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[glortw]

So yesterday I made a deal with my mom, because like I want to come to her house on weekends--she has food, and Baby. So she said she'd come pick me up, but I had to go with her to the Bruce Springsteen exhibit at the National Constitution Center. I had something else I'd wanted to try to do that evening, but it turned out of COURSE she gave the

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[glortw]

I worked at my job over a year. I quit once it became impossible for me to continue. One must do it when one CAN, but when a physician and other experts have deemed it impossible, one must simply try to work on one's mental health, and in the meantime wait for Social Security to approve their claim, and do positive things for their mental health.

Obviously, if we didn't have any food or money for food, we would not have gone. This was a very special exhibit for us and something we wouldn't have another chance to see, and we would have been very sad if we'd missed it. Had it been a choice between food and it, obviously we would've chosen food. But I think maybe when your life is perfect, than you can dictate how others should spend whatever money they have. Have you never done anything just because you wanted to, not because it was integral to your survival? My mom spends 99% of her money on food, bills, cat food, toilet paper, paper towels, dish soap, gas, things like that. She never does anything fun. This was the one thing that it meant a lot for her to attend, and I'm glad she did. It's very Republican and unsympathetic to poor people to say they should never have any fun because they're poor. They should try to have as much fun as possible, because it's much, much harder.

[glortw]

Physicians and other "experts" in the mental health industry would be unemployed if they did not have people to deem "unable" to work. You did not quit your job because it became "impossible" to continue; you quit your job because you felt you shouldn't have to work.
Struggling to surive is a bitch, no doubt about it. But you need to learn how to set priorities in your life. During times of adversity, you may have to sacrifice going to a Springsteen exhibit in favor of saving what little cash you have. There will be another exhibit later, when you are in better financial shape.
Republicans do not think "poor" people should never have fun. On the contrary, clear-headed Republicans and Democrats believe that people who are receiving public assistance should be more careful with their money.

[glortw]

I do not think you get this--I didn't pay a cent for the exhibit. I don't have a cent, at all.

And you obviously haven't been to a psychiatrist lately. They make a career of helping people and putting them on medications that may help them. But they are very, very loath to ever deem someone unable to work. You need to show evidence of serious problems that make you unable to function like a normal human being, which you seem to believe is impossible for someone whose problems are generally "just" mental.

It's not about money or how hard it is out there. It's about my brain which is BROKEN and maybe when I am dead, you and everyone else I know may finally grasp that.

[glortw]

You seem to feel as though you want to "prove" something to us.
Screw us. Forget about "proving" anything to us. You're intelligent enough to prove to YOURSELF that you can and will make it in this world. Look out for No. 1. Your brain is not broken. It's just being tested now, but once you break out of this cycle of despair, everything will fall into place.
It all starts with getting a job and sticking with that job. There are jobs out there for you, and you CAN do it.

[glortw]

Your insistence that making it in this world starts with me getting a job is proof of how much you don't understand about me.
The first step is taking care of myself, mentally. The most important thing is to get into a better place emotionally and that is all that matters and all that I am able to or can focus on.

[glorsbiggestfan]

Glor! Freddy did not say he wants you dead. I would be emotionally dead if you killed yourself. I am glad that you write the lj so I can see what is happeniung in your life and how you are thinking and feeling.