Must work on forumlating a lucrative ponzi scheme
Due to my car and its incessant demands for expensive repairs (how can a seatbelt just die?!) I agreed to participate in market research last weekend which apart from being well incentivised, was also an amusing experience in people observation.
It was obvious from the beginning that we had all been cast to fit a particular demographic and I was there featuring as the "OMGWTFBBQ-Gen-Y-female-obsessed-with-fashion-clubbing-and-Twitter". I abhor clubbing. I like to stay at home, listen to gay disco music and bake cakes. Fashion, well, I like hats and giant bows, but they're not particularly "on-trend" either... I have a Twitter account, but I only use it to stalk journalists and authors, not Lady GaGa. Overall, not entirely sure I was the person they wanted.
Also sitting around the discussion table were:
Stephen- an aging hippy who owned some kind of shonky, online car business.
Denise- a haughty, middle-aged sourpuss-come-nail technician who complained that nobody would take her seriously because her voice is so breathy and child-like.
Chris- a cocky Gen Y male who I felt compelled to punch in the face numerous times because he kept wanking off about his iPhone and his "awesome customer service job at McDonalds". Flipping burgers- woo!
An Indian- possibly named Kumar, Sanjeev or Vishnu. I have no idea, but if you can imagine the Little Britain sketches between Marjorie and Meera at Fat Fighters, that was exactly what happened.
Eryn- a Kiwi that seemed quite normal for a Kiwi. Except for that 'y' in her name.
....and the co-ordinator, Katie, who has to be the most non-descript/insipid person I have ever met.
So, we all sat there for 2 hours like we were at the world's most awkward dinner party, except all we had to eat were some dehydrated sandwiches. The company we were giving feedback on was a mobile phone service provider and we each had to give our opinion on various aspects of customer service. The phone service provider in question has the most appalling customer service imaginable, so I wasted no time in spitting venom. We were then asked to view an advertisement which honestly looked like an ad for phone sex complete with a tangle of naked limbs and pillows. When told to write down our "first impressions" of the ad, that is what I wrote. Apparently, that was not the correct answer and the very conservative Denise and Sanjeev recoiled in horror. The session ended shortly after that as did my futue in market research, I suspect.