My blogs are record less of the eventful days that have passed.
I always imagined a new years kiss the way we brought in '07. Loud music, and crowds of people, a count down... part of me holds on to moments passing by- hoping it stays this way hand in hand...the other anticipates the possibilities and then time stops and everything around you disappears but her and there's nothing else to do but be together.
I spent a few days in St. Thomas just outside London, where she grew up. It has a population of 30,000 and the bar we went to - well let's just say I was a minority in every respect. She bought me a hot red Addias winter jacket for Christmas and hid behind a cushion while I ripped the wrapping. Her niece made a cute coke can flower and glued it to the gift. I got her a hoodie that fit her perfect. She wore it for days straight cause it was the hotness.
My bank accounts empty, so is my refrigerator. But I am brand new and on my way to fixing myself.
Friday night I put it all away and held back tears so hers could be free. She dropped me to work the next morning and asked me when she'd see me again. I didn't answer her because I can't grasp the concept of never.
i hid under the covers for the next few days, wishing the texts would stop but holding on to my phone when too long of a period went by without her. Tomorrow I'm heading to Ottawa to see her MC a big party. She convinced me with a final text of 'give me a chance to show you how amazing I am'
I have never wanted happy as bad as I want it for her.
I spent a few days in St. Thomas just outside London, where she grew up. It has a population of 30,000 and the bar we went to - well let's just say I was a minority in every respect. She bought me a hot red Addias winter jacket for Christmas and hid behind a cushion while I ripped the wrapping. Her niece made a cute coke can flower and glued it to the gift. I got her a hoodie that fit her perfect. She wore it for days straight cause it was the hotness.
My bank accounts empty, so is my refrigerator. But I am brand new and on my way to fixing myself.
Friday night I put it all away and held back tears so hers could be free. She dropped me to work the next morning and asked me when she'd see me again. I didn't answer her because I can't grasp the concept of never.
i hid under the covers for the next few days, wishing the texts would stop but holding on to my phone when too long of a period went by without her. Tomorrow I'm heading to Ottawa to see her MC a big party. She convinced me with a final text of 'give me a chance to show you how amazing I am'
I have never wanted happy as bad as I want it for her.