MORE things you never thought you'd say.
Things you say as a parent that you never thought you'd say.
1. Seriously. Don't eat things you find on your butt.
2. Now you have the cleanest tushee in all the land!
3. Please don't kiss the kitty's butt. You should kiss her head instead. No, really. Don't kiss the kitty's butt. NO!
4. Yes, that's your penis. Yes, that's your penis. Yes, that's your penis. Yes, that's your penis. Yes. that's a penis. No, mommy doesn't have one. Yes, that's your penis. Penis. no, mommy doesn't ahve one. Nope, truck doesn't have one either. no, trucks don't have penises. Yes. Penis. Yes. *sigh* Penis. Penis. Yeah, that's your penis. No, Blue doesn't have one. penis. Penis! yes, that's a penis! no, Pic doesn't have one. Pic's a girl. no, Pic doesn't need yours, she's all good, but it was nice of you to try to share. Wow! Look! You're PEEING with your penis! no, don't play with the pee. no, don't play with the pee. NO, don't play with the PEE. Ok, how about if we find you some pants now?
5. Listen. I don't have any cheerios. you can cry and whine and throw a fit until next month, and I still won't have any cheerios. CHILL.
6. It's really OK that mommy's shirt doesn't have any trucks. Really. Noah's got enough trucks for everyone in the whole house.
7. yes, that's your penis. where are your pants?
8. thank you very much for bringing me your dirty diaper. That's very good that you knew it was dirty. But next time, don't take it off for mommy. Let mommy do it. yes, that's a penis.
9. yes. penis. yours. penis. yep. still a penis.
10. no, Blue doesn't have a penis.
11. I don't know. Steve might have a penis.
12. please don't put your truck down your pants.
13. Please don't put the crayons in your pants.
14. yes, that's a penis. no, mommy still doesn't have one.
15. don't put the book in your pants.
16. Seriously, what's the obsession with putting things in your pants?
17. penis. got it.
18. Mailboxes don't come in the house. no, mailboxes don't have penises.
Oh, and in case you didn't figure it out from this list, Noah's discovered his penis. There's A LOT of discovering the penis. A lot. And I have said the word penis more in the past 24 hours than I have in my whole life up until now. HEY quarblotz! penisvitch. Penisvitch penisvitch? penisvitch! Penisvitch penisvitch penisvitch.
1. Seriously. Don't eat things you find on your butt.
2. Now you have the cleanest tushee in all the land!
3. Please don't kiss the kitty's butt. You should kiss her head instead. No, really. Don't kiss the kitty's butt. NO!
4. Yes, that's your penis. Yes, that's your penis. Yes, that's your penis. Yes, that's your penis. Yes. that's a penis. No, mommy doesn't have one. Yes, that's your penis. Penis. no, mommy doesn't ahve one. Nope, truck doesn't have one either. no, trucks don't have penises. Yes. Penis. Yes. *sigh* Penis. Penis. Yeah, that's your penis. No, Blue doesn't have one. penis. Penis! yes, that's a penis! no, Pic doesn't have one. Pic's a girl. no, Pic doesn't need yours, she's all good, but it was nice of you to try to share. Wow! Look! You're PEEING with your penis! no, don't play with the pee. no, don't play with the pee. NO, don't play with the PEE. Ok, how about if we find you some pants now?
5. Listen. I don't have any cheerios. you can cry and whine and throw a fit until next month, and I still won't have any cheerios. CHILL.
6. It's really OK that mommy's shirt doesn't have any trucks. Really. Noah's got enough trucks for everyone in the whole house.
7. yes, that's your penis. where are your pants?
8. thank you very much for bringing me your dirty diaper. That's very good that you knew it was dirty. But next time, don't take it off for mommy. Let mommy do it. yes, that's a penis.
9. yes. penis. yours. penis. yep. still a penis.
10. no, Blue doesn't have a penis.
11. I don't know. Steve might have a penis.
12. please don't put your truck down your pants.
13. Please don't put the crayons in your pants.
14. yes, that's a penis. no, mommy still doesn't have one.
15. don't put the book in your pants.
16. Seriously, what's the obsession with putting things in your pants?
17. penis. got it.
18. Mailboxes don't come in the house. no, mailboxes don't have penises.
Oh, and in case you didn't figure it out from this list, Noah's discovered his penis. There's A LOT of discovering the penis. A lot. And I have said the word penis more in the past 24 hours than I have in my whole life up until now. HEY quarblotz! penisvitch. Penisvitch penisvitch? penisvitch! Penisvitch penisvitch penisvitch.