Goldi is dreading the 4th

[goldentress]

The kids started celebrating a day early. I have firecrackers strewn across my front and back lawn, and I'm even sure Timmy managed to launch a few onto my roof and into several of my trees. If this is a preview of what tomorrow's block party is going to be like, then consider me gone... I'm sure I can find a nice piece of property in Pennsylvania

Comments

[biggestbear]

If memory serves, fireworks are illegal in the state of New York. Timmy'll have a time of it convincing the judge he's innocent.

[goldentress]

They are, but I'm not about to call the police on a kid five times younger than me.

[biggestbear]

I'm not saying you should rat on Timmy, but as far as your dog's safety is concerned, maybe Anne and Ray deserve a finger shake.

[goldentress]

I was thinking along the line of joint lobotomies, but a finger shake might have to do.

[biggestbear]

Well, the doctor does know best. Too bad neither of her prospective patients has a brain in which to lobotomize.

[goldentress]

Of course I do. Apparently they passed that handicap on to their child.

[biggestbear]

So, just to clarify, will those of us who don't terrorize you or your dog have access to your new address in Pennsylvania?

[goldentress]

I suppose one or two might be allowed to know it, seeing as I will need all of my mail forwarded to me...

[biggestbear]

Well then, seeing as no one on this block can be trusted with such important information, I'd nominate Connie and or Greg. Then again, their mail forwarding skills leave something to be desired.

Suppose that leaves me.

[goldentress]

Connie and Greg would send my mail to a nondescript location in Africa, I'm sure of it.

Or Vanessa.

I'll have to weigh my options.

[biggestbear]

By weighing are you talking about brains or silicone? Because if it's the latter, I think she's got me beat hands down.

[goldentress]

Considering that I would like my mail to float if it landed in a lake or river, her silicone might actually put her ahead of you.

I just don't see you as the fetching-of-mail type.

[biggestbear]

Little did the unsuspecting veterinarian know that her leprechaun of a neighbor came from a long line of top-notch mail fetchers.

[goldentress]

Is that so? Then what is my leprechaun-mail-fetching neighbor doing as a mean politician?

[biggestbear]

Dental plan's better.

Plus, you'd be surprised at how many attractive veterinarians moving to Pennsylvania, there are out there. This attractive, though, was beyond this old mail-fetcher's imagination.

[goldentress]

It sounds like the beginning of a strange modern-day fairy tale, Mr. Fisher.