Preview: Untitled - Rachel/Quinn, Lea/Dianna
Title: Untitled, as of now
Author: inanawfulmess
Rating: PG-13
Length: somewhere between 17,000 and 18,000, most likely.
Spoilers: Season One
Summary: There's something going on between Lea and Dianna that could lead to Glee being canceled. Can Rachel and Quinn help them work it out in order to save their own existences?
Author's Note: Obviously, I don't own anything. If I did, I probably wouldn't be sitting at home writing fan fiction.
Rachel Berry was nothing if not determined. When she had been just a toddler on the pageant circuit, her drive to win, while strong, paled in comparison to her drive to get her way. Her fathers always threatened to show any romantic interests she brought home to meet them the video of a two-year-old Rachel stomping off the stage because she was awarded her crown to the "Little Miss Western Ohio jingle" and not something she could sing to. The point, however, was that Rachel had been practicing determination (and the accompanying diva storm-out) for seventeen years and her perfection of the art had forced people to go along with her, even against all forces of better judgment and common sense.
“We’re going to the real world,” she declared in glee rehearsal. “Something is up and we’re going to fix it to save ourselves and the society we know and love.”
“You love a society that constantly throws slushies in your face, both metaphorically and literally?” Artie questioned.
“Well, not that part so much, but - “
Mercedes interrupted. “A society that continuously mocks you for your fashion sense and two gay dads?”
“I’ll have you know I love my fathers.”
“Dude, Berry, your mother didn’t even think you were worth it.” Rachel’s face fell and everyone knew Puck had taken it too far.
“Shut up, Puckerman,” Quinn hissed, too busy shooting a glare to notice the effect her words had on Rachel.
“I’m just not done here,” Rachel continued, brightening. “I have a lot to accomplish in this life that I haven’t had an opportunity for yet. I’d like my chance.”
“Like Broadway?” Tina asked.
“Well,” Rachel paused thoughtfully, “yes, but more important things too.” She rolled her eyes as her teammates gasped. “There is more to life than winning Tonys. I’m thinking something like true love.” The dreamy smile she directed in Quinn’s direction went largely unnoticed as the glee club either rolled their eyes at Rachel’s dramatics or began ribbing on Finn for not fitting the bill despite the fact he had been trying to get Rachel to agree to a relationship for weeks.
“Anyways,” Rachel directed the attention back toward herself, “I have done some extensive research and it seems to me that the proper course of action is for us to enter the real world to attempt to remedy any schisms within the cast that portrays us so that we can continue on in these lives unhindered. Our first task will be to fix any problems between Lea Michele and Dianna Agron such that they may continue to work together and both will sign on for the new season.”
“Hold up,” Mercedes interrupted, placing her hand up with her palm pointing toward Rachel. “How exactly are we supposed to get to this so-called ‘real world’?”
“Ah!” Rachel squealed. “I had a feeling someone might ask that. After many phone calls to different distant relatives who are blessed with the same gifts as I, I have determined that the easiest way to gain entry to the real world’s Hollywood is through The Real World: Hollywood.”
“Pardon?” Kurt asked.
“The MTV program. Surely you’re all familiar. We just need to crawl through the television when that program is airing and we’ll end up just where we want to be.”
“But wasn’t that like, eight seasons ago?” Santana asked.
“Yes,” Rachel conceded, “but we’re in luck! MTV frequently reruns episodes of that season and the next time it’s set to air is today at 4:00 PM, just after glee rehearsal!”
Artie cleared his throat. “I am not crashing my chair into some television set like I’m Harry Potter trying to catch a train.”
“Yeah, Rachel,” Tina added. “I’m sorry, but that idea is just insane.”
“I’ll go with you, Rach.”
Despite his sweet tone and puppy-dog expression, Rachel couldn’t help but turn him down. “While I appreciate your offer, Finn, I’m afraid I can’t accept. You see, much of the real world is ignorant to our existences, much as you all were to theirs until I enlightened you. I realize the idea that there are people who look exactly like you living in another realm can be hard to handle for some, and the news should be broken gently.”
“Oh, like you did for us?” Kurt asked.
Choosing to ignore his sarcasm, Rachel continued. “I do not wish to overwhelm our counterparts right off the bat, and therefore feel it would be most irresponsible of us to bombard the real world all at once. Therefore, may I propose that Quinn and I make the first trip together, as our counterparts appear to be at the center of the crisis, and others of you may follow as they become accustomed to our presence?”
“You’re nuts if you think Q’s gonna go with you, Berry,” Santana snapped with a roll of her eyes. “She’s not gonna run into a tv screen just to have you laugh at her when she falls on her ass.”
“I’ll go,” Quinn spoke quietly before Rachel had a chance to retort, surprising even herself.
“You’ll go?” Santana asked incredulously. “With Berry?”
“With me?” Rachel echoed in disbelief.
“Jeez, guys, it’s not that big a deal. Somebody’s got to be there to mock her when her plan fails. Besides,” Quinn said quietly now, turning to Santana and Brittany. “It’ll give me a chance alone with her to scare her away from Finn for a bit longer in case she’s thinking of finally giving in to him.”
Santana and Brittany nodded before Quinn stood and smoothed the wrinkles in her Cheerios skirt. “Alright, Man Hands, let’s blow out of here. We’ve only got half an hour before your show starts.”
Everyone in the glee club stared, mouths hanging open, as Rachel quickly grabbed her backpack and followed Quinn out of the room, not even pausing to suggest that they stay in rehearsal an extra fifteen minutes to work on their voices since Rachel’s house was only a five-minute walk away.
