my first iPhone livejournal post
I want so badly to win her I over. But I can't.
I don't love her any less. I never have, not even for a moment.
But she's with someone else now. I know I've lost her forever.
The other night I put up a post here mentioning I was contemplating suicide. This was not a cry for help; I said it because I honestly felt it. But there have also been times when I honest wanted to run around knife and go on a melée-only killing spree on my bosses at previous jobs, ala every first person shooter ever made. Contemplating something (and thinking of the rammifications) and doing them are very different things. All the things I said are things I've felt since I was a child, and I'm still around.
By the way, I have the best friends anyone could ever hope for. I love you with all of my heart. You and my family are the reason I'd never pull the trigger, literally and figuratively speaking. I wouldn't want to do that to any of you. I'd never want any one to think it was their fault.
I don't love her any less. I never have, not even for a moment.
But she's with someone else now. I know I've lost her forever.
The other night I put up a post here mentioning I was contemplating suicide. This was not a cry for help; I said it because I honestly felt it. But there have also been times when I honest wanted to run around knife and go on a melée-only killing spree on my bosses at previous jobs, ala every first person shooter ever made. Contemplating something (and thinking of the rammifications) and doing them are very different things. All the things I said are things I've felt since I was a child, and I'm still around.
By the way, I have the best friends anyone could ever hope for. I love you with all of my heart. You and my family are the reason I'd never pull the trigger, literally and figuratively speaking. I wouldn't want to do that to any of you. I'd never want any one to think it was their fault.