New Unending ficlet
Title: Sleeping with Beauty
Author: Gioia
Rating: PG
Summary: "Love is stupid and it frightens him more than anything and that includs even the Ori but still, what would life would mean if your heart can't be hurt anymore and...suddenly his thoughts escape him as he looks to see Vala smiling at him. She truly has one of the most stunning smiles he has ever seen on anyone."
Category: Romance
Pairings/Characters: Daniel/Vala
Spoilers: Unending
Daniel woke up to find Vala resting her head over his shoulder, gazing at him with a strange look on her face. “Hi.” He says softly, tilting his head to the side with a faint smile and watching Vala as she gave him a small, sleepy, but sincere smile. “Hi yourself.” She replies at back of her hand as she yawns a little. His hand moves to brush her wild hair off of her forehead. There must really be something about sleepy smiles and bed hair that can be only achieved by sleeping that makes you easily lower, if not completely breach your walls; even the ones that are built by so many years of desperation, longing and fear of being hurt.
When he was still at college, he knew this guy, a man-slut, moving from one girl's bed to another's in the same night. One day he heard him saying over a shot of tequila in their dorm rooms while he was trying to finish his last essay, “You know the first rule about being a Casanova?” He had asked to his rather interested friends. “The first rule after the condoms, obviously, ” he had corrected himself with a lazy smile. “Don't fall asleep in their arms or if you do drop off, don't stay until they wake up; get the hell of out of there, immediately.” He had said, gulping his shot at once, “I tell you, once you wake up to find her looking at you with those sleepy eyes and smile, it's in that moment that you're really screwed up. It's something about sleepy smiles and bad bed hair, I guess. It makes you fall for women, hard.”
Daniel in this precise moment realized just how much that hormonal jackass was right. There is really something about sleepy smiles and bed hair that make your brick walls come down one by one and makes your heart flutter in a manner that's completely inappropriate for a grown man. That's crazy talk, Daniel knows. His walls have been constantly, sometimes gently, sometimes fiercely, breaking down since the first time she had set foot through the gate and the last three months have been just the cherry on the top of cream. He pulls her closer his body, breathing in her faint sweaty, sex-smelling scent inside his nostrils. “Whatcha doing?” His voice comes out a raspy whisper.
Vala shrugs, her hair tossing wildly and rests her hands under his chin. “Just thinking.” Her smile is still stunning. Not just one of her these big, cocky, all teeth ones. One part of him, possibly the most logical part of him screams, Talk, you need to talk. Don't fall for smiles, you idiot. but he finds it's easier not to care about that pesky voice after all tension that had built between them unraveled, leaving its place a blissful, glowing land of afterglow. And they believe that men couldn't live in afterglow.
He rubs his nose against her skin at the same thinking that the only thing that lacks from the novelty of their night-after, is the sunlight skimming over the Vala's naked body. Instead, her body is covered by gray-blue sheets under the artificial light of their spaceship. He wonders what she would look like naked under the bluish dim light of the Asgard database, under the meaning of life. How dimly sparkling runes shine all over her body as his tongue traces her body up and down, trying to figure out as if she's the meaning of the life that he has to seek. He closes his eyes against the sensations that woke him up by the vivid imagery. That raw flood of desire and want to keep, solve and assimilate mysteries into a part of his being rises strong and runs freely in his blood. God, he's falling for her, falling hard and all he can do is hope that it won't end badly. But damn it all to hell, he is so tired to fight.
He pulls her much, much closer, his fingertips running down her arm. “Thinking about what?” He asks instead, a gentle caress against her skin.
“Um, sex.” Her eyes, full of mischief and more, searches his gaze through heavy lashes. “Sex with you, more precisely,” she adds and her left hand runs up his naked chest speculatively. She licks her lips slowly, sensually as a faintest smile lifts his lips upwards, his head still down. One of the many wonderful things about Vala is that she's not afraid of pushing him out of his boundaries.
She always steps into his personal space, into his well-guarded walls and expects him to explode with much anticipation. Daniel is almost downright paranoid to protect that personal space. So he can understand why people tend to stay away from him, why they keep tiptoeing around him. All of his life, he's been that unwanted child in the foster homes, the unsocial genius geek boy among the mediocre masses and he always felt this alienation before...before Sha're.
Daniel sometimes thinks about why he always felt so at home among the Abdydosian. They were good people but they weren't anything like that Daniel would have thought himself to be. But he did. He really did see himself as one of them. Those people weren't well-educated like him, not in the sophisticated type any ways. He was used to dealing with reluctance, most of the times they weren't even naturally smart. But despite all of their differences, despite all the bets Daniel felt like he was at home, that he had never had one before among them.
And Sha're, oh, beautiful Sha're. He couldn't have dreamed of falling someone like her in a million, million years. Daniel realizes that he should really stop thinking about these lines. Life is definitely too short, strange and has no worries about what you're thinking about. How else could he end up loving both Sha're and Vala, two women with entirely two entirely different personality, having only sharing the hell of being a host as their lone thing in common.
