"I Just Need Some Space... To Clear My Head... To Think About My Life... [Without] You..."
Okay. So I've been in both places; lived both roles... I've come to the conclusion that this one is definitely harder... At least, the first time... I never thought I'd have to say goodbye to any of my friends for an extended period of time... I did once in New York, but the roles were reversed; I was the one leaving... I didn't have a going away party; I merely saw everyone that last time at Darlene's Party, and called it a day... Sure, leaving I got a little teary eyed, and spent the first half hour on the road crying, but I didn't cry over anyone in particular... Then my Dad scares the shit out of me on Christmas day by randomly showing up at my house... He stayed for two weeks, and then I was forced into this role; I had to say goodbye to him... He was leaving, and I was left in the dust... I tried to be strong for him, I tried not to shed a tear, but they have a bad habit of coming out... I bawled like a baby on his first day out of the womb... I was a wreck...
After a few more occurances of my Dad randomly showed up my door, the tears slowly faded into a single embrace that led into him walking out of the door... That was it; he was gone, I could accept it... The same thing with my Step-Dad... I knew I'd be shoved into this role sometime this week... I knew it was going to be hard one me, more so on Brian... I tried not to think about it... I came into last night just like any other night I'd spend with the guys... I knew I'd have to say goodbye at some point, but of course I pushed that fact out of my being, and joked about his going away... For months, it's been an on going discussion... For months, it was always so far off... And now, it's here... Kyle is leaving on Friday, and there isn't a damn thing in the world I can do about it... I think I'm over it though... Writing is a cathartic activity; it allows me to expell all of the energy that I'm feeling at the time, and put it down on paper... I will be alright... I'm over the crying... Sure, tears might come late at night, for a day or two, but I'll be fine... The faucet has finally turned off...
Later All...