today would have been the best birthday, but i will remember today as if it were

[godssoldier]

how can i deny what i know to be truth?
everytime up to this point i had to convince myself it was true
and inside i new it wasnt
but now i dont have a single doubt

there are somethings im not ment to understand
i need to start looking outside of myself

and stop putting God in my box
maybe then my relationship with Him will be fixed.

but first her

i used to try to think before i talked
i still thought i did
aparently not
i assume too much in what other peoples responses will be

love

my heart reads your soul everytime i look into your eyes
and thats where i get my truth from

to cry would be an honorable thing now

I DONT EXPECT ANYONE TO UNDERSTAND THIS JOURNAL. its not really for anyone to read, its just for me to sort things out