He loved Sha're with all of his being, but still when he had first learned about their marriage, he couldn't help but feel disgusted about it. Given over some man to fancy him, like she was some sort of play thing. Later when he began to understand their culture and Sha're better, he managed to come to understand about it and somewhat found himself in love with her. She was beautiful and genuine and even though they were opposites, it wasn't frightening, it wasn't hard to accept it. He easily came around with his feelings and found himself being content with what he had. Why did he feel this frightened of his feelings for Vala? Why can't he come to an understanding with her as well? Why did he have to fight to deny it? Why did he have to tear her down before he could gather enough courage to kiss her? Why did things work for Sha're that don't work for Vala?
Well, the answer is quite simple. Because it's not really about neither Sha're nor Vala. It's about him. He's changed. In ten years, he's changed so much. He wasn't that young man anymore; that unwanted, naïve, clueless but almost too cocky in his beliefs and stubborn in his righteousness young boy who was desperate to find his place in the world anymore. This also meant that he has to admit the reason of why Abydos felt like home to him. He was suffering from the heroic complexes in his youth as much as the next person. Being the center of attention, being seen as wise, being a person that everybody listened to, believes in that some things that he was always seeking out but had never found before.
Revelation was dreading but Daniel wasn't frightened. Because all of the reason in the world couldn't change the outcome that it hurts, loving someone hurts and being hurt that way again is unacceptable--unbearable. SO you rise your walls, a quasi reflex against a thing can hurt you more than anything in this life. But some feelings are unstoppable and love-love always finds its way inside and- and it's stupid. You put your walls up and high; you believe that you're almost untouchable behind those high walls then one day one person comes through and you begin to understand how thin they really are. They don't have to do anything really big, sometimes it's enough to see a small sleepy smile and sometimes it's not. Sometimes you have to tear every fiber of their being down before you get your smile.
Love is stupid and it frightens him more than anything and that includs even the Ori but still, what would life would mean if your heart can't be hurt anymore and...suddenly his thoughts escape him as he looks to see Vala smiling at him. She truly has one of the most stunning smiles he has ever seen on anyone.
“You really don't believe in subtlety, do you?”
Vala shakes her head with a faint smile but once she spoke her voice is low and serious. “Would you prefer that I were more subtle?”
He ponders her question for a while. Maybe this entire thing would have worked out more easily if she did kiss him first instead of assaulting his belt last night. Things would have been a lot easier and less...frustrating. But again, it wouldn't be really them. “No, I wouldn't.” Now, it wouldn't be really his Vala, would it?
Author: Gioia
Rating: PG
Summary: "Love is stupid and it frightens him more than anything and that includs even the Ori but still, what would life would mean if your heart can't be hurt anymore and...suddenly his thoughts escape him as he looks to see Vala smiling at him. She truly has one of the most stunning smiles he has ever seen on anyone."
Category: Romance
Pairings/Characters: Daniel/Vala
Spoilers: Unending
Daniel woke up to find Vala resting her head over his shoulder, gazing at him with a strange look on her face. “Hi.” He says softly, tilting his head to the side with a faint smile and watching Vala as she gave him a small, sleepy, but sincere smile. “Hi yourself.” She replies at back of her hand as she yawns a little. His hand moves to brush her wild hair off of her forehead. There must really be something about sleepy smiles and bed hair that can be only achieved by sleeping that makes you easily lower, if not completely breach your walls; even the ones that are built by so many years of desperation, longing and fear of being hurt.
When he was still at college, he knew this guy, a man-slut, moving from one girl's bed to another's in the same night. One day he heard him saying over a shot of tequila in their dorm rooms while he was trying to finish his last essay, “You know the first rule about being a Casanova?” He had asked to his rather interested friends. “The first rule after the condoms, obviously, ” he had corrected himself with a lazy smile. “Don't fall asleep in their arms or if you do drop off, don't stay until they wake up; get the hell of out of there, immediately.” He had said, gulping his shot at once, “I tell you, once you wake up to find her looking at you with those sleepy eyes and smile, it's in that moment that you're really screwed up. It's something about sleepy smiles and bad bed hair, I guess. It makes you fall for women, hard.”
Daniel in this precise moment realized just how much that hormonal jackass was right. There is really something about sleepy smiles and bed hair that make your brick walls come down one by one and makes your heart flutter in a manner that's completely inappropriate for a grown man. That's crazy talk, Daniel knows. His walls have been constantly, sometimes gently, sometimes fiercely, breaking down since the first time she had set foot through the gate and the last three months have been just the cherry on the top of cream. He pulls her closer his body, breathing in her faint sweaty, sex-smelling scent inside his nostrils. “Whatcha doing?” His voice comes out a raspy whisper.
Vala shrugs, her hair tossing wildly and rests her hands under his chin. “Just thinking.” Her smile is still stunning. Not just one of her these big, cocky, all teeth ones. One part of him, possibly the most logical part of him screams, Talk, you need to talk. Don't fall for smiles, you idiot. but he finds it's easier not to care about that pesky voice after all tension that had built between them unraveled, leaving its place a blissful, glowing land of afterglow. And they believe that men couldn't live in afterglow.
