Spirit Exchange Fic! I Keep My Distance but You Still Catch My Eye, for katherine_lupin
Holiday Wish Fulfilled for: katherine_lupin
Title:I Keep My Distance but You Still Catch My Eye
Rating: Pg-13
Pairings/Characters: Rachel Berry/Jesse St James, Mentions of New Directions
Warnings: Minor St. Berry Angst
Word count: 1,954
Disclaimer: This Glee fanfiction is based upon the television show of the same name. All characters and situations other than my own are sole property of Ryan Murphy Productions and 20th Century Fox Television.
Summary: Rachel’s started to like doing the unexpected.
A/N: I hope I met the prompters expectations. Beta'd by the awesome liquoricesky
Rachel Berry is not a very easy person to work with and she realizes this. Her ideas can many times be outrageously biased, her temper tantrums are a force to be reckoned with and her vengeful streak could put fear into any man. However, in this moment she could honestly say that she wasn’t in the wrong.
The glee club had been warming up to her recently however slowly, that much she could say. Like a comment Puck had made earlier in the month, “She’s like athlete’s foot, it kind of sucks to be around but eventually you just get used to it.” It seemed though, after she and Finn broke up, all progress had halted. What she had done was wrong, she understood that. In all honesty it was probably the worst thing she had done to a person (maybe sans one) but they had acted like she didn’t even have a right to be angry.
It had infuriated her. After all the grief she had gotten over baby gate, they had all acted like she didn’t have a right to be angry. It was deplorable, though she briefly remembers Mercedes and Quinn giving her a sheepish look of sympathy, she was furious.
Her protest of silence had started as a tactic to make Mr. Schuester see the error of his ways but after Sectionals were said and done it became a sort of respite from everything and everyone. She would go to Glee, sing her appointed solos and say nothing else.
At first it had thrown everyone for a loop but then gradually it became a joke. How long ‘til Berry cracks. The highest bid had been made for the day before Christmas break and it was money well spent because that’s exactly when it happened.
The club was having trouble finalizing songs for their scheduled chorale during the holidays and naturally Rachel was the go to for suggestions. Question after question went unanswered. Her usual, “Honestly the lack of initiative in this club is appalling, I would have finalized this list three months ago,” was caught on her tongue. She said nothing and of course the other members began to get irritated.
“Rachel come on; stop being such a drama queen.”
“Seriously we have to figure this out.”
“Listen hobbit, I know it may be hard to hear down there and all, but you need to start doing that annoying know it all thing you do so we can finish this.”
“That’s not all she does.”
That was the last straw.
Standing to address the club, Rachel had a plan. She was going to go straight into her well rehearsed spiel asking the glee club to respect her wishes on doing exactly what they always told her to, be quiet. That’s what she had planned to do. So when it comes out her mouth, brazen and confident, no one is more surprised than she.
“I quit.”
Silence took over the choir room as everyone, most of all Rachel, took in what was said.
Mr. Schuester was the first to speak, “Rachel, don’t you think that’s a little rash?”
“Bull, we’ve seen this before. Let her go Mr. Schue, she’ll be back.”
That steels her; get’s her thoughts together and snaps her out of her reverie.
Finn meets her gaze across the room before looking away.
Then Rachel makes another rash decision. She curtsies, just like she always imagined she would on opening night of her first starring role on Broadway, and leaves the room without a word.
As soon as the door closes behind her, Rachel’s sure she’s having a panic attack. She calms her nerves long enough to get her things out of her locker and into her car.
Exiting the McKinley High parking lot the only thing on her mind is, “Oh God, oh God, oh God.”
****
Three days into the Christmas break and Rachel has more voicemails on her phone than in all of her 17 years and 5 days on this earth. Her fathers are out at some business party at her daddy’s job that she declined to go to. It wouldn’t have made much sense to go, mingling with people she didn’t know. Besides it was her dads’ night out and she didn’t want to rain on their parade.
