i feel alittle better today.....
i skipped school again...i'm in some shit in my classic civ class but not un repairable....but emily came over today to keep me company. my dad was in hospital today seeing if there was a serouis problem with his heart and i was alittle.....well...i wasn't feeling well myself and so that being added on and my mom's unbearable sense of worry being thrown on me last night about money, my dad's health, school, parking, work and lots of things just had me really sad last night. i watch half of girl interuppted and went to bed ha. but emily was over today and took some pictures. i wswear to god my mom's camera is a peice of shit. it's impossible to make anything in focus or in good light. but whatever. we had mass fun. she just left and my parents wil lbe home soon, apprently my dad is okay. they rean the tests and things seem to be clear and good with his heart, so maybe now they can fix his hernia. i feel bad for dude man, it seems so clear to me that he is getting older and i know that's hard on every dudley male in existence. since all of us at some point seem to do drugs to deal with times in our lives when things are changing all around us and junctions of age and shit, some of us pull it together though, others drink them self to death like my dear and poor cusion adie or like nat the jury is still far from coming back in on his fate. mine is.......out as well i guess......i'd like to say diffeerent. ben seems to be pretty top notch though, but the older ones, wayne, my dad, and glenn.......well...they all have some level of getting by in happiness but in other ways it seems always obvouis that there is something lurking on thier shoulder. well......enough about this shit.....
pictures ha....they suck, but i'm happy to spend anytime i get with emily, anyone who does as many drugs as her, when you get to be with them for a time when they are sober and happy, you're just happy to get the chance....cause i mean....i don't know.... i've seen her in dark places more than good....seen her on drugs more than not....so to see this beautiful girl smile and laugh makes my part associated with heart very calmed and happy to see my freind this way. it's also nice not to have sexaul tension. we layed in bed talking for a bit and it wasn't awkward or anything but how good boy/girl intrapersonal but freindly realshinships can work i nthe way that boy on boy action just can not. at least not for me ha. i can't be close to boys emotionally, not really close. that doesnt seem to suprising i guess. i'm an american male afterall....but even though i fight that to a degree, or not so much fight but am not it because of my hippie lineage and the montessori stuck into my breast, it's still in me. i don't deny it. i love the girls, they get all my emotion if i am not pounding it into a guitar or on the ivorys or writing the destruction into some story. anyway, anyway, picture time. they do suck...but as i said, i enjoy them because of who took them, none of emily since as always, upon the taking of every picture of her she deletes it...i really only have the one picture of her. it's a good one though so i don't care.
pictures are big for those with slow comps...
me lighting insence in my room. ah, fuck my hair.....grow out you fuckin asses.....
ha, i like this one, i was looking at a book on the floor that fell off the shelf in my "other room" and she took it off a clip board ha. i was playing guitar for awhile while she was here.
ha, then she laughed for five minutes that i had a book called deep throat. it's about watergate ha. not the funner kind...ha
me fake rockin' out. ha it's so fake. check the roof caving in though. that's rock and rule for real that i sleep under that everynight ha. plus the stick in the corner that i got at the goarge and hauled back to cinci a couple years back. you can see the butterfly on my guitar, yes! and again, fuck short hair.
i wanted a pick of my guitar with its tight blue strings so i took this in the mirroir ha.
an old saw in my room. when my cusin nat and i used to record stuff sometimes he used to play this with my violin bow. i don't think we ever got this perticuler saw to work though since it was so old and rusty. but it's been sitting there for years. ha.
aww and the me laying in bed picture that everyone does. her's was way better than mine, why? cause she's a beautiful girl, but again, we argued and she deleted it ha. i didn't argue too much though.
there are some others but i don't feel like posting them. love y'all and i am off to work......soon ha.
~tommy
pictures ha....they suck, but i'm happy to spend anytime i get with emily, anyone who does as many drugs as her, when you get to be with them for a time when they are sober and happy, you're just happy to get the chance....cause i mean....i don't know.... i've seen her in dark places more than good....seen her on drugs more than not....so to see this beautiful girl smile and laugh makes my part associated with heart very calmed and happy to see my freind this way. it's also nice not to have sexaul tension. we layed in bed talking for a bit and it wasn't awkward or anything but how good boy/girl intrapersonal but freindly realshinships can work i nthe way that boy on boy action just can not. at least not for me ha. i can't be close to boys emotionally, not really close. that doesnt seem to suprising i guess. i'm an american male afterall....but even though i fight that to a degree, or not so much fight but am not it because of my hippie lineage and the montessori stuck into my breast, it's still in me. i don't deny it. i love the girls, they get all my emotion if i am not pounding it into a guitar or on the ivorys or writing the destruction into some story. anyway, anyway, picture time. they do suck...but as i said, i enjoy them because of who took them, none of emily since as always, upon the taking of every picture of her she deletes it...i really only have the one picture of her. it's a good one though so i don't care.
pictures are big for those with slow comps...
me lighting insence in my room. ah, fuck my hair.....grow out you fuckin asses.....
ha, i like this one, i was looking at a book on the floor that fell off the shelf in my "other room" and she took it off a clip board ha. i was playing guitar for awhile while she was here.
ha, then she laughed for five minutes that i had a book called deep throat. it's about watergate ha. not the funner kind...ha
me fake rockin' out. ha it's so fake. check the roof caving in though. that's rock and rule for real that i sleep under that everynight ha. plus the stick in the corner that i got at the goarge and hauled back to cinci a couple years back. you can see the butterfly on my guitar, yes! and again, fuck short hair.
i wanted a pick of my guitar with its tight blue strings so i took this in the mirroir ha.
an old saw in my room. when my cusin nat and i used to record stuff sometimes he used to play this with my violin bow. i don't think we ever got this perticuler saw to work though since it was so old and rusty. but it's been sitting there for years. ha.
aww and the me laying in bed picture that everyone does. her's was way better than mine, why? cause she's a beautiful girl, but again, we argued and she deleted it ha. i didn't argue too much though.
there are some others but i don't feel like posting them. love y'all and i am off to work......soon ha.
~tommy