(no subject)
how do things evolve. im not talking about pokemon where everything is based on EXP, moonstones, firestones, rare candies, etc, etc. im talking about how a fucking weed evolves into a bright, colorful flower with huge petals. or how an ostrich has a long neck so it can bury its shame in the ground. or how a woman can bear great big fallopian tubes. what triggers that evolution?
what if you were asleep for what seemed like an entire life and you woke up to find yourself in a shitty predicament. im talking about you wake up and you have a choke-ball in your mouth and your legs are over your head. you would be fucked.
what if no one else were real.
what if the only reason that this question has been asked before is because everyone, and therefore, all thoughts were a figment of your ultimate imagination.
what if you were a bear?
why does bear mace exist? fucking useless.
so benton is nineteen years old and hes still living with his parents in their lavish estate. theres really no reason for him to leave, until one say, he finds in his pocket a parcel. a large parcel. at first, benton is confounded at the notion of fitting such a large parcel in his tiny pocket. he uses the remaining crayons he possessed from his earlier coloring affair to write out a long, long formula, determined to find a solution to this perilous peril. Perrill, his good chap then enters the room to find his good mate playing with crayons beside an unopened parcel of megalithic proportions. this reminds him of stonehenge, and he soon questions the validity of ancient man's capability to erect such a structure. he then extends this bout of skepticism and applies it to the great pyramids of egypt. and the sphinx. and the eifel tower. and the hanging gardens of babylon, which he spys upon through benton's window. and the south american pyramids. and mount rushmore. and st. petersberg. and cape town. and allentown, pennsylvania.
"BY JOVE" exclaimed Allen, a 37 year old bentonsville resident. allen then proceeded to the kitchen, opening the third drawer right of the bottom half of the stove. "what a lovely oven." allen thinks to himself...or so he believes.
23,905,209,385 miles away, in a laboratory on an undisclosed planet in the alpha centari system, a Kerlektaklasmarnoldpalmertrigon reads Allen's mind. however, allen then blows his brains out with a laser pistol...the same pistol in the Kerlektaklasmarnoldpalmertrigon's holster.
And the wild west was never tamed.
THE END.
what if you were asleep for what seemed like an entire life and you woke up to find yourself in a shitty predicament. im talking about you wake up and you have a choke-ball in your mouth and your legs are over your head. you would be fucked.
what if no one else were real.
what if the only reason that this question has been asked before is because everyone, and therefore, all thoughts were a figment of your ultimate imagination.
what if you were a bear?
why does bear mace exist? fucking useless.
so benton is nineteen years old and hes still living with his parents in their lavish estate. theres really no reason for him to leave, until one say, he finds in his pocket a parcel. a large parcel. at first, benton is confounded at the notion of fitting such a large parcel in his tiny pocket. he uses the remaining crayons he possessed from his earlier coloring affair to write out a long, long formula, determined to find a solution to this perilous peril. Perrill, his good chap then enters the room to find his good mate playing with crayons beside an unopened parcel of megalithic proportions. this reminds him of stonehenge, and he soon questions the validity of ancient man's capability to erect such a structure. he then extends this bout of skepticism and applies it to the great pyramids of egypt. and the sphinx. and the eifel tower. and the hanging gardens of babylon, which he spys upon through benton's window. and the south american pyramids. and mount rushmore. and st. petersberg. and cape town. and allentown, pennsylvania.
"BY JOVE" exclaimed Allen, a 37 year old bentonsville resident. allen then proceeded to the kitchen, opening the third drawer right of the bottom half of the stove. "what a lovely oven." allen thinks to himself...or so he believes.
23,905,209,385 miles away, in a laboratory on an undisclosed planet in the alpha centari system, a Kerlektaklasmarnoldpalmertrigon reads Allen's mind. however, allen then blows his brains out with a laser pistol...the same pistol in the Kerlektaklasmarnoldpalmertrigon's holster.
And the wild west was never tamed.
THE END.