but i'm healthier!
Computer troubles (and impending doooooom of yet another visit to the parents) aside, I'm actually pretty content right now. It's a boring life, but it's not bad. My schedule is ridiculously upside down, I'm lucky if I make it to bed an hour before dawn (kinda really- I'm usually up until 5, and sleep a large chunk of the day away).
When I moved back I lost 20 pounds...because I'm not eating total crap. (I'm really extremely super lucky and I know it- I have a pretty damn great metabolism, even if it did slow down in my 20s so I couldn't get away with eating fast food, doritos, hostess cupcakes, and an army of cokes a day anymore and not gain any weight at all.) The parents "never know what to do" for lunch, so we ended up eating out at fast food places most of the time, lots of fried crap. And too much wheat- pizza (because I wanted the coke delivery one night while sick and it being all cloudy out still and I really didn't want to go out in it) that I ate for the past week or so for dinner aside, no wheat in meals (meals themselves are really really boring- but quick, easy, and I don't actually have a problem with eating the same things every day), no processed junk generally. Except for my sins, which are somewhat copious and horrible, I'll admit it right now, I have a shitty relationship with food. I'll buy one sin when I go to the grocery store, and then I'll eat like half that box of cookies in one day. And that's WITH willpower and trying not to eat the entire box in one sitting. Right this moment I have a sugar easter egg that I've eaten half of tonight because I remembered I had it locked up and I felt the lure of something sweet and horrid for me and I'm really REALLY trying not to eat the other half right this very moment. In between meals _otherwise_ I'm all high protein lunch meats and eggs and imitation crab. Overall, I actually feel a lot better eating like this, and no longer am constantly struggling to NOT be bulimic. No, not intentionally, just...well. Most food makes me want to throw up because it's poison, cutting out all the excess junk has settled my stomach a fair bit. (I mostly only _actually_ puke for certain things I avoid like the plague- this is why I don't eat Indian or Thai food, and I avoid most Mexican.) I've on and off cut out the cokes, I occasionally cave for the headache relief, and then buy way too many, and if they're around I drink them until they aren't any more (but a max of 2 a day, instead of a minimum of 3, at least). Drinking lots of water, and some fruit juice instead. So long as I don't go too overboard, I can get away with eating crap as a special occasion thing (like, oh, leaving the house! Because that actually is a special occasion, ha) and it doesn't bother me as much.
Downside to this is I no longer have any ass to hold up my pants! And I've been having to figure out which pants I can even WEAR now without falling off. I'm happy with the lack of boobage that has resulted as well though- I can fit in my comfy bras that they don't make anymore again. I love and respect all my well endowed friends, and I love that you have boob pride, but I've always found them to mostly be a hassle. Occasionally painful, sometimes in the way, and generally a nuisance, so I'm fine with being back to barely capable of filling out a bra.
I've been exercising too...kinda. You know, I'm getting "old" so I should try to take care of myself or some junk. I've always hated exercise, I was thrilled when my second high school didn't have PE. Every other day (in theory) I take a 15 minute walk out here- which for all but the 3 people who've actually been here, I live on the top of a mountain. It's hilly up here- it's up, then down, then up again, so it's not a bad workout. I slacked off for the past couple of weeks while sick though...which was good because those days it was also moist (sorry Broken) and at least one of those days it would have hailed on me because I stood near the door right after deciding not to walk and, oh crap, that's actually some reasonable sized hail there (and whenever I go to visit them, because I'm not as keen on walking there, I did it a bit but the weather, ugh- and when they come visit me). My right leg has been telling me to fuck off since the day before yesterday, my first day walking again, so today I didn't go quite as far as usual. I'm not good with things that require doing over and over- eating, sleeping, doing laundry, let me do something once and cool, but I've always hated doing things that would just have to be done again.
When I moved back I lost 20 pounds...because I'm not eating total crap. (I'm really extremely super lucky and I know it- I have a pretty damn great metabolism, even if it did slow down in my 20s so I couldn't get away with eating fast food, doritos, hostess cupcakes, and an army of cokes a day anymore and not gain any weight at all.) The parents "never know what to do" for lunch, so we ended up eating out at fast food places most of the time, lots of fried crap. And too much wheat- pizza (because I wanted the coke delivery one night while sick and it being all cloudy out still and I really didn't want to go out in it) that I ate for the past week or so for dinner aside, no wheat in meals (meals themselves are really really boring- but quick, easy, and I don't actually have a problem with eating the same things every day), no processed junk generally. Except for my sins, which are somewhat copious and horrible, I'll admit it right now, I have a shitty relationship with food. I'll buy one sin when I go to the grocery store, and then I'll eat like half that box of cookies in one day. And that's WITH willpower and trying not to eat the entire box in one sitting. Right this moment I have a sugar easter egg that I've eaten half of tonight because I remembered I had it locked up and I felt the lure of something sweet and horrid for me and I'm really REALLY trying not to eat the other half right this very moment. In between meals _otherwise_ I'm all high protein lunch meats and eggs and imitation crab. Overall, I actually feel a lot better eating like this, and no longer am constantly struggling to NOT be bulimic. No, not intentionally, just...well. Most food makes me want to throw up because it's poison, cutting out all the excess junk has settled my stomach a fair bit. (I mostly only _actually_ puke for certain things I avoid like the plague- this is why I don't eat Indian or Thai food, and I avoid most Mexican.) I've on and off cut out the cokes, I occasionally cave for the headache relief, and then buy way too many, and if they're around I drink them until they aren't any more (but a max of 2 a day, instead of a minimum of 3, at least). Drinking lots of water, and some fruit juice instead. So long as I don't go too overboard, I can get away with eating crap as a special occasion thing (like, oh, leaving the house! Because that actually is a special occasion, ha) and it doesn't bother me as much.
Downside to this is I no longer have any ass to hold up my pants! And I've been having to figure out which pants I can even WEAR now without falling off. I'm happy with the lack of boobage that has resulted as well though- I can fit in my comfy bras that they don't make anymore again. I love and respect all my well endowed friends, and I love that you have boob pride, but I've always found them to mostly be a hassle. Occasionally painful, sometimes in the way, and generally a nuisance, so I'm fine with being back to barely capable of filling out a bra.
I've been exercising too...kinda. You know, I'm getting "old" so I should try to take care of myself or some junk. I've always hated exercise, I was thrilled when my second high school didn't have PE. Every other day (in theory) I take a 15 minute walk out here- which for all but the 3 people who've actually been here, I live on the top of a mountain. It's hilly up here- it's up, then down, then up again, so it's not a bad workout. I slacked off for the past couple of weeks while sick though...which was good because those days it was also moist (sorry Broken) and at least one of those days it would have hailed on me because I stood near the door right after deciding not to walk and, oh crap, that's actually some reasonable sized hail there (and whenever I go to visit them, because I'm not as keen on walking there, I did it a bit but the weather, ugh- and when they come visit me). My right leg has been telling me to fuck off since the day before yesterday, my first day walking again, so today I didn't go quite as far as usual. I'm not good with things that require doing over and over- eating, sleeping, doing laundry, let me do something once and cool, but I've always hated doing things that would just have to be done again.