(no subject)
So, allow me to muse on the topic of threesomes...
Well, to be honest with you, they don't appeal to me...at all. There are a lot of reasons why they don't appeal to me, so allow me to give some insight. First of all, I guess I should preface this with saying that I couldn't really care less if other people do them. I mean, whatever floats your boat man, I don't like to judge. That being said, I just don't really think they are for me. For me, sex is about love and trust. It is important for me to have strong feelings for someone before I even think about jumping into bed with them. I mean, if I didn't feel this way, there would be no way I would have ended up a 21 year old virgin. Trust would also be that other magical element. I have to really trust a person before I even get naked in front of them, let alone share an experience as intimate as sex. I've only had one sexual partner and with all of our talk about marriage, it has led me to consider the fact that he may be the only person I ever sleep with. I've come to the conclusion that not only does this fact not bother me, I'd actually prefer it that way. He's the only one I can picture myself having sex with and the only one I want to have sex with. I don't fantasize about anyone else and this doesn't bother me at all. He's the only one I want. Yes, it was only recently that I realized that I thought I was bisexual. I basically decided that I was open to the idea of dating either a man or a woman, because I thought they were both pretty cool and I didn't want to miss out on dating a great person by being closed minded. I just wanted to meet the person of my dreams. And then I did. And he was a man. But, that doesn't really mean I'm dying to sleep with a woman either. I'm really kind of indifferent. It sounded fun at one point, but now that I'm happy and in a relationship, I don't really think about it much anymore. I'd say another reason why I wouldn't be into it would be the fact that I am incredibly insecure. I'd say at this point in my life, I've reached the highest level of confidence that I have ever felt, but really, that is not saying much at all. I still am known to slip into that "I'm fat, I'm ugly, I can't believe someone actually wants me" line of thinking. And, when you are a girl who thinks your man can do way better in the looks department, you really don't want to get into a sexual encounter involving you, him, and someone who is probably way better looking and in way better shape than you are. That would have disastrous effects on my self-esteem I'm sure and would have the potential to set me back years (since it has took me years to build up self-esteem in the first place). I would say at the very basic elements, the key to an enjoyable experience would be three willing and excited participants. Nothing about that experience turns me on when I think about how it would go. Fumbling through my first, awkward sexual experience with a woman in front of an audience does not sound very appealing, never mind the fact that having a sexual experience with anyone besides my boyfriend doesn't sound appealing, no matter what the context. I can't even bear the thought of watching my boyfriend with someone else...I think it would be devastating to me. I just don't think I could emotionally handle a situation like that. I'm too fragile and insecure. I feel like if I ever did find myself in that situation, it would be to make someone else happy, which is a bad idea, I believe. I just can't compromise what I feel and believe and place myself in a situation I know could hurt me. But at the same time, I feel bad. I feel like I am being selfish somehow. I just feel like this: I am so happy right now. I am happier than I have ever been before. My relationship is amazing and I have that fear inside of me that something might change. I don't want to jeopardize our relationship because it means so much to me. From my perspective, a threesome would not be healthy for my relationship. But, am I jeopardizing my relationship by holding out and not being adventurous enough or am I just worrying too much?
Well, to be honest with you, they don't appeal to me...at all. There are a lot of reasons why they don't appeal to me, so allow me to give some insight. First of all, I guess I should preface this with saying that I couldn't really care less if other people do them. I mean, whatever floats your boat man, I don't like to judge. That being said, I just don't really think they are for me. For me, sex is about love and trust. It is important for me to have strong feelings for someone before I even think about jumping into bed with them. I mean, if I didn't feel this way, there would be no way I would have ended up a 21 year old virgin. Trust would also be that other magical element. I have to really trust a person before I even get naked in front of them, let alone share an experience as intimate as sex. I've only had one sexual partner and with all of our talk about marriage, it has led me to consider the fact that he may be the only person I ever sleep with. I've come to the conclusion that not only does this fact not bother me, I'd actually prefer it that way. He's the only one I can picture myself having sex with and the only one I want to have sex with. I don't fantasize about anyone else and this doesn't bother me at all. He's the only one I want. Yes, it was only recently that I realized that I thought I was bisexual. I basically decided that I was open to the idea of dating either a man or a woman, because I thought they were both pretty cool and I didn't want to miss out on dating a great person by being closed minded. I just wanted to meet the person of my dreams. And then I did. And he was a man. But, that doesn't really mean I'm dying to sleep with a woman either. I'm really kind of indifferent. It sounded fun at one point, but now that I'm happy and in a relationship, I don't really think about it much anymore. I'd say another reason why I wouldn't be into it would be the fact that I am incredibly insecure. I'd say at this point in my life, I've reached the highest level of confidence that I have ever felt, but really, that is not saying much at all. I still am known to slip into that "I'm fat, I'm ugly, I can't believe someone actually wants me" line of thinking. And, when you are a girl who thinks your man can do way better in the looks department, you really don't want to get into a sexual encounter involving you, him, and someone who is probably way better looking and in way better shape than you are. That would have disastrous effects on my self-esteem I'm sure and would have the potential to set me back years (since it has took me years to build up self-esteem in the first place). I would say at the very basic elements, the key to an enjoyable experience would be three willing and excited participants. Nothing about that experience turns me on when I think about how it would go. Fumbling through my first, awkward sexual experience with a woman in front of an audience does not sound very appealing, never mind the fact that having a sexual experience with anyone besides my boyfriend doesn't sound appealing, no matter what the context. I can't even bear the thought of watching my boyfriend with someone else...I think it would be devastating to me. I just don't think I could emotionally handle a situation like that. I'm too fragile and insecure. I feel like if I ever did find myself in that situation, it would be to make someone else happy, which is a bad idea, I believe. I just can't compromise what I feel and believe and place myself in a situation I know could hurt me. But at the same time, I feel bad. I feel like I am being selfish somehow. I just feel like this: I am so happy right now. I am happier than I have ever been before. My relationship is amazing and I have that fear inside of me that something might change. I don't want to jeopardize our relationship because it means so much to me. From my perspective, a threesome would not be healthy for my relationship. But, am I jeopardizing my relationship by holding out and not being adventurous enough or am I just worrying too much?