Oh what a day...what a day, what a day, a la Erykah Badu...
This week has been something else. Tonight I'm hanging out with my best gallie Vanessa. Man, it's been a while since we've kicked it live! I remember us going to Ana's (Anastasia's Asylum, a really hype cafe out here in SaMo)and enjoying the music, chatting with the band members who were waiting for their gig to start, sippin' Hot Choc with style&grace, and speaking on things ephemeral and on that which is tangible. Boy, do we need each others' company right about now. I usually (at least lately) balk at the idea of needing anyone but God. I feel as though so many of my girlfriends have fallen by the wayside and left me to float alone. Even V, and she is supposed to be "my bestest" in SaMo! My two best friends from SOUTH Central, Michael and Kyra, seem to be floating on the clouds of blissful love-God I miss them! Don't cry, now! -a tear drops- Oh well, what's the use in fighting it? Crying is a mechanism that God gives us for cleansing ourselves of woe and self-pity. In fact, it's useful for so much more-there goes that wretched eyelash that I couldn't seem to get out earlier-J/K! I've got to reconnect with my familia, on the real. Any whosies, I'm so jazzed about leaving crazy old LA and hitting a different scene? England and France! (Yeahhhhhhh, boiiiiiii!) I was almost worried that I wouldn't make it, but the sitch is looking more and more possible as time passes. Come on, scholarships, do yo thang! Please, God, get me out of LA. Oh, yeah, I should probably be talking about my day, eh? So back to the subject line-oh what a day...what a day, what a day! I took a test in la clase de Espanol today. I sure feel rotten-I know I didn't study like I should have, and for that (most likely when I get my test back on Tuesday) I take full responsibility. Bad Sarai-that's what one of my friends used to call me when I goofed-or when I was in sin-or when I growled at her whenever she tried to wake me up assorted mornings. I talked with a friend about how beautiful God can be even when a given day doesn't convey any semblance of beauty. Life has a beauty beyond what the eye can see. A part of what made today a tad undiscernable involves some research I did on the Net recently. I may or may not have a semi-rare form of cancer. Usually I'm quite the drama queen, yet somehow when it comes to things such as this, I grow numb, then emotion comes and usurps me-but only for a second-then I emerge into this eerie place of acceptance. I talked to God seriously for some time after doing the research. That was the numb phase. Then I teared up a bit when another one of my good friends (not a disciple, yet fiercely loyal), told me almost in tears herself, that if I even thought that something was wrong I should go to the doctor. She has a friend who is dying of cancer after having a long remission period. The cancer stayed dormant for a while and resurfaced quite suddenly. She has reached a stage in the cancer wherein it can no longer be treated because she waited too long to check it out. I am hesitant to go, yet I want to know what's going on with my body, if anything. Tonight I'm going to tell V about the "possibility". Sometimes I wonder what will be written on my tombstone-eeeek. I should stop with the macabre thoughts. Today is the genesis fo acceptance.I'm preparing myself for whatever may come, be it good or bad-in the physical sense. For all who read this, please pray for me. My mom has had similar Scares, and a couple have come to fruition. Her cancer was caught in its earlier stages, Thanks be to Mon Dieu. But know knows? I haven't told many people yet, btw. Other than that, I had a wonderful day with some friends after school at the Getty. And the day continues...