Where did it go?!
I miss when I used to be able to sit down and just write for hours. Wether it be in here or in my regular journal. I feel like something was taken away from me. For some reason I just can't find anything in me to write anymore. It's not that I don't have problems or anything. I guess it's just that I've gotten so used to having problems that I no longer have to vent I guess. I've in some ways become a pro to just holding it all in. But I REALLY miss being able to just lay it all out there. Having the ABILITY to do that. To put my feelings into words without it feeling like a chore. My life is just so chaotic that I feel like I don't have time to THINK, much less write. I always say to myself that I'm going to start making an effort to write more often. And I actually DO sometimes. But it's like I pick up a pen and just draw a blank. I write about a whole wad of pointless shit. Like what happened to me on that particular day. It's more of something I force myself to do, as opposed to something I feel deeply compelled to do. I feel like I'm some 10 year old girl who's keeping a diary because it's the "cool" and "grown-up" thing to do.
I hope I get over it soon. I miss that part of myself. It was a huge part of who I was and am. GIVE IT BACK! :(
I hope I get over it soon. I miss that part of myself. It was a huge part of who I was and am. GIVE IT BACK! :(