Author: inanawfulmess
Rating: PG-13
Length: somewhere between 17,000 and 18,000, most likely.
Spoilers: Season One
Summary: There's something going on between Lea and Dianna that could lead to Glee being canceled. Can Rachel and Quinn help them work it out in order to save their own existences?
Author's Note: Obviously, I don't own anything. If I did, I probably wouldn't be sitting at home writing fan fiction.
Rachel Berry was nothing if not determined. When she had been just a toddler on the pageant circuit, her drive to win, while strong, paled in comparison to her drive to get her way. Her fathers always threatened to show any romantic interests she brought home to meet them the video of a two-year-old Rachel stomping off the stage because she was awarded her crown to the "Little Miss Western Ohio jingle" and not something she could sing to. The point, however, was that Rachel had been practicing determination (and the accompanying diva storm-out) for seventeen years and her perfection of the art had forced people to go along with her, even against all forces of better judgment and common sense.
“We’re going to the real world,” she declared in glee rehearsal. “Something is up and we’re going to fix it to save ourselves and the society we know and love.”
“You love a society that constantly throws slushies in your face, both metaphorically and literally?” Artie questioned.
“Well, not that part so much, but - “
Mercedes interrupted. “A society that continuously mocks you for your fashion sense and two gay dads?”
“I’ll have you know I love my fathers.”
“Dude, Berry, your mother didn’t even think you were worth it.” Rachel’s face fell and everyone knew Puck had taken it too far.
“Shut up, Puckerman,” Quinn hissed, too busy shooting a glare to notice the effect her words had on Rachel.
“I’m just not done here,” Rachel continued, brightening. “I have a lot to accomplish in this life that I haven’t had an opportunity for yet. I’d like my chance.”
“Like Broadway?” Tina asked.
“Well,” Rachel paused thoughtfully, “yes, but more important things too.” She rolled her eyes as her teammates gasped. “There is more to life than winning Tonys. I’m thinking something like true love.” The dreamy smile she directed in Quinn’s direction went largely unnoticed as the glee club either rolled their eyes at Rachel’s dramatics or began ribbing on Finn for not fitting the bill despite the fact he had been trying to get Rachel to agree to a relationship for weeks.
“Anyways,” Rachel directed the attention back toward herself, “I have done some extensive research and it seems to me that the proper course of action is for us to enter the real world to attempt to remedy any schisms within the cast that portrays us so that we can continue on in these lives unhindered. Our first task will be to fix any problems between Lea Michele and Dianna Agron such that they may continue to work together and both will sign on for the new season.”
“Hold up,” Mercedes interrupted, placing her hand up with her palm pointing toward Rachel. “How exactly are we supposed to get to this so-called ‘real world’?”
“Ah!” Rachel squealed. “I had a feeling someone might ask that. After many phone calls to different distant relatives who are blessed with the same gifts as I, I have determined that the easiest way to gain entry to the real world’s Hollywood is through The Real World: Hollywood.”
“Pardon?” Kurt asked.
“The MTV program. Surely you’re all familiar. We just need to crawl through the television when that program is airing and we’ll end up just where we want to be.”
“But wasn’t that like, eight seasons ago?” Santana asked.
“Yes,” Rachel conceded, “but we’re in luck! MTV frequently reruns episodes of that season and the next time it’s set to air is today at 4:00 PM, just after glee rehearsal!”
Artie cleared his throat. “I am not crashing my chair into some television set like I’m Harry Potter trying to catch a train.”
“Yeah, Rachel,” Tina added. “I’m sorry, but that idea is just insane.”
“I’ll go with you, Rach.”
Despite his sweet tone and puppy-dog expression, Rachel couldn’t help but turn him down. “While I appreciate your offer, Finn, I’m afraid I can’t accept. You see, much of the real world is ignorant to our existences, much as you all were to theirs until I enlightened you. I realize the idea that there are people who look exactly like you living in another realm can be hard to handle for some, and the news should be broken gently.”
“Oh, like you did for us?” Kurt asked.
Choosing to ignore his sarcasm, Rachel continued. “I do not wish to overwhelm our counterparts right off the bat, and therefore feel it would be most irresponsible of us to bombard the real world all at once. Therefore, may I propose that Quinn and I make the first trip together, as our counterparts appear to be at the center of the crisis, and others of you may follow as they become accustomed to our presence?”
“You’re nuts if you think Q’s gonna go with you, Berry,” Santana snapped with a roll of her eyes. “She’s not gonna run into a tv screen just to have you laugh at her when she falls on her ass.”
“I’ll go,” Quinn spoke quietly before Rachel had a chance to retort, surprising even herself.
“You’ll go?” Santana asked incredulously. “With Berry?”
“With me?” Rachel echoed in disbelief.
“Jeez, guys, it’s not that big a deal. Somebody’s got to be there to mock her when her plan fails. Besides,” Quinn said quietly now, turning to Santana and Brittany. “It’ll give me a chance alone with her to scare her away from Finn for a bit longer in case she’s thinking of finally giving in to him.”
Santana and Brittany nodded before Quinn stood and smoothed the wrinkles in her Cheerios skirt. “Alright, Man Hands, let’s blow out of here. We’ve only got half an hour before your show starts.”
Everyone in the glee club stared, mouths hanging open, as Rachel quickly grabbed her backpack and followed Quinn out of the room, not even pausing to suggest that they stay in rehearsal an extra fifteen minutes to work on their voices since Rachel’s house was only a five-minute walk away.