He rubs his nose against her skin at the same thinking that the only thing that lacks from the novelty of their night-after, is the sunlight skimming over the Vala's naked body. Instead, her body is covered by gray-blue sheets under the artificial light of their spaceship. He wonders what she would look like naked under the bluish dim light of the Asgard database, under the meaning of life. How dimly sparkling runes shine all over her body as his tongue traces her body up and down, trying to figure out as if she's the meaning of the life that he has to seek. He closes his eyes against the sensations that woke him up by the vivid imagery. That raw flood of desire and want to keep, solve and assimilate mysteries into a part of his being rises strong and runs freely in his blood. God, he's falling for her, falling hard and all he can do is hope that it won't end badly. But damn it all to hell, he is so tired to fight.
He pulls her much, much closer, his fingertips running down her arm. “Thinking about what?” He asks instead, a gentle caress against her skin.
“Um, sex.” Her eyes, full of mischief and more, searches his gaze through heavy lashes. “Sex with you, more precisely,” she adds and her left hand runs up his naked chest speculatively. She licks her lips slowly, sensually as a faintest smile lifts his lips upwards, his head still down. One of the many wonderful things about Vala is that she's not afraid of pushing him out of his boundaries.
She always steps into his personal space, into his well-guarded walls and expects him to explode with much anticipation. Daniel is almost downright paranoid to protect that personal space. So he can understand why people tend to stay away from him, why they keep tiptoeing around him. All of his life, he's been that unwanted child in the foster homes, the unsocial genius geek boy among the mediocre masses and he always felt this alienation before...before Sha're.
Daniel sometimes thinks about why he always felt so at home among the Abdydosian. They were good people but they weren't anything like that Daniel would have thought himself to be. But he did. He really did see himself as one of them. Those people weren't well-educated like him, not in the sophisticated type any ways. He was used to dealing with reluctance, most of the times they weren't even naturally smart. But despite all of their differences, despite all the bets Daniel felt like he was at home, that he had never had one before among them.
And Sha're, oh, beautiful Sha're. He couldn't have dreamed of falling someone like her in a million, million years. Daniel realizes that he should really stop thinking about these lines. Life is definitely too short, strange and has no worries about what you're thinking about. How else could he end up loving both Sha're and Vala, two women with entirely two entirely different personality, having only sharing the hell of being a host as their lone thing in common.
He loved Sha're with all of his being, but still when he had first learned about their marriage, he couldn't help but feel disgusted about it. Given over some man to fancy him, like she was some sort of play thing. Later when he began to understand their culture and Sha're better, he managed to come to understand about it and somewhat found himself in love with her. She was beautiful and genuine and even though they were opposites, it wasn't frightening, it wasn't hard to accept it. He easily came around with his feelings and found himself being content with what he had. Why did he feel this frightened of his feelings for Vala? Why can't he come to an understanding with her as well? Why did he have to fight to deny it? Why did he have to tear her down before he could gather enough courage to kiss her? Why did things work for Sha're that don't work for Vala?
Well, the answer is quite simple. Because it's not really about neither Sha're nor Vala. It's about him. He's changed. In ten years, he's changed so much. He wasn't that young man anymore; that unwanted, naïve, clueless but almost too cocky in his beliefs and stubborn in his righteousness young boy who was desperate to find his place in the world anymore. This also meant that he has to admit the reason of why Abydos felt like home to him. He was suffering from the heroic complexes in his youth as much as the next person. Being the center of attention, being seen as wise, being a person that everybody listened to, believes in that some things that he was always seeking out but had never found before.
Revelation was dreading but Daniel wasn't frightened. Because all of the reason in the world couldn't change the outcome that it hurts, loving someone hurts and being hurt that way again is unacceptable--unbearable. SO you rise your walls, a quasi reflex against a thing can hurt you more than anything in this life. But some feelings are unstoppable and love-love always finds its way inside and- and it's stupid. You put your walls up and high; you believe that you're almost untouchable behind those high walls then one day one person comes through and you begin to understand how thin they really are. They don't have to do anything really big, sometimes it's enough to see a small sleepy smile and sometimes it's not. Sometimes you have to tear every fiber of their being down before you get your smile.
Love is stupid and it frightens him more than anything and that includs even the Ori but still, what would life would mean if your heart can't be hurt anymore and...suddenly his thoughts escape him as he looks to see Vala smiling at him. She truly has one of the most stunning smiles he has ever seen on anyone.
“You really don't believe in subtlety, do you?”
Vala shakes her head with a faint smile but once she spoke her voice is low and serious. “Would you prefer that I were more subtle?”
He ponders her question for a while. Maybe this entire thing would have worked out more easily if she did kiss him first instead of assaulting his belt last night. Things would have been a lot easier and less...frustrating. But again, it wouldn't be really them. “No, I wouldn't.” Now, it wouldn't be really his Vala, would it?