So naturally being alone two days before Christmas, Rachel decides to go to the only place in Lima she would ever consider being an acceptable hang out. She doesn’t know how long she’d been there, but it must have been a while because the next thing she knows it’s dark outside. She always did find herself lost in music.
She’s minding her own business, silently pursuing new copies of sheet music when he enters. At first it doesn’t really register, he’s just another person with nothing else to do over Christmas break but search for more sheet music. But then she hears his voice and oh God, Jesse St. James is less than 15 feet away from her and there’s no escape.
This is not her finest moment and she knows it. Hiding behind a grand piano was her only option but she never said it was a good one.
“Rachel Berry,” he says it so smug; she knows he’s smirking before she even looks up.
“Jesse St. James,” He is smirking, she hates him for it.
“It’s been a while.”
“It has.”
“If I didn’t know any better I might think your were hiding from me there.”
She scoffs and hopes its convincing, “Don’t flatter yourself, St. James. I was simply looking for an earring I misplaced earlier.”
“You found it then?”
“Yes,” he’s giving her that smirk that’s so arrogant and she just wants to slap it off his face.
“Good.” Just then, Rachel realizes she isn’t wearing earrings, drats!
“So, what brings you here?” He moseys over to her side, sitting on the piano’s bench.
“Sheet music,” she fights the urge to roll her eyes, because really, she doesn’t remember Jesse being this daft.
He nods as if she just said something superbly interesting, playing broken notes on the piano before that smirk plays on his lips again. He all but snatches the sheet music from her hands before playing the opening cords to a song she’s tried so hard to burn from her memory.
“For old times’ sake?”
Apparently Rachel’s become all about the unexpected, “No.”
The look on his face is almost as gratifying as flawlessly executing her storm out. She’d almost made it to her car when she hears him.
“Rachel! Rachel, wait.”
It makes her move faster, ignoring how the cold is seeping into her boots or how the thick snow is making it hard to move.
When she does reach her car she has to fight the urge to scream. It was like the entire universe was conspiring to ruin her. Her adorable little beetle was a covered in snow and there was no way she’d get out of here without help. She does scream, loud and unapologetic and Jesse stops in his tracks when he sees her.
Rachel marches up to him and all of her anger and sadness and loneliness springs forth and she takes it out on him.
“Are you happy now? You come back here and expect everything to be fine between us when I haven’t seen or heard from you in months, not that I wanted to either, but God it’s all your fault. I hate you, I hate you so much. Why couldn’t they just see that it hurt, that he lied; you lied!”
Jesse holds her as she cries, she can feel the tension in his body and the confusion that stains every breath, but he holds her and maybe that’s enough.
***
Jesse’s car is warm. Rachel has long stopped crying as they make the trip back from the local convenience store after picking up some snow salt and a cheap shovel.
Over the sound of the windshield wipers batting away flakes of snow and the low hum of the heater, Rachel can make out the beginning of a song she had put on a playlist for Jesse months ago; she smiles against her will.
Jesse doesn’t ask her about Glee, she doesn’t think she would answer if he did. She doesn’t ask him about school, but the quiet isn’t strained, it seems almost comfortable. It’s disconcerting.
As they reach her car, it’s apparent the situation is even worse. If possible her car is covered in even more snow. Jesse sighs beside her, taking note of the chore at hand.
They fall into a simple rhythm; Jesse shovels while she spreads the salt. It isn’t until they start to make significant headway that she realizes he isn’t wearing gloves. She can’t help but be appalled.
He mumbles out that they’re in the glove compartment and Rachel huffs at his indifference,
“Irresponsible.”
Jesse’s gloves are laid out neatly but when she snatches them in her haste to give him an earful about the importance of proper attire in weather like this she makes the other contents fall out.
She always knew she and Jesse were a lot alike, but the fact that he keeps a Funny Girl DVD in his car is a little odd. Then she sees it. The beautiful handwriting of her idol reads “To Rachel, a star in the making. Barbra Streisand.” Rachel’s heart skips a beat. “Babs.”
