When the common thread in your dysfunctional relationships is you...
What a weekend. What a couple of months....
I seem to have two modes with women. I'm attracted to them or I'm not. Inevitably, and ironically, this results in two responses.
The ones I'm not attracted to, become Puppies. Cling is not the word; chemical bonding is more like it.
The ones I am attracted to, they go away.
A lover I'll call 't' came to visit. We considered ourselves poly secondaries... She came to visit. While she was out here she hooked up with 'ft'. And they decided they'd rather be mono together. (ting)
I met 'd'; Met means, she sexually jumped me at a get together. We got together for four months. During this time I was told on a regular basis all the things that I was doing to intentionally make her upset with me. I drove away friends and activities trying to show the person I was serious. Then I realized, I wasn't being me... (ting)
A lover I'll call 'sm' came to visit. The week was stunning. We connected in ways I'd never connected before. We both got poly. We both found the small acceptable levels of jealousy, that say we're really into each other. She went home and found a cute guy. Oh, we're okay... (now) as long as this doesn't change anything, except that she's not coming back anytime soon, and wanting to explore her new mono relationship. (ting)
During the visit sm & I met and hooked up with 'p.' P was a third to compliment some of the things we wanted to do. P had the potential of being a secondary... Then 'sm' dumped the news. Now, I'm left with 'P' who's coming off as head over heels at all times except when you call her on it. And I really don't think I'm that attracted to her.
Why write this...
There seems to be an unwritten policy that men aren't supposed to find themselves attracted to women. Their job is to be cool, aloof, and distant until some woman deems him worthy of her interests. If he jumps the gun on this, he is needy or clingy, which again is on the list of detractors.
I guess this is why the male of the species must be defined as being on the prowl. Like a great feline beast, he can stalk, he can evaluate, he can even thirst and hunger; but unless he pounces, at and only at the exact, perfect moment; His prey is guaranteed to spring off at top speed away, as fast as it can... no matter how satisfying the result may have been.
Now of course this little analogy breaks down when you consider that the prey is running for life for fear of being mauled and devoured... Hmmn. Hmph, the sexual allusion intrigued me there.
*shrug*
Philosophically; I'm just going to be me... No games... we'll maybe some 'play' but no games. If I like someone; I'm going to like them. Hopefully they'll like me too. And the interaction will be maintained.
Ack... Fuzzy, human day. We'll return you to my being a hard ass again in a few days.
I seem to have two modes with women. I'm attracted to them or I'm not. Inevitably, and ironically, this results in two responses.
The ones I'm not attracted to, become Puppies. Cling is not the word; chemical bonding is more like it.
The ones I am attracted to, they go away.
A lover I'll call 't' came to visit. We considered ourselves poly secondaries... She came to visit. While she was out here she hooked up with 'ft'. And they decided they'd rather be mono together. (ting)
I met 'd'; Met means, she sexually jumped me at a get together. We got together for four months. During this time I was told on a regular basis all the things that I was doing to intentionally make her upset with me. I drove away friends and activities trying to show the person I was serious. Then I realized, I wasn't being me... (ting)
A lover I'll call 'sm' came to visit. The week was stunning. We connected in ways I'd never connected before. We both got poly. We both found the small acceptable levels of jealousy, that say we're really into each other. She went home and found a cute guy. Oh, we're okay... (now) as long as this doesn't change anything, except that she's not coming back anytime soon, and wanting to explore her new mono relationship. (ting)
During the visit sm & I met and hooked up with 'p.' P was a third to compliment some of the things we wanted to do. P had the potential of being a secondary... Then 'sm' dumped the news. Now, I'm left with 'P' who's coming off as head over heels at all times except when you call her on it. And I really don't think I'm that attracted to her.
Why write this...
There seems to be an unwritten policy that men aren't supposed to find themselves attracted to women. Their job is to be cool, aloof, and distant until some woman deems him worthy of her interests. If he jumps the gun on this, he is needy or clingy, which again is on the list of detractors.
I guess this is why the male of the species must be defined as being on the prowl. Like a great feline beast, he can stalk, he can evaluate, he can even thirst and hunger; but unless he pounces, at and only at the exact, perfect moment; His prey is guaranteed to spring off at top speed away, as fast as it can... no matter how satisfying the result may have been.
Now of course this little analogy breaks down when you consider that the prey is running for life for fear of being mauled and devoured... Hmmn. Hmph, the sexual allusion intrigued me there.
*shrug*
Philosophically; I'm just going to be me... No games... we'll maybe some 'play' but no games. If I like someone; I'm going to like them. Hopefully they'll like me too. And the interaction will be maintained.
Ack... Fuzzy, human day. We'll return you to my being a hard ass again in a few days.