lifes ups and downs
well i am supposed to be getting a new car soon... but there are some things holding up the process... because of being so close to the weekend my anut couldn't talk with the banks about a loan for my car so she has to wait till later today to find out also because i am paying for it and it is 16,000 i told the dealer i wanted green so one has to be shipped up from southern ohio somewhere, worst of all this damn car is fucking up my love life... i wouldn't be surprised if she hates me and found another guy to talk to... i was going to call her today but i was so mad at everything that i didn't want to risk crying or yelling at her...i love marie and she knows it... i just turn out to be a very bad boyfriend somehow. i always try so hard to make girls happy it never works out i say just live life don't try to make anyone happy but yourself or they will hate you... now i have 2morrow nite off but i guess that marie is going to the movies with her cousins that outta be good for her... she needs to get out more without me being around... i can telll her parents are getting tired of me... she is rarely allowed to go anywhere anymore it is sad because i care for her more then myself... at times i wish she would have done what everyone of her friends told her to do and that is to dump me, maybe then she would have a happier life.... bunch of malarkey? you tell me