In which Goldilocks evaluates her Tale.
[Penciled in after original post]
Please don't take this seriously. I know I didn't.
Goldilocks and the Three Bears.
Fox (vixen) = Old woman = Silver-locks = Gold-locks (prettier) = Goldilocks (nicer sounding)
Girl/fox/old woman walks in, girl/fox/old woman contaminates and devours food, girl/fox/old woman breaks-in two chairs and breaks one, girl/fox/old woman messes up the covers in two beds and sleeps in the third.
Moral of the story:
Eat fox=Toss old woman into fire =Throw old woman off of church steeple =Watch as girl jumps out of window and breaks her neck/gets arrested/gets lost in woods (where she starves) =Girl runs out of front door of house = Violence, Violence, Violence and/or Shouting BOOO to see if she runs away.
Why this doesn't work.
1. I hate porridge.
2. I hate wooden chairs.
3. Sleeping in another person's bed makes me cringe.
4. The thought of David Fisher throwing me in a fire makes me laugh.
Maybe Goldilocks just wanted to make some friends.
If not, maybe Goldilocks was looking for coffee.
If that is too far fetched, maybe Goldilocks confused herself as Little Red and thought she was breaking into her Grandmother's house.
Personally I think the bears overreacted.
Who the hell eats/burns/splats a small girl or old woman?
[Moments later, as if suddenly remembered]
Does anyone know where I could find a good florist?
Please don't take this seriously. I know I didn't.
Goldilocks and the Three Bears.
Fox (vixen) = Old woman = Silver-locks = Gold-locks (prettier) = Goldilocks (nicer sounding)
Girl/fox/old woman walks in, girl/fox/old woman contaminates and devours food, girl/fox/old woman breaks-in two chairs and breaks one, girl/fox/old woman messes up the covers in two beds and sleeps in the third.
Moral of the story:
Eat fox=Toss old woman into fire =Throw old woman off of church steeple =Watch as girl jumps out of window and breaks her neck/gets arrested/gets lost in woods (where she starves) =Girl runs out of front door of house = Violence, Violence, Violence and/or Shouting BOOO to see if she runs away.
Why this doesn't work.
1. I hate porridge.
2. I hate wooden chairs.
3. Sleeping in another person's bed makes me cringe.
4. The thought of David Fisher throwing me in a fire makes me laugh.
Maybe Goldilocks just wanted to make some friends.
If not, maybe Goldilocks was looking for coffee.
If that is too far fetched, maybe Goldilocks confused herself as Little Red and thought she was breaking into her Grandmother's house.
Personally I think the bears overreacted.
Who the hell eats/burns/splats a small girl or old woman?
[Moments later, as if suddenly remembered]
Does anyone know where I could find a good florist?