The reason why...
The reason why I've been asking people for Xmas lists is because this year will be tough for me. Especially with my family and friends. Next year I'll be off at college with plans of my own and shit so this is my last christmas technicallt to have with my friends and family. I highly doubt that all my senior friends are coming home for christmas if we're all going to be spread out acrossed america. Anyways, I was just hoping this year I could try and make it special for me because I wanted to fit in my mom as well, but I just found out that I'm not going to be able to because I'm going to Vegas and Arizone for the week of the 21-31st, so I'll be gone. So my mom is hoping to take me Thanksgiving which hurts me again because I won't be able to spend it down here with all of my friends and my dad and stuff. I hate having a split family because I feel like I have to choose, then it also doesn't help when Westin is coming home during these two holidays and I REALLY WANT to see and spend time with him for at least one of those holidays, but I have this bottom of my gut feeling that I might not be able to for two reasons, one I will not say and the other is because he'll most likely be hanging out with his family and other prairie friends that are home visiting. I guess I would actually prefer him to do that since his family is more important to him and I would love it if he could see his friends again. I'm sure I'll get to see him, but I doubt we'll actually spend one of those days or nights to see each other and celebrate one of those hildays for ourselves. Like having a nice dinner or just lying with each other...or....-.- *sigh*.... Anyways so for those two months I'm going to try and fit everyone in, because I don't want to spend another christmas alone. Last year I was dragged around with my family to places that I didn't want to go because I didn't have anyone to talk to around my age so I felt bored and alone, sure it was nice to hang out with my family, but I didn't like it as much as I should have. Ugh I don't know what I'm going to do this year, maybe I should just forget about it. But I guess the effort I put into it might be nice, even if everything blows up in my face. :) I hope everyone enjoys Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas.