I was about to break out into Bear Necessities.
We just had one of the best, lulziest DnD sessions ever. It is here for your enjoyment.
Renyn: Elven Cleric with a nasty temper, but otherwise a nice guy. Leader, sort of, if he can ever grow some balls. Played by me.
Mikor: Half-Elven Fighter. Likes to stick his tool in anything that moves. Currently with Renyn. Played by kippurbird
Kiorin: Eladrin Warlock, entirely insane. Believes the Stars will kill anyone he gets involved with. Usty with Phai. Played by canadianevil
Phaien: Only human of the group, Wizard. Clueless Wonder. Recently had the blinders ripped off, it was traumatic. Kicked puppy-style ust for Ki. soberloki
Renyn:
We need to be quiet and stay unnoticed. Considering we're a bunch of Fey in a forest, that shouldn't be too hard...hopefully.
Narrator:
*SNORT*
Mikor:
What about the human?
Renyn:
Piggy back?
Renyn:
Phaien, you can be quiet and sneaky, right?
Phaien:
I can, yes,
Renyn:
Good. Let's go.
Renyn:
Stealth Check: 8
Renyn: (( LOL ))
Narrator:
Masterful!
Phaien:
Stealth Check: 18
Kiorin:
Stealth Check: 8
Mikor:
Stealth Check: 3
Mikor:
.......
Elven Mage 1:
Who goes there?
Mikor:
BARDS!
Renyn:
Start singing, Ki
Kiorin: IA KHIRAD, AZPV'KAAAALIGXACKZ!
* Renyn joins in
* Mikor does too!
* Phaien plugs ears with fingers and joins in
Kiorin: G'VB'JKLMN'GLARMAZIACHE
Phaien:
G'VB'JKLMN'GLARMAZIACHE...
Elven Mage 1:
Halt, human!
Renyn:
G'VB'JKLMN'GLARMAZIACHE?
Kiorin: UND ELADRINLAND UBER ALLES...
Phaien:
WAKA WAKA WAKA...
Mikor:
G'VB'JKLMN'GLARMAZIACHE?!!
Renyn:
UND ELADRINLAND UBER ALLES... WAIT WHUT?
Phaien:
Oh crusty cheese...
* Mikor hisses, Just go with it!
* Renyn hisses back, But he's singing about Eladrinland!
Kiorin:
Y'STALPZHX AZGAZHNIX HYURTISHBLS
Phaien:
K'THEAMSDOI PEOFJFH! WEEEEEEE
Renyn:
Y'STALPZHX AZGAZHNIX HYURTISHBLS!
Phaien:
MYHARBLS REDNUTSASDFLU
Renyn:
Oh god they probably think we're drunk
Mikor:
T"KAAAAhhhhHHHHILUUULLSSKH!!!
Elven Mage 1:
Bluff checks to make them think you're drunk!
Mikor:
I feel like it
Renyn:
Bluff Check: 29
Phaien:
Bluff Check: 17
Mikor:
Bluff Check: 22
* Renyn IS DERY VUNK
Kiorin:
Bluff Check: 14
Kiorin: *isn't drunk, just crazy*
* Mikor throws arms out wide while burbling!
* Renyn leans on Mikor
Kiorin: T'HE W'ZRD'S STAF'FHAS A KUHN'OB ONITZ ENED~
Mikor:
KLAHALLLL ROUND KUNHM'OMB!!
* Phaien turns around and pretends to loudly technicolor yawn all over the tree behind him
Phaien:
ORGHH
Phaien:
YWAWWRGH
Renyn:
AR VERERSY RUONDSA KLNOBD~~
Mikor:
KNORD! EW ERA KNORD!!
Phaien:
DRAGOSTEA DIN TEI IOHFSDB
Renyn:
WEEEEEEEEEE FUCKITY DEE
Elven Mage 1:
............
Renyn:
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII KORRUMBA
Mikor:
KUUUMMMMBAAAYIIIII YAAAAAAA MAAAHHH LOOOORD!!!
Kiorin: *adjusts his hair* OUR PERFORMANCES ARE THE BEST IN ALL OF THIS NATION, DAMN RIGHT THEY ARE.
Renyn:
CARAMELLANELLA DANSEN
Mikor:
NOROD
Phaien:
AWWURRGHUL
Phaien:
WE STAND ON GUARD FOR THEEEEEEEE...
Renyn:
CONJUNCTION JUNCTION WHAT BE YOUR FUNCTIONSS
Mikor:
WHERE'S THE MOUNTAIN DEW?!!
Renyn:
I'MMA JUST A BILL, SITTING HERE...ON A TREE
Kiorin: WE ARE THE TREE BOTTOM PLAYERS, HERE FOR ONE NIGHT ONLY. AND NOW WE'RE LEAVING.
Mikor:
WAITING FOR OBAMA TO TAKE CARE OF ME!!
