Sweetie? This has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with you; it has everything to do with her. She strikes out and hurts you because this way she can get some reaction; SHE hurts, so SOMEONE has to pay, and if SHE cannot wail to the sky, then by goddess, SOMEONE has to, and dear my heart, sadly, it has been you this time.
I know, that doesn't help right now, but it will later. I lived this for seventeen YEARS, and I had to learn that no, you didn't do wrong, and NO, there was nothing on earth you could hve done to change what she said and did. You were fine, you are good, and wonderful, and smart, and pretty, and able to live on your own-- you love her, and you want her to see you as everyone else sees you and the fact she refuses to see the jewel she has before her HURTS.
Cry as much as you need to-- pain needs expressing, but understand, dear one, that you are not what she has said, and understand that she will be as she is, and do what you can WHEN YOU CAN to put some distance, remembering that you can love someone at a distance, even if it is a mental one.
I know, that doesn't help right now, but it will later. I lived this for seventeen YEARS, and I had to learn that no, you didn't do wrong, and NO, there was nothing on earth you could hve done to change what she said and did. You were fine, you are good, and wonderful, and smart, and pretty, and able to live on your own-- you love her, and you want her to see you as everyone else sees you and the fact she refuses to see the jewel she has before her HURTS.
Cry as much as you need to-- pain needs expressing, but understand, dear one, that you are not what she has said, and understand that she will be as she is, and do what you can WHEN YOU CAN to put some distance, remembering that you can love someone at a distance, even if it is a mental one.
::huge warm hug::
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