Apparently her tardiness is noticeable, “Rachel what’s taking so long- oh.”
“Explain yourself Jesse St. James.”
“I was going to give it to you for your birthday but I don’t get into town in time. So I figured it’d be a good Christmas present.”
“Jesse we haven’t been in contact in months and from our less than amicable departure I would have assumed it would stay that way. Why did you do this for me? It’s not that I’m not grateful, but if I was that close to one Barbra Streisand my last thought would be to get an autograph for someone I no longer have a relationship with.”
“Oh trust me, I got mine first. My second thought however was how much you would die if you were there, so I got one for you.”
“Jesse, I don’t know what to-”
“I never stopped loving you,” his interruption is neither expected nor warranted.
“Don’t say things you don’t mean. You would have never done that to me if you loved me.”
“What I did was deplorable, there’s no excuse and even the explanation I have isn’t the least bit justified. But God, Rachel, I never stopped loving you.”
She doesn’t want to believe him, with his blue eyes boring into her own, pleading and guilty. The same that watched as she was humiliated by her team, the same that looked so cold at Regionals while singing to the entire audience that nothing mattered to him, not even her. She doesn’t want to believe him but apparently Rachel’s become all about the unexpected.
“I never stopped loving you either but that doesn’t mean I didn’t hate you for a while as well.”
“I can take that, it doesn’t mean I’m not going to keep trying though,” his tone is playful but his eyes say something else entirely, making it seem like she may be the only thing that really matters to him.
She doesn’t want to kiss him, doesn’t want to jump into things too soon. She knows how that goes, especially with Jesse St. James, you give too much of your heart too soon and he gets that itch in his hands and drops it, breaks it. She doesn’t want to kiss him but Rachel’s starting to like doing the unexpected.
-
Prompter #27
3. (Pairing) Jesse/Rachel: Rachel gets tired of being mistreated by the whole Glee club and stands up to them, somehow Jesse comes into the picture to help her. (huge St.Berry fan here so this is the most important part)
Title:I Keep My Distance but You Still Catch My Eye
Rating: Pg-13
Pairings/Characters: Rachel Berry/Jesse St James, Mentions of New Directions
Warnings: Minor St. Berry Angst
Word count: 1,954
Disclaimer: This Glee fanfiction is based upon the television show of the same name. All characters and situations other than my own are sole property of Ryan Murphy Productions and 20th Century Fox Television.
Summary: Rachel’s started to like doing the unexpected.
A/N: I hope I met the prompters expectations. Beta'd by the awesome liquoricesky
Rachel Berry is not a very easy person to work with and she realizes this. Her ideas can many times be outrageously biased, her temper tantrums are a force to be reckoned with and her vengeful streak could put fear into any man. However, in this moment she could honestly say that she wasn’t in the wrong.
The glee club had been warming up to her recently however slowly, that much she could say. Like a comment Puck had made earlier in the month, “She’s like athlete’s foot, it kind of sucks to be around but eventually you just get used to it.” It seemed though, after she and Finn broke up, all progress had halted. What she had done was wrong, she understood that. In all honesty it was probably the worst thing she had done to a person (maybe sans one) but they had acted like she didn’t even have a right to be angry.
It had infuriated her. After all the grief she had gotten over baby gate, they had all acted like she didn’t have a right to be angry. It was deplorable, though she briefly remembers Mercedes and Quinn giving her a sheepish look of sympathy, she was furious.
Her protest of silence had started as a tactic to make Mr. Schuester see the error of his ways but after Sectionals were said and done it became a sort of respite from everything and everyone. She would go to Glee, sing her appointed solos and say nothing else.
At first it had thrown everyone for a loop but then gradually it became a joke. How long ‘til Berry cracks. The highest bid had been made for the day before Christmas break and it was money well spent because that’s exactly when it happened.
