so I don't forget
Today is Sept 11, and it's hard to believe that 10 years have gone my. 10 years ago I didn't know who JM was, there wasn't facebook or message boards. I didn't even live in KC so didn't have any of my current friends. It almost seems like it was in another lifetime, but at the same time it doesn't. I know as time goes on the details fade, so I thought I should write them down somewhere so they aren't lost to history.
I was living in Wichita and working as a social worker at Riverside hospital. I was on my last week of working there as I had just accepted a new job at a hospice company. I usually ate breakfast and watched the Today show before heading to work, but I didn't that morning for some reason---maybe I overslept---and I got breakfast at work.
I arrived at work around 8:30 am central time, got some scrambled eggs and a biscuit from the cafeteria and went to my office. Riverside was a very small, osteopathic hospital, so I had another social worker for a co-worker, and two nurse case managers, one of who shared my office.
I got to my office and was eating my eggs and talking with Coryna, the other social worker. Just a normal day. Lynda, the RN who shared the office with us, came in a few minutes later all in a flurry and excited---in a bad way. She saw us sitting in the office and said "don't you know what is going on? planes are hitting buildings and everything is going crazy". i can't remember if she mentioned it was in NYC, or I just assumed it was some place like that because I wasn't afraid it was happening in Wichita. Now, Lynda was also known for being rather dramatic and excited most of the time, so I wasn't sure what to think. It seems like she went to her desk, then came back to ours and said something about the pentagon being hit. That's when I started to feel the doom. what was happening, when was it going to end, was this the end of the world?
We all went upstairs and went to an empty patient room and turned on the television. (this was before we all had internet at work). I remember standing in the room with several other staff people, looking at the world trade centers on fire. We hadn't been watching long when one of the buildings collapsed. We stayed and watched until the second one collapsed.
We learned that all the planes were being grounded and a lot of planes were landing in Wichita. They made us count the available beds just in case there were medical needs of the passengers who were landing.
It was hard to work. All the patients were watching the news. Most of our patients were older people---old enough to have seen WW II. Even though they had lived through Pearl Harbor, they were very afraid and concerned about this turn of events.
I don't remember anything else about the day---what did I eat? did my co-workers and I talk about it more? I just can't remember.
In the next couple of days I remember walking my dog around the neighborhood and hearing the earie silence of no planes flying in the skies over head. The sky was completely empty of the familiar lines of clouds across the skies of criss-crossing planes. No one was flying any where.
Eventually life returned to normal. I didn't know anyone who had been at the WTC. I didn't know anyone one, who even knew anyone who had died. I did watch all the tv coverage about it though, like I had to know every detail. I was so moved and saddened by the stories of people who got those good-bye phone calls from loved ones on the planes and in the buildings. I just cannot imagine getting a call like that. I'd never pick up the phone again. Those stories still just kill me every time. I also can't imagine being on the other end---knowing you aren't going to make it out alive. I can't even allow my mind to go to that place, wondering what would I do in the same sitaution. Then there were the stories of the people who had survived because they were sick at home that day, or left the office moments before the planes hit and everyone on their floor died but them. Ugh...
I watched and read information for a long time. I couldn't put down the pictures. When the first year anniversary came, I was very sad. Ironically, I had been laid off a job in 9/11/00, and that anniversary didn't occur to me until 2002. I think I stayed in bed 9/11/02.
Time rolled by and I remember watching a news story with women who had babies, that had been pregnant at the time and the dad's never came home. Now those kids were 5.
Today those kids are 10, or almost so. I've started remembering events of my life as before or after 9/11. Like, when did I go to Vegas with my friend Becky for her wedding? Oh yes, after 9/11 because we had to wait until after they got married for the girl trip because her husband, who was a lt colonel in the air force said we weren't flying any where that fall. When did we take our cruise? before 9/11 because flying was a breeze!
