(no subject)
I'm in so much pain from laxatives. It hurts so much. It's times like these that remind me of how much I need treatment...and not just treatment. Treatment on its own is not enough. I need to let go...
I can't passively be in treatment. I need to work hard. I need to be an active participant in treatment. Now this is the truth that I don't want to face. My reluctance to get better is a bigger barrier than my lack of access to treatment.
I don't know what else to type other than that I really need to stop taking those pills. I think they're more far and beyond more damaging than "typical" purging.
What good is a full-time job when I sit at home in so much pain at night...and this is just the tip of the iceberg.
I really need to make an honest effort to stop taking laxatives. I can't pay my medical bills, which has gone to collections, so sadly, that means I can't afford any therapy sessions.
My life.
My life is so out of control.
I can't passively be in treatment. I need to work hard. I need to be an active participant in treatment. Now this is the truth that I don't want to face. My reluctance to get better is a bigger barrier than my lack of access to treatment.
I don't know what else to type other than that I really need to stop taking those pills. I think they're more far and beyond more damaging than "typical" purging.
What good is a full-time job when I sit at home in so much pain at night...and this is just the tip of the iceberg.
I really need to make an honest effort to stop taking laxatives. I can't pay my medical bills, which has gone to collections, so sadly, that means I can't afford any therapy sessions.
My life.
My life is so out of control.