If I Die Before I Wake...
This subject has been on my heart lately...
I'm going to die. Maybe not tonight, maybe not tomorrow, maybe not for 80 years.... But I am going to die. But for the last few days, I've had this strange feeling that i go to sleep with, dream of, wake up with and ponder during the day. My time, is short and it's coming to an end quicker than I'm expecting it. I may not live for 80 more years, the feeling I am have had lately is saying I may not live for more than 5 years. Maybe less. Much less.
So I turned on my computer, got out of bed and decided to say this, JUST IN CASE I should die or something happens to me in the near future....Here is what I want you all, and everyone else to know...
I loved you all. I loved God above all us since he saved me on July 7th 2002. I'm sorry for anything I have ever done to hurt or betray anyone. Anything sinful, immoral, or just plain horrid in anyones eyes, I apologize for that. I would not purpsoely do anything I found to be of poor judgement or character. I tried living life as much a spossible, even if I never felt 100% fullfilled. There are still things I wish I could do. Still more people I wish I could reach and help or even save. There are still causes to be fought and lessons to be learned. If I should leave this earth, my life will not be complete, but with what I got finished, I'm extremely proud of and thrilled I got that far. I am not disappointed with my life. Few things I regret, but without those events I would not be what I am today, or was the day before or will be.
I was put here, for a mission. I have a plan and I hope I get to complete it and complete it to the best of my ability. I hope I someday fully understand my purpose and plan. And iof I should die before you or in your arms, I want to thank you for being there with me. I want to thank you for being my friend and my family. Even if I can't remember you the way I do now, I'll watch over you from heaven, and pray and sing a song for you. I Thank God every day and night for the people who surround me. Agree with their lifestyles and choices or not, I love them and need them.
I've learned a lot of things, do not matter. The car you drive, the clothes you wear. The people you are friends with, the grades you get. The money you make, where you live. What you eat, and other peoples opinions. If a girl or boy likes you, if someone hates you. These things and so much more, are pointless. In the long run, through eternity, they do not matter. (Agree with me or not...) I feel the only thing that will ever matter, is if you know and love Jesus Christ. I've put my faith in the fact (yes fact to me) that it's the truth, the way and the light. I believe we aren't on earth for pointless reasons and there is more after we die. Otherwise, why are we here? Besides, how can somehting this big and historic be wrong?
I want the world to know, I tried. I want everyone to at least respect the fact and acknowledge that I did what I could to save the world. Wheather it be by leaidng one 14 year old to God, or helping, or just picking up the trahs in the hallways at my school. Whether it be me flying across the United States to speak to teens and college students, or anything else. I pray people know what I tried to do, and that they can be proud of me, as I am proud of me.
I apologize for any lnog posts, papers or anything of literature relation I've ever written that was too long for you to read. I have a bad habit of writing every little thought in my head. But I hope they helped you somehow.
Whetahe ryou hate me, love me, or barely know me at all... I want to thank you and let you know, I did not just exist. I did my best to live, and live for God in the time I had. And if you would attend my funeral, that'd be cool. I would want EVERYONE who had ANYTHING to say about me or an experience that had the slightest slice of me in it, that they share it. I wish for my funeral, not to be a sad day, but a day of sharing, and happiness. I'll never truly leave any of my friends or aquaintences. I rememeber you all. Even the weird kind in 1st grade. You've all affected me. Please share that. And please try to influence others and be a part of their life. HELP AND HEAL. Minister and pray. Hope and try. And rememebr that your time is short.
I'm not sure when I'm going. I'm not sure why I wrote this. I'm not sure what I wrote becuase my fingers took over. God bless.
-Travis
Isaiaha 61
I'm going to die. Maybe not tonight, maybe not tomorrow, maybe not for 80 years.... But I am going to die. But for the last few days, I've had this strange feeling that i go to sleep with, dream of, wake up with and ponder during the day. My time, is short and it's coming to an end quicker than I'm expecting it. I may not live for 80 more years, the feeling I am have had lately is saying I may not live for more than 5 years. Maybe less. Much less.
So I turned on my computer, got out of bed and decided to say this, JUST IN CASE I should die or something happens to me in the near future....Here is what I want you all, and everyone else to know...
I loved you all. I loved God above all us since he saved me on July 7th 2002. I'm sorry for anything I have ever done to hurt or betray anyone. Anything sinful, immoral, or just plain horrid in anyones eyes, I apologize for that. I would not purpsoely do anything I found to be of poor judgement or character. I tried living life as much a spossible, even if I never felt 100% fullfilled. There are still things I wish I could do. Still more people I wish I could reach and help or even save. There are still causes to be fought and lessons to be learned. If I should leave this earth, my life will not be complete, but with what I got finished, I'm extremely proud of and thrilled I got that far. I am not disappointed with my life. Few things I regret, but without those events I would not be what I am today, or was the day before or will be.
I was put here, for a mission. I have a plan and I hope I get to complete it and complete it to the best of my ability. I hope I someday fully understand my purpose and plan. And iof I should die before you or in your arms, I want to thank you for being there with me. I want to thank you for being my friend and my family. Even if I can't remember you the way I do now, I'll watch over you from heaven, and pray and sing a song for you. I Thank God every day and night for the people who surround me. Agree with their lifestyles and choices or not, I love them and need them.
I've learned a lot of things, do not matter. The car you drive, the clothes you wear. The people you are friends with, the grades you get. The money you make, where you live. What you eat, and other peoples opinions. If a girl or boy likes you, if someone hates you. These things and so much more, are pointless. In the long run, through eternity, they do not matter. (Agree with me or not...) I feel the only thing that will ever matter, is if you know and love Jesus Christ. I've put my faith in the fact (yes fact to me) that it's the truth, the way and the light. I believe we aren't on earth for pointless reasons and there is more after we die. Otherwise, why are we here? Besides, how can somehting this big and historic be wrong?
I want the world to know, I tried. I want everyone to at least respect the fact and acknowledge that I did what I could to save the world. Wheather it be by leaidng one 14 year old to God, or helping, or just picking up the trahs in the hallways at my school. Whether it be me flying across the United States to speak to teens and college students, or anything else. I pray people know what I tried to do, and that they can be proud of me, as I am proud of me.
I apologize for any lnog posts, papers or anything of literature relation I've ever written that was too long for you to read. I have a bad habit of writing every little thought in my head. But I hope they helped you somehow.
Whetahe ryou hate me, love me, or barely know me at all... I want to thank you and let you know, I did not just exist. I did my best to live, and live for God in the time I had. And if you would attend my funeral, that'd be cool. I would want EVERYONE who had ANYTHING to say about me or an experience that had the slightest slice of me in it, that they share it. I wish for my funeral, not to be a sad day, but a day of sharing, and happiness. I'll never truly leave any of my friends or aquaintences. I rememeber you all. Even the weird kind in 1st grade. You've all affected me. Please share that. And please try to influence others and be a part of their life. HELP AND HEAL. Minister and pray. Hope and try. And rememebr that your time is short.
I'm not sure when I'm going. I'm not sure why I wrote this. I'm not sure what I wrote becuase my fingers took over. God bless.
-Travis
Isaiaha 61