Its 8:35am
The curtain inhales and exhales with the long deep breaths of young love or life long reflection. Its as if the world is playing man or beast for just a moment, allowing its own natural rhythms mimic its own creations. To my left, the sound of birds singing and dancing up in the highest branches of the trees chimes in my ears. While to my right, the deep, melancholy tones of a blues singer accompanied by a lone horn plays in the background. Its already a good morning.
Sitting quietly, listening to the world awaken is so pleasant to me. I'm not sure what it is or why I enjoy it so but really, there's no need to justify it. Simple pleasures... they're everywhere and in everything. I guess it doesn't take much to satisfy me.
He says that he won't go through with the procedure. Well, at least not any time soon. And how could I ever blame him? I wouldn't want to spend the rest of my life dependent on a filtering system. It would be a half life of sorts. I would prefer that even that sort of half life would still show him some sort of benefit, some sort of hope that holding on to more tomorrows is better than letting go today. It still weighs heavy in my heart that I have yet to have a child and create a family. I would so love to have him play with his grandson/daughter. Yet, that desire doesn't push me to do more. At least not in the sense of bringing another life into this world. I realize that only time will tell what the future holds. And there is no need to rush things for the sake of rushing. The worries are constant though. Its become harder and harder to detach myself in order to bring happiness not only to myself but him and my mother... and others around me.
I can hear her cooking in the background. Humming a tune that seems to remind me of a time before I came to know what life was.
Love, its not constant joy or affection. Its the sacrifices and the struggles. The bonds that tie us so closely together that life would cease to make sense without those people we care so deeply about. I think its the thing that gives us hope and a desire to push forward. Humans are such fragile creatures. As time goes on, I think that our instinctual drives get weaker and weaker. We become more dependent on the people that surround us to give us a purpose for living rather than just living for the sake of it. We create all these phantoms that haunt us on a daily basis. These intangible things that we strive for and use to justify our lives. These silly ideas that evolve from mole hills to mountains.
A distraction... The curtain inhales and exhales with deep breaths as if to be in meditative contemplation. As if to say... "Breathe, Relax, and Let Go... Things don't have to be so complicated."
*For those of you that don't know, I've been blogging more in my myspace blog than here. You're welcome to read it if you wish. Just an FYI.
Sitting quietly, listening to the world awaken is so pleasant to me. I'm not sure what it is or why I enjoy it so but really, there's no need to justify it. Simple pleasures... they're everywhere and in everything. I guess it doesn't take much to satisfy me.
He says that he won't go through with the procedure. Well, at least not any time soon. And how could I ever blame him? I wouldn't want to spend the rest of my life dependent on a filtering system. It would be a half life of sorts. I would prefer that even that sort of half life would still show him some sort of benefit, some sort of hope that holding on to more tomorrows is better than letting go today. It still weighs heavy in my heart that I have yet to have a child and create a family. I would so love to have him play with his grandson/daughter. Yet, that desire doesn't push me to do more. At least not in the sense of bringing another life into this world. I realize that only time will tell what the future holds. And there is no need to rush things for the sake of rushing. The worries are constant though. Its become harder and harder to detach myself in order to bring happiness not only to myself but him and my mother... and others around me.
I can hear her cooking in the background. Humming a tune that seems to remind me of a time before I came to know what life was.
Love, its not constant joy or affection. Its the sacrifices and the struggles. The bonds that tie us so closely together that life would cease to make sense without those people we care so deeply about. I think its the thing that gives us hope and a desire to push forward. Humans are such fragile creatures. As time goes on, I think that our instinctual drives get weaker and weaker. We become more dependent on the people that surround us to give us a purpose for living rather than just living for the sake of it. We create all these phantoms that haunt us on a daily basis. These intangible things that we strive for and use to justify our lives. These silly ideas that evolve from mole hills to mountains.
A distraction... The curtain inhales and exhales with deep breaths as if to be in meditative contemplation. As if to say... "Breathe, Relax, and Let Go... Things don't have to be so complicated."
*For those of you that don't know, I've been blogging more in my myspace blog than here. You're welcome to read it if you wish. Just an FYI.