already experienced them. Movies, travel, etc. Blair has already done it all. I want to have someone to share my wonderment with who hasn't already seen everything. Maybe this is a reason why people make children.
I can't help but to be negative. At least writing feels good.
It still hasn't sunk in that I'm going to be pretty far away soon.
I'm MAD. I want to go to New York. I never asked or prayed to go to England. It just got dropped into my lap. I am not ungrateful, but I feel like I'm skipping a stepping stone. Fuck it, I've never seen Philly and my grandparents live an hour away from there, and I lived just outside Washington DC for 2 years and didn't see the Washington Monument until 3 years after I moved to Florida. So whatever.
Tomorrow I have to wake up bright and early for some irrelevant job training. It's past 2 am now.
My girlfriend is going to get tattooed soon. She stretched her ears from a piercing to like a 2g over the past 2 months or so. Again... I'm not ungrateful to go to England... but wouldn't it be nice to be blessed with things I want most instead of something nice but that I really never wanted?
Or maybe I wanted to go to London when I was like 8 years old and prayers are on a 14 year waiting list...
Maybe I should stop assuming that I'll be in a vehicle the whole time. But really, I'm just a tool. A paid extra pair of hands, a hired gun. They've already been there 3 times, so there's no reason to think they'd do "touristy" shit another time for my sake.
Also I hate experiencing new things with people who have already experienced them. Movies, travel, etc. Blair has already done it all. I want to have someone to share my wonderment with who hasn't already seen everything. Maybe this is a reason why people make children.
I can't help but to be negative. At least writing feels good.