Kiorin: *starts wandering away from the elves*
* Renyn stumbles after him
Renyn:
WRAIT~!
Kiorin: Move along, ya drunken loouts!
* Mikor wobbles!
Elven Mage 1:
You lot are absolutely drunk, aren't you?
Mikor:
AHM NOT DRUNK!! I'M A BIG STAR!!
Elven Mage 1:
What are you doing in this forest anyways?
Mikor:
REALLY BIG! BIGGER THAN THE SON!
Elven Mage 1:
You should know this area is off limits
Renyn:
NOT DRUNKESH MISTER ELF SIR.
Renyn:
WE DOES?
Mikor:
WE'RE STARS! STARS DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO SUCH THINGS!! WOULD YOU LIKE MY AUTHOGRAPH?!
Renyn:
WE SHOULD GET OUT, MAN. THEY'LL LIKE SHOOT US OR SOMETHING. *stumbles faster*
Kiorin: This isn't the road to... uh, the road?
Kiorin: Can you poshi- possibly point us there?
Mikor:
BUT THEY'RE MY FANSS!! *stumbles around*
Kiorin: C'mon y'drunken sots, they don' wan' us here...
Mikor:
FINE. THEN THEY CAN'T HAVE ME!
Elven Mage 1:
We can't... what? We're the ones in charge here!
Mikor:
YUOR NOT GETTING MY AUTHOGEAPH NOW!
Renyn:
YES YUO R MISTER SIR
Kiorin: If ya'll kindly poin' us back t'the road, we'll get outa yer hair.
Renyn:
AND THEN WE CAN FIUND A PARTEEEEEEE
Phaien:
But Kiroin, I don't WANNA go on the road. The brownies will find me!
Mikor:
PARTY! PARTY! PARTY! PARTY!
Phaien:
I'm back now
Phaien:
PARTY GOOD BROWNIES BAD
Renyn:
BROWNIES GOOD TOOOOO
Renyn:
I HAD ONE OF MARGERAARATES BROWNIES, HEH. DUDE.
Mikor:
WASTING AWAY AGAIN IN MARGARITAVILLE LOOKING FOR MY LOST SHAKER OF SALT!!
Renyn:
OH I THINK I HAVE THAT. HEHE.
Narrator:
You guys realize that you have basically short-circuited what I had planned for this week, and I have no more maps ready after this? I mean it's not even 8pm, and I'm out of maps to do stuff on. Congratulations, you bullshitted your way past the guards and earned yourself an RP only session :)
Renyn:
DUDE
Renyn:
We are awesome
Renyn: Elven Cleric with a nasty temper, but otherwise a nice guy. Leader, sort of, if he can ever grow some balls. Played by me.
Mikor: Half-Elven Fighter. Likes to stick his tool in anything that moves. Currently with Renyn. Played by kippurbird
Kiorin: Eladrin Warlock, entirely insane. Believes the Stars will kill anyone he gets involved with. Usty with Phai. Played by canadianevil
Phaien: Only human of the group, Wizard. Clueless Wonder. Recently had the blinders ripped off, it was traumatic. Kicked puppy-style ust for Ki. soberloki
Renyn:
We need to be quiet and stay unnoticed. Considering we're a bunch of Fey in a forest, that shouldn't be too hard...hopefully.
Narrator:
*SNORT*
Mikor:
What about the human?
Renyn:
Piggy back?
Renyn:
Phaien, you can be quiet and sneaky, right?
Phaien:
I can, yes,
Renyn:
Good. Let's go.
Renyn:
Stealth Check: 8
Renyn: (( LOL ))
Narrator:
Masterful!
Phaien:
Stealth Check: 18
Kiorin:
Stealth Check: 8
Mikor:
Stealth Check: 3
Mikor:
.......
Elven Mage 1:
Who goes there?
Mikor:
BARDS!
Renyn:
Start singing, Ki
Kiorin: IA KHIRAD, AZPV'KAAAALIGXACKZ!
* Renyn joins in
* Mikor does too!
* Phaien plugs ears with fingers and joins in
Kiorin: G'VB'JKLMN'GLARMAZIACHE
Phaien:
G'VB'JKLMN'GLARMAZIACHE...
Elven Mage 1:
Halt, human!
Renyn:
G'VB'JKLMN'GLARMAZIACHE?
Kiorin: UND ELADRINLAND UBER ALLES...
Phaien:
WAKA WAKA WAKA...
Mikor:
G'VB'JKLMN'GLARMAZIACHE?!!
Renyn:
UND ELADRINLAND UBER ALLES... WAIT WHUT?
Phaien:
Oh crusty cheese...
* Mikor hisses, Just go with it!
* Renyn hisses back, But he's singing about Eladrinland!
Kiorin:
Y'STALPZHX AZGAZHNIX HYURTISHBLS
Phaien:
K'THEAMSDOI PEOFJFH! WEEEEEEE
Renyn:
Y'STALPZHX AZGAZHNIX HYURTISHBLS!