The club was having trouble finalizing songs for their scheduled chorale during the holidays and naturally Rachel was the go to for suggestions. Question after question went unanswered. Her usual, “Honestly the lack of initiative in this club is appalling, I would have finalized this list three months ago,” was caught on her tongue. She said nothing and of course the other members began to get irritated.
“Rachel come on; stop being such a drama queen.”
“Seriously we have to figure this out.”
“Listen hobbit, I know it may be hard to hear down there and all, but you need to start doing that annoying know it all thing you do so we can finish this.”
“That’s not all she does.”
That was the last straw.
Standing to address the club, Rachel had a plan. She was going to go straight into her well rehearsed spiel asking the glee club to respect her wishes on doing exactly what they always told her to, be quiet. That’s what she had planned to do. So when it comes out her mouth, brazen and confident, no one is more surprised than she.
“I quit.”
Silence took over the choir room as everyone, most of all Rachel, took in what was said.
Mr. Schuester was the first to speak, “Rachel, don’t you think that’s a little rash?”
“Bull, we’ve seen this before. Let her go Mr. Schue, she’ll be back.”
That steels her; get’s her thoughts together and snaps her out of her reverie.
Finn meets her gaze across the room before looking away.
Then Rachel makes another rash decision. She curtsies, just like she always imagined she would on opening night of her first starring role on Broadway, and leaves the room without a word.
As soon as the door closes behind her, Rachel’s sure she’s having a panic attack. She calms her nerves long enough to get her things out of her locker and into her car.
Exiting the McKinley High parking lot the only thing on her mind is, “Oh God, oh God, oh God.”
****
Three days into the Christmas break and Rachel has more voicemails on her phone than in all of her 17 years and 5 days on this earth. Her fathers are out at some business party at her daddy’s job that she declined to go to. It wouldn’t have made much sense to go, mingling with people she didn’t know. Besides it was her dads’ night out and she didn’t want to rain on their parade.
So naturally being alone two days before Christmas, Rachel decides to go to the only place in Lima she would ever consider being an acceptable hang out. She doesn’t know how long she’d been there, but it must have been a while because the next thing she knows it’s dark outside. She always did find herself lost in music.
She’s minding her own business, silently pursuing new copies of sheet music when he enters. At first it doesn’t really register, he’s just another person with nothing else to do over Christmas break but search for more sheet music. But then she hears his voice and oh God, Jesse St. James is less than 15 feet away from her and there’s no escape.
This is not her finest moment and she knows it. Hiding behind a grand piano was her only option but she never said it was a good one.
“Rachel Berry,” he says it so smug; she knows he’s smirking before she even looks up.
“Jesse St. James,” He is smirking, she hates him for it.
“It’s been a while.”
“It has.”
“If I didn’t know any better I might think your were hiding from me there.”
She scoffs and hopes its convincing, “Don’t flatter yourself, St. James. I was simply looking for an earring I misplaced earlier.”
“You found it then?”
“Yes,” he’s giving her that smirk that’s so arrogant and she just wants to slap it off his face.
“Good.” Just then, Rachel realizes she isn’t wearing earrings, drats!
“So, what brings you here?” He moseys over to her side, sitting on the piano’s bench.
“Sheet music,” she fights the urge to roll her eyes, because really, she doesn’t remember Jesse being this daft.
He nods as if she just said something superbly interesting, playing broken notes on the piano before that smirk plays on his lips again. He all but snatches the sheet music from her hands before playing the opening cords to a song she’s tried so hard to burn from her memory.
“For old times’ sake?”
Apparently Rachel’s become all about the unexpected, “No.”
The look on his face is almost as gratifying as flawlessly executing her storm out. She’d almost made it to her car when she hears him.
“Rachel! Rachel, wait.”
It makes her move faster, ignoring how the cold is seeping into her boots or how the thick snow is making it hard to move.
When she does reach her car she has to fight the urge to scream. It was like the entire universe was conspiring to ruin her. Her adorable little beetle was a covered in snow and there was no way she’d get out of here without help. She does scream, loud and unapologetic and Jesse stops in his tracks when he sees her.
