no_going_home Illyria
The years have slowly drifted past like leaves in still water. For me, a goddess, the time moves slower for me than it does for others. I still am a goddess, though I don't let others see this side of myself. I walk around this world, the face of Winifred Burkle smiling and laughing and speaking in the place of one of the greatest gods to walk the planes of existence. But I still watch and listen and observe the humans, demons, half breeds and every other creature on this planet with the eyes of Illyria. I am still inside this face, this smile...this facade. I don't show myself unless provoked and even then, it's but a shadow of my former self. My former glory has faded just as the lives of former champions faded long ago.
Champions. Champions would always come and go, like so many things do, but one would always be with me. Wesley. Wesley was my guide for a short time and my first encounter with true human feelings. I hadn't understood them then, ten years ago. It's almost like it's yesterday for me. I can still see his face as he lay in my arms dying, blood pouring from his chest. I had lied for him then, to ease his passing, but even then he knew. Even in his death, he could not keep up the pretense. "I miss you," he'd said. Such a small thing, something I didn't even notice until years later when I a better understanding of grammar. He said 'miss' because he knew that it was still me under her face. Yet, he died not knowing that the tears were mine. He died not knowing that I avenged his death. I made a promise to myself then, that I didn't realize until years later: I would continue his work.
After years of wandering aimlessly, with no direction I stumbled upon Spike. He was broken and grieving for his fallen slayer and we formed a partnership. But it was the promise I didn't know existed that caused Spike and I to band together and help those in need. He has been a good guide to me and has taught me well. I am able to blend in with society better than real humans. But it is when we are fighting, what does he call it? the good fight, pet that I wear my true face. Then and only then do I feel like I am comfortable in the skin that houses my essence. Even though he is human now, Spike couldn't make a better champion if he tried. He does the names Wesley, Angel, Buffy, Gunn, Fred and so many others justice. We fight for the fallen warriors, we fight for those that need fighting for and we fight for ourselves. Because when we fight, we are finally being true to our very nature.
Spike told me that during the day light hours I should find something to occupy my time. He called this a 'job'. He said this job I was to find should be something I enjoyed doing. At the time I'd asked him if I could find a job killing the evil of the world. He'd told me, with a smile that I could, but I wouldn't get paid for my time and efforts. After a number of discussions, I was able to grasp the concept of a job and working. So, I found a job, applied as Winifred Burkle and became a reporter for a newspaper. Wesley always told me I was inspiring and Spike told me I had a way with words. So with my knowledge of this world I found something that I could put my 'talents', such as they were, to use as a freelance reporter.
I enjoyed being a reporter, but I enjoyed the hunt, the kill, and the slaughter at night. I often went out without Spike. I would find a nest of vampires and eradicate them within minutes. But, the more I wore the face of Fred and used her emotions, the more I craved the attention one received for saving a life in need. And so I would seek out those in need, with or without Spike, mostly with, and save a life. And this was how things were going in my life. I was a goddess living in the body of a human. I wrote articles during the day and killed evil crawling things at night. It was not the life I envisioned for myself, but it was better than rotting and stinking in the ground.
Champions. Champions would always come and go, like so many things do, but one would always be with me. Wesley. Wesley was my guide for a short time and my first encounter with true human feelings. I hadn't understood them then, ten years ago. It's almost like it's yesterday for me. I can still see his face as he lay in my arms dying, blood pouring from his chest. I had lied for him then, to ease his passing, but even then he knew. Even in his death, he could not keep up the pretense. "I miss you," he'd said. Such a small thing, something I didn't even notice until years later when I a better understanding of grammar. He said 'miss' because he knew that it was still me under her face. Yet, he died not knowing that the tears were mine. He died not knowing that I avenged his death. I made a promise to myself then, that I didn't realize until years later: I would continue his work.
After years of wandering aimlessly, with no direction I stumbled upon Spike. He was broken and grieving for his fallen slayer and we formed a partnership. But it was the promise I didn't know existed that caused Spike and I to band together and help those in need. He has been a good guide to me and has taught me well. I am able to blend in with society better than real humans. But it is when we are fighting, what does he call it? the good fight, pet that I wear my true face. Then and only then do I feel like I am comfortable in the skin that houses my essence. Even though he is human now, Spike couldn't make a better champion if he tried. He does the names Wesley, Angel, Buffy, Gunn, Fred and so many others justice. We fight for the fallen warriors, we fight for those that need fighting for and we fight for ourselves. Because when we fight, we are finally being true to our very nature.
Spike told me that during the day light hours I should find something to occupy my time. He called this a 'job'. He said this job I was to find should be something I enjoyed doing. At the time I'd asked him if I could find a job killing the evil of the world. He'd told me, with a smile that I could, but I wouldn't get paid for my time and efforts. After a number of discussions, I was able to grasp the concept of a job and working. So, I found a job, applied as Winifred Burkle and became a reporter for a newspaper. Wesley always told me I was inspiring and Spike told me I had a way with words. So with my knowledge of this world I found something that I could put my 'talents', such as they were, to use as a freelance reporter.
I enjoyed being a reporter, but I enjoyed the hunt, the kill, and the slaughter at night. I often went out without Spike. I would find a nest of vampires and eradicate them within minutes. But, the more I wore the face of Fred and used her emotions, the more I craved the attention one received for saving a life in need. And so I would seek out those in need, with or without Spike, mostly with, and save a life. And this was how things were going in my life. I was a goddess living in the body of a human. I wrote articles during the day and killed evil crawling things at night. It was not the life I envisioned for myself, but it was better than rotting and stinking in the ground.