Phaien:
MYHARBLS REDNUTSASDFLU
Renyn:
Oh god they probably think we're drunk
Mikor:
T"KAAAAhhhhHHHHILUUULLSSKH!!!
Elven Mage 1:
Bluff checks to make them think you're drunk!
Mikor:
I feel like it
Renyn:
Bluff Check: 29
Phaien:
Bluff Check: 17
Mikor:
Bluff Check: 22
* Renyn IS DERY VUNK
Kiorin:
Bluff Check: 14
Kiorin: *isn't drunk, just crazy*
* Mikor throws arms out wide while burbling!
* Renyn leans on Mikor
Kiorin: T'HE W'ZRD'S STAF'FHAS A KUHN'OB ONITZ ENED~
Mikor:
KLAHALLLL ROUND KUNHM'OMB!!
* Phaien turns around and pretends to loudly technicolor yawn all over the tree behind him
Phaien:
ORGHH
Phaien:
YWAWWRGH
Renyn:
AR VERERSY RUONDSA KLNOBD~~
Mikor:
KNORD! EW ERA KNORD!!
Phaien:
DRAGOSTEA DIN TEI IOHFSDB
Renyn:
WEEEEEEEEEE FUCKITY DEE
Elven Mage 1:
............
Renyn:
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII KORRUMBA
Mikor:
KUUUMMMMBAAAYIIIII YAAAAAAA MAAAHHH LOOOORD!!!
Kiorin: *adjusts his hair* OUR PERFORMANCES ARE THE BEST IN ALL OF THIS NATION, DAMN RIGHT THEY ARE.
Renyn:
CARAMELLANELLA DANSEN
Mikor:
NOROD
Phaien:
AWWURRGHUL
Phaien:
WE STAND ON GUARD FOR THEEEEEEEE...
Renyn:
CONJUNCTION JUNCTION WHAT BE YOUR FUNCTIONSS
Mikor:
WHERE'S THE MOUNTAIN DEW?!!
Renyn:
I'MMA JUST A BILL, SITTING HERE...ON A TREE
Kiorin: WE ARE THE TREE BOTTOM PLAYERS, HERE FOR ONE NIGHT ONLY. AND NOW WE'RE LEAVING.
Mikor:
WAITING FOR OBAMA TO TAKE CARE OF ME!!
Kiorin: *starts wandering away from the elves*
* Renyn stumbles after him
Renyn:
WRAIT~!
Kiorin: Move along, ya drunken loouts!
* Mikor wobbles!
Elven Mage 1:
You lot are absolutely drunk, aren't you?
Mikor:
AHM NOT DRUNK!! I'M A BIG STAR!!
Elven Mage 1:
What are you doing in this forest anyways?
Mikor:
REALLY BIG! BIGGER THAN THE SON!
Elven Mage 1:
You should know this area is off limits
Renyn:
NOT DRUNKESH MISTER ELF SIR.
Renyn:
WE DOES?
Mikor:
WE'RE STARS! STARS DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO SUCH THINGS!! WOULD YOU LIKE MY AUTHOGRAPH?!
Renyn:
WE SHOULD GET OUT, MAN. THEY'LL LIKE SHOOT US OR SOMETHING. *stumbles faster*
Kiorin: This isn't the road to... uh, the road?
Kiorin: Can you poshi- possibly point us there?
Mikor:
BUT THEY'RE MY FANSS!! *stumbles around*
Kiorin: C'mon y'drunken sots, they don' wan' us here...
Mikor:
FINE. THEN THEY CAN'T HAVE ME!
Elven Mage 1:
We can't... what? We're the ones in charge here!
Mikor:
YUOR NOT GETTING MY AUTHOGEAPH NOW!
Renyn:
YES YUO R MISTER SIR
Kiorin: If ya'll kindly poin' us back t'the road, we'll get outa yer hair.
Renyn:
AND THEN WE CAN FIUND A PARTEEEEEEE
Phaien:
But Kiroin, I don't WANNA go on the road. The brownies will find me!
Mikor:
PARTY! PARTY! PARTY! PARTY!
Phaien:
I'm back now
Phaien:
PARTY GOOD BROWNIES BAD
Renyn:
BROWNIES GOOD TOOOOO
Renyn:
I HAD ONE OF MARGERAARATES BROWNIES, HEH. DUDE.
Mikor:
WASTING AWAY AGAIN IN MARGARITAVILLE LOOKING FOR MY LOST SHAKER OF SALT!!
Renyn:
OH I THINK I HAVE THAT. HEHE.
Narrator:
You guys realize that you have basically short-circuited what I had planned for this week, and I have no more maps ready after this? I mean it's not even 8pm, and I'm out of maps to do stuff on. Congratulations, you bullshitted your way past the guards and earned yourself an RP only session :)
Renyn:
DUDE
Renyn:
We are awesome