DRAMA
I am feeling blah. I don't quite know why. I have a lot of personal issues going on around me that I feel very strongly about, but since they aren't "MY" issues, I feel, I guess you could say helpless? The biggest and most pressing issue is, A friend of mine, that I have known since I was 10-11, he daughter is living with her dad out of the town we live in. She has not seen her daughter in 5 months. The relationship she has with her mom and dad is I guess you could say non-existent. (Her dad disowned her for letting the daughter go and live with her father. There is a ton of drama around this.) And her mom follows suit to what the dad does so even if she sees her mom it is completely strained. Well my friend had a baby not that long ago and made choices that made that situation worse. (l didn't think it could be) And that ended up straining the relationship with the one family member in town that she was talking to.. I thought at the time, that although she made poor choices in what she did it was forgivable at the time. I mean you can be forgiving for things when you have a really good reason like you are pushing a huge bowling ball out your vagina. So her and her brother patched things up pretty good, things were still strained b/c she didn't take any accountability for her part in it. And her brother basically said I am going to let bygones be bygones so we can have some sort of relationship back. Well to make a long story long, friends mom got friends daughter for a visit. In the 5 months that daughter has been living with dad nobody in the family has seen her not even mom, friends mom schedules with friend and friends brother for mom to see daughter with or without friends mom present. Friends daughter is really excited to see mom and sister and new baby brother, basic gist of the story is friend doesn't show, doesn't call, and the only thing she really has to say for herself is she is too stressed to deal with it.
NOW I think that she has some postpartum depression. But at the same time, I am getting tired of making excuses for her, every
time she tells me something and then doesn't follow through she is making me out to be a liar and ....basically I know how her daughter feels. My bio-dad did that to me. I would sit and wait for him for hours, on pins and needles and have him not show up. A child does not understand this. A child feels to blame. A child doesn't deserve this. I don't know how she is going to fix this. I know this isn't mine to fix and I know that she has to fix it on her own. But I am having a hard time compartmentalizing my emotions so that I don't take out on friend my feelings of how shitty it is that she did this. I know she is going to need support while she is dealing with all this and she has alienated most of her family.... (I think she has done this because of her new husband but that is a whole other story)
I think I just need to runaway..... AGAIN
NOW I think that she has some postpartum depression. But at the same time, I am getting tired of making excuses for her, every
time she tells me something and then doesn't follow through she is making me out to be a liar and ....basically I know how her daughter feels. My bio-dad did that to me. I would sit and wait for him for hours, on pins and needles and have him not show up. A child does not understand this. A child feels to blame. A child doesn't deserve this. I don't know how she is going to fix this. I know this isn't mine to fix and I know that she has to fix it on her own. But I am having a hard time compartmentalizing my emotions so that I don't take out on friend my feelings of how shitty it is that she did this. I know she is going to need support while she is dealing with all this and she has alienated most of her family.... (I think she has done this because of her new husband but that is a whole other story)
I think I just need to runaway..... AGAIN