So apparently this newest episode gave me ~feelings~
Uh yeah, I actually only set out to write an episode reaction, but instead it turned into a longwinded meta analysis of the David - Kurt relationship...Idek
So if anyone is interested in it, my thoughts on it, based on todays episodes, meaning, massive spoilers for "Heart" under the cut as well as a disclaimer, that I'm not a Kurtofsky shipper, but I don't hate on anyones preferences and I hope you will extend me the same curtesies ;)
The reactions to those two seem to be mixed between “YAY Kurtofsky should happen, Blaine sucks” and “NO Kurtofsky is an abomination, urgh, they shouldn't even talk Klaine forever!” and mhm there doesn’t seem to be much middle ground? I don’t know if that’s normal for this fandom, but it suprises me a bit.
Because I’m really in the middle ground. I love Klaine, I think they are adorable and I ship them like mad. At some points it was hard, because lots of Blaines character developement is very much between-the-lines, but we are getting more and more of it (actually a reason why I liked s2 “Silly love songs”, BiotA and Sexy so much, because we saw some actual character traits on Blaine).
And while I like the Karofsky character and what they did with him AND him being the secret admirer in this episode I could never, ever ship them. And while I think the writers did an excellent job today in illustrating just why that is, I’m apparently passionate enough in this subject to want to add my own two cents^^.
Please be aware that this is 1) my own opinion and interpretations of the story-line and characters, you can agree or disagree, but please no flaming 2)I will talk a bit (and I mean a bit) about sexual assault/harrassement later on, so if anyone would be triggered by that please be warned.
David Karofsky
I totally buy that David has a crush on Kurt, I would even go so far as saying that Kurt was probably responsible for his sexual awakening so to speak. He was the reason David figured out he was gay in the first place. After he finally stopped hating himself so much those feelings matured. But, I’m actually with Kurt on this one, I don’t think it is more than that. He admires Kurt for his bravery and he was probably one of the first guys David found himself attracted to and he is the person David projects much of his rehabiliation from a bully on.
With this I mean, that ,as we saw in “Prom Queen”, David feels unspeakably guilty for his actions. The after all stemmed from self-hatred/insecurity and all of it makes him feel like a horrible person. Kurt forgiving him and being understanding validates him in a way as being a “nice guy” again.
In a way, getting Kurt to like or love him would at once absolve him, endorse him and help him in really figuring out his identity as a homosexual man.
That doesn’t mean he doesn’t geniunely like Kurt. I think he absolutely does. I’m sure he admires his positive qualities. In addition this was the first person he could be really honest with. That knew him in a way no-one else did.
But all of that is a horribly bad foundation for an actual relationship, because it puts Kurt on a very high pedestal and makes him the symbol for a lot of things David aspires to be. Again, if all those episodes in which Blaine acted like an idiot/was insensitive/made mistakes hadn’t happened I don’t think I would support them as much, because it made the characters too unequal in their regard in its the same thing here.
But even supposing all of that wasn’t true and not a problem there is the other part of the equation:
Kurt Hummel
And boy, would that be a trainwreck and make me very afraid of Kurts state of mind, mental health and self esteem.
Because while Kurt may have only been good for David the exact opposite of that is true in the reverse. As Kurt said so succinctly he bullied him, terrified him, made him leave his school and with that his social environment only to get away from him. Kurt was always aware that life wasn’t fair and especially not to people like him, but in a way he still had the childlike innocence and deep seated surety, that while people may not like him, he was safe.
And David’s actions more than any other took that away from him. And he may have changed and he may have had his reasons and he may be repentant, but that doesn’t change the fact that he not only physically assaulted him, but he also terrorized him psychologically and sexually.
I wasn’t in the fandom at that time, so I don’t know how much meta there was about it, but it is very clear from his reaction that that kiss was the reason Kurt just couldn’t stay at that school anymore. While physical violence is horrible and destructive as well, sexual violence happens at such a deeper, visceral level. It is something so closely bound to your self-image, self esteem and personal safety, because it is so much more intimate, that a violation of your personal space is felt so much deeper.
Having this instinctive trust and assurance, that you choose your intimate encounters taken away from you, changes a person forever. Just look at accounts of sexual harrassment/abuse victims. Even if as some people like to trivialize “nothing real happened” (which urgh it makes me sick even to write it, anything that makes you uncomfortable in a situation with another person is “real”!) it sticks with you. You jump at things you normally wouldn’t, you may have more problems with intimacy, tread more carefully in certain situations than before.
All of this happened to Kurt and while he dealt with it and is over it, made his peace with it, he will never forget, when he lost this last assurance that his world is safe. And the reason is David Karofsky. Him actually getting into a relationship with a person with whom he has such an abusive background would be horrifying.
He can never truly trust David, will never truly, honestly, deeply feel safe with him and that in the end is the death sentence for any relationship.