This weekend I've been watching the anniversary shows again. There is film footage they've never shown before. Probably for good reason. I don't know if it was good to watch it or not, but I'm about done looking at all of it. I relive all those feelings of doom and sadness again.
I feel for those folks who lost loved ones and hope they have some peace in their life now about those events.
I was living in Wichita and working as a social worker at Riverside hospital. I was on my last week of working there as I had just accepted a new job at a hospice company. I usually ate breakfast and watched the Today show before heading to work, but I didn't that morning for some reason---maybe I overslept---and I got breakfast at work.
I arrived at work around 8:30 am central time, got some scrambled eggs and a biscuit from the cafeteria and went to my office. Riverside was a very small, osteopathic hospital, so I had another social worker for a co-worker, and two nurse case managers, one of who shared my office.
I got to my office and was eating my eggs and talking with Coryna, the other social worker. Just a normal day. Lynda, the RN who shared the office with us, came in a few minutes later all in a flurry and excited---in a bad way. She saw us sitting in the office and said "don't you know what is going on? planes are hitting buildings and everything is going crazy". i can't remember if she mentioned it was in NYC, or I just assumed it was some place like that because I wasn't afraid it was happening in Wichita. Now, Lynda was also known for being rather dramatic and excited most of the time, so I wasn't sure what to think. It seems like she went to her desk, then came back to ours and said something about the pentagon being hit. That's when I started to feel the doom. what was happening, when was it going to end, was this the end of the world?
We all went upstairs and went to an empty patient room and turned on the television. (this was before we all had internet at work). I remember standing in the room with several other staff people, looking at the world trade centers on fire. We hadn't been watching long when one of the buildings collapsed. We stayed and watched until the second one collapsed.
We learned that all the planes were being grounded and a lot of planes were landing in Wichita. They made us count the available beds just in case there were medical needs of the passengers who were landing.
It was hard to work. All the patients were watching the news. Most of our patients were older people---old enough to have seen WW II. Even though they had lived through Pearl Harbor, they were very afraid and concerned about this turn of events.
I don't remember anything else about the day---what did I eat? did my co-workers and I talk about it more? I just can't remember.
In the next couple of days I remember walking my dog around the neighborhood and hearing the earie silence of no planes flying in the skies over head. The sky was completely empty of the familiar lines of clouds across the skies of criss-crossing planes. No one was flying any where.
Eventually life returned to normal. I didn't know anyone who had been at the WTC. I didn't know anyone one, who even knew anyone who had died. I did watch all the tv coverage about it though, like I had to know every detail. I was so moved and saddened by the stories of people who got those good-bye phone calls from loved ones on the planes and in the buildings. I just cannot imagine getting a call like that. I'd never pick up the phone again. Those stories still just kill me every time. I also can't imagine being on the other end---knowing you aren't going to make it out alive. I can't even allow my mind to go to that place, wondering what would I do in the same sitaution. Then there were the stories of the people who had survived because they were sick at home that day, or left the office moments before the planes hit and everyone on their floor died but them. Ugh...
I watched and read information for a long time. I couldn't put down the pictures. When the first year anniversary came, I was very sad. Ironically, I had been laid off a job in 9/11/00, and that anniversary didn't occur to me until 2002. I think I stayed in bed 9/11/02.
Time rolled by and I remember watching a news story with women who had babies, that had been pregnant at the time and the dad's never came home. Now those kids were 5.
Today those kids are 10, or almost so. I've started remembering events of my life as before or after 9/11. Like, when did I go to Vegas with my friend Becky for her wedding? Oh yes, after 9/11 because we had to wait until after they got married for the girl trip because her husband, who was a lt colonel in the air force said we weren't flying any where that fall. When did we take our cruise? before 9/11 because flying was a breeze!
This weekend I've been watching the anniversary shows again. There is film footage they've never shown before. Probably for good reason. I don't know if it was good to watch it or not, but I'm about done looking at all of it. I relive all those feelings of doom and sadness again.
I feel for those folks who lost loved ones and hope they have some peace in their life now about those events.