(no subject)
i can't decide where to go to college. i don't even know if i will be accepted anywhere i apply. but i know i don't want to be here.
the past few days have been weird...good, and bad...but i don't know. i don't know what to do, about a lot of things. and it doesn't help that i am one of the most indecisive people ever. seriously, i am.
i just don't know. i don't know what i want and i am so confused. overall, things have been better today...but only in some areas. i'm not depressed, because i am aware how all of this sounds, there is just so much to think about and my mind can't handle all of it. my grandpa, who is a retired psychiatrist told me i am retroflective. he said i push my feelings back into my muscles because i don't want to deal with them and i don't want to show that i'm not always as happy as i make myself come across, he said it contributes to migraines a lot. that sucks, you know.
i am so tired. it's only 10:30. i am going to go lay down in my bed and close my eyes.
and if only i knew what was really going on, what was really going to happen.
the past few days have been weird...good, and bad...but i don't know. i don't know what to do, about a lot of things. and it doesn't help that i am one of the most indecisive people ever. seriously, i am.
i just don't know. i don't know what i want and i am so confused. overall, things have been better today...but only in some areas. i'm not depressed, because i am aware how all of this sounds, there is just so much to think about and my mind can't handle all of it. my grandpa, who is a retired psychiatrist told me i am retroflective. he said i push my feelings back into my muscles because i don't want to deal with them and i don't want to show that i'm not always as happy as i make myself come across, he said it contributes to migraines a lot. that sucks, you know.
i am so tired. it's only 10:30. i am going to go lay down in my bed and close my eyes.
and if only i knew what was really going on, what was really going to happen.