I don’t mean to offend anyone, shipping is shipping and everyone is entitled to their own personal interpretations. If you see it, it is there for you and I would never try to take that enjoyment from anyone. I can definitevely see a friendship developing between them, that would be beneficial for both parties. But for me, a romantic relationship would be dysfunctional at best and dangerously unhealthy at worst.
oh and mods I just went ahead and tagged this with some new tags, I hope I didn't do anything wrong with it
So if anyone is interested in it, my thoughts on it, based on todays episodes, meaning, massive spoilers for "Heart" under the cut as well as a disclaimer, that I'm not a Kurtofsky shipper, but I don't hate on anyones preferences and I hope you will extend me the same curtesies ;)
The reactions to those two seem to be mixed between “YAY Kurtofsky should happen, Blaine sucks” and “NO Kurtofsky is an abomination, urgh, they shouldn't even talk Klaine forever!” and mhm there doesn’t seem to be much middle ground? I don’t know if that’s normal for this fandom, but it suprises me a bit.
Because I’m really in the middle ground. I love Klaine, I think they are adorable and I ship them like mad. At some points it was hard, because lots of Blaines character developement is very much between-the-lines, but we are getting more and more of it (actually a reason why I liked s2 “Silly love songs”, BiotA and Sexy so much, because we saw some actual character traits on Blaine).
And while I like the Karofsky character and what they did with him AND him being the secret admirer in this episode I could never, ever ship them. And while I think the writers did an excellent job today in illustrating just why that is, I’m apparently passionate enough in this subject to want to add my own two cents^^.
Please be aware that this is 1) my own opinion and interpretations of the story-line and characters, you can agree or disagree, but please no flaming 2)I will talk a bit (and I mean a bit) about sexual assault/harrassement later on, so if anyone would be triggered by that please be warned.
David Karofsky
I totally buy that David has a crush on Kurt, I would even go so far as saying that Kurt was probably responsible for his sexual awakening so to speak. He was the reason David figured out he was gay in the first place. After he finally stopped hating himself so much those feelings matured. But, I’m actually with Kurt on this one, I don’t think it is more than that. He admires Kurt for his bravery and he was probably one of the first guys David found himself attracted to and he is the person David projects much of his rehabiliation from a bully on.
With this I mean, that ,as we saw in “Prom Queen”, David feels unspeakably guilty for his actions. The after all stemmed from self-hatred/insecurity and all of it makes him feel like a horrible person. Kurt forgiving him and being understanding validates him in a way as being a “nice guy” again.
In a way, getting Kurt to like or love him would at once absolve him, endorse him and help him in really figuring out his identity as a homosexual man.
That doesn’t mean he doesn’t geniunely like Kurt. I think he absolutely does. I’m sure he admires his positive qualities. In addition this was the first person he could be really honest with. That knew him in a way no-one else did.
But all of that is a horribly bad foundation for an actual relationship, because it puts Kurt on a very high pedestal and makes him the symbol for a lot of things David aspires to be. Again, if all those episodes in which Blaine acted like an idiot/was insensitive/made mistakes hadn’t happened I don’t think I would support them as much, because it made the characters too unequal in their regard in its the same thing here.
But even supposing all of that wasn’t true and not a problem there is the other part of the equation:
Kurt Hummel
And boy, would that be a trainwreck and make me very afraid of Kurts state of mind, mental health and self esteem.
Because while Kurt may have only been good for David the exact opposite of that is true in the reverse. As Kurt said so succinctly he bullied him, terrified him, made him leave his school and with that his social environment only to get away from him. Kurt was always aware that life wasn’t fair and especially not to people like him, but in a way he still had the childlike innocence and deep seated surety, that while people may not like him, he was safe.
And David’s actions more than any other took that away from him. And he may have changed and he may have had his reasons and he may be repentant, but that doesn’t change the fact that he not only physically assaulted him, but he also terrorized him psychologically and sexually.
I wasn’t in the fandom at that time, so I don’t know how much meta there was about it, but it is very clear from his reaction that that kiss was the reason Kurt just couldn’t stay at that school anymore. While physical violence is horrible and destructive as well, sexual violence happens at such a deeper, visceral level. It is something so closely bound to your self-image, self esteem and personal safety, because it is so much more intimate, that a violation of your personal space is felt so much deeper.
Having this instinctive trust and assurance, that you choose your intimate encounters taken away from you, changes a person forever. Just look at accounts of sexual harrassment/abuse victims. Even if as some people like to trivialize “nothing real happened” (which urgh it makes me sick even to write it, anything that makes you uncomfortable in a situation with another person is “real”!) it sticks with you. You jump at things you normally wouldn’t, you may have more problems with intimacy, tread more carefully in certain situations than before.
All of this happened to Kurt and while he dealt with it and is over it, made his peace with it, he will never forget, when he lost this last assurance that his world is safe. And the reason is David Karofsky. Him actually getting into a relationship with a person with whom he has such an abusive background would be horrifying.
He can never truly trust David, will never truly, honestly, deeply feel safe with him and that in the end is the death sentence for any relationship.
I don’t mean to offend anyone, shipping is shipping and everyone is entitled to their own personal interpretations. If you see it, it is there for you and I would never try to take that enjoyment from anyone. I can definitevely see a friendship developing between them, that would be beneficial for both parties. But for me, a romantic relationship would be dysfunctional at best and dangerously unhealthy at worst.
oh and mods I just went ahead and tagged this with some new tags, I hope I didn't do anything wrong with it