Rachel marches up to him and all of her anger and sadness and loneliness springs forth and she takes it out on him.
“Are you happy now? You come back here and expect everything to be fine between us when I haven’t seen or heard from you in months, not that I wanted to either, but God it’s all your fault. I hate you, I hate you so much. Why couldn’t they just see that it hurt, that he lied; you lied!”
Jesse holds her as she cries, she can feel the tension in his body and the confusion that stains every breath, but he holds her and maybe that’s enough.
***
Jesse’s car is warm. Rachel has long stopped crying as they make the trip back from the local convenience store after picking up some snow salt and a cheap shovel.
Over the sound of the windshield wipers batting away flakes of snow and the low hum of the heater, Rachel can make out the beginning of a song she had put on a playlist for Jesse months ago; she smiles against her will.
Jesse doesn’t ask her about Glee, she doesn’t think she would answer if he did. She doesn’t ask him about school, but the quiet isn’t strained, it seems almost comfortable. It’s disconcerting.
As they reach her car, it’s apparent the situation is even worse. If possible her car is covered in even more snow. Jesse sighs beside her, taking note of the chore at hand.
They fall into a simple rhythm; Jesse shovels while she spreads the salt. It isn’t until they start to make significant headway that she realizes he isn’t wearing gloves. She can’t help but be appalled.
He mumbles out that they’re in the glove compartment and Rachel huffs at his indifference,
“Irresponsible.”
Jesse’s gloves are laid out neatly but when she snatches them in her haste to give him an earful about the importance of proper attire in weather like this she makes the other contents fall out.
She always knew she and Jesse were a lot alike, but the fact that he keeps a Funny Girl DVD in his car is a little odd. Then she sees it. The beautiful handwriting of her idol reads “To Rachel, a star in the making. Barbra Streisand.” Rachel’s heart skips a beat. “Babs.”
Apparently her tardiness is noticeable, “Rachel what’s taking so long- oh.”
“Explain yourself Jesse St. James.”
“I was going to give it to you for your birthday but I don’t get into town in time. So I figured it’d be a good Christmas present.”
“Jesse we haven’t been in contact in months and from our less than amicable departure I would have assumed it would stay that way. Why did you do this for me? It’s not that I’m not grateful, but if I was that close to one Barbra Streisand my last thought would be to get an autograph for someone I no longer have a relationship with.”
“Oh trust me, I got mine first. My second thought however was how much you would die if you were there, so I got one for you.”
“Jesse, I don’t know what to-”
“I never stopped loving you,” his interruption is neither expected nor warranted.
“Don’t say things you don’t mean. You would have never done that to me if you loved me.”
“What I did was deplorable, there’s no excuse and even the explanation I have isn’t the least bit justified. But God, Rachel, I never stopped loving you.”
She doesn’t want to believe him, with his blue eyes boring into her own, pleading and guilty. The same that watched as she was humiliated by her team, the same that looked so cold at Regionals while singing to the entire audience that nothing mattered to him, not even her. She doesn’t want to believe him but apparently Rachel’s become all about the unexpected.
“I never stopped loving you either but that doesn’t mean I didn’t hate you for a while as well.”
“I can take that, it doesn’t mean I’m not going to keep trying though,” his tone is playful but his eyes say something else entirely, making it seem like she may be the only thing that really matters to him.
She doesn’t want to kiss him, doesn’t want to jump into things too soon. She knows how that goes, especially with Jesse St. James, you give too much of your heart too soon and he gets that itch in his hands and drops it, breaks it. She doesn’t want to kiss him but Rachel’s starting to like doing the unexpected.
-
Prompter #27
3. (Pairing) Jesse/Rachel: Rachel gets tired of being mistreated by the whole Glee club and stands up to them, somehow Jesse comes into the picture to help her. (huge St.Berry fan here so this is the most important part)