(no subject)
Dear People Who Pick Up Books and Don't Put Them Back,
If I ever see you committing this crime I will RIP OUT YOUR SOUL with RUSTY TENTERHOOKS. And possibly beat your body to an unrecognizable pulp with a shovel.
Breathing Fire,
RaeAnn
Dear Borders' Children's Lit Section,
You are pants at alphabetical order. You are setting a bad example for the next generation. As they say on Salute Your Shorts, "Get it right or pay the price."
Mildly Miffed,
RaeAnn
Dear Hour Wasted,
Fuck you.
Bitter and Sour like Old Milk,
RaeAnn
Which is to say, I left for Borders looking forward to reading the first Keys to the Kingdom book and thinking of pleasant things such as the way my new $2 flip-flops allow me to feel the texture of the ground but give me access to public places, and came back composing hate-filled letters to the world. It was actually a rather decent day until that point. Could probably be summarized in the following table:
Desk assistant not charging me for forgetting my key too many times: +2
Acquiring two boxes of Thin Mints: +4
Not getting to read Mister Monday: -20
I'm just going to continue with my very productive fuming now.
If I ever see you committing this crime I will RIP OUT YOUR SOUL with RUSTY TENTERHOOKS. And possibly beat your body to an unrecognizable pulp with a shovel.
Breathing Fire,
RaeAnn
Dear Borders' Children's Lit Section,
You are pants at alphabetical order. You are setting a bad example for the next generation. As they say on Salute Your Shorts, "Get it right or pay the price."
Mildly Miffed,
RaeAnn
Dear Hour Wasted,
Fuck you.
Bitter and Sour like Old Milk,
RaeAnn
Which is to say, I left for Borders looking forward to reading the first Keys to the Kingdom book and thinking of pleasant things such as the way my new $2 flip-flops allow me to feel the texture of the ground but give me access to public places, and came back composing hate-filled letters to the world. It was actually a rather decent day until that point. Could probably be summarized in the following table:
Desk assistant not charging me for forgetting my key too many times: +2
Acquiring two boxes of Thin Mints: +4
Not getting to read Mister Monday: -20
I'm just going to continue with my very productive fuming now.