I don't think what I am feeling is quite...
... depression, but I think it's sadness and feeling down on myself. I cannot help but look over my life since September. While it has improved in the academic front, and in the softball front, it feels as if the personal/relationship front has taken a nose dive. While I know I still have my friends, and trust me, they are amazing and they all know who they are, the few things that I have lost have really brought me down.
Yes, I am talking about the thing that happened in September, and I know the thing doesn't know this is about him.
I can't help but feel as if my stupid thing with trust ruined something that was actually good. Why did it take me so long to realize that there was something good there, and why didn't I let my feelings out sooner.
We barely even talk anymore... its like you don't want to talk to me. We were friends, we talked all the time about useless stuff. I miss that. I don't want to lose that friendship, because seriously, not having it sucks.
I feel insignificant. I get enjoyment out of my life, softball is good, friends are good, but there is this hole, and it rips me inside. I just want out of this... I want to feel great... not incomplete.
I am done with this post right now.. its making me more sad, instead of being therapeutic like i thought it would.
Yes, I am talking about the thing that happened in September, and I know the thing doesn't know this is about him.
I can't help but feel as if my stupid thing with trust ruined something that was actually good. Why did it take me so long to realize that there was something good there, and why didn't I let my feelings out sooner.
We barely even talk anymore... its like you don't want to talk to me. We were friends, we talked all the time about useless stuff. I miss that. I don't want to lose that friendship, because seriously, not having it sucks.
I feel insignificant. I get enjoyment out of my life, softball is good, friends are good, but there is this hole, and it rips me inside. I just want out of this... I want to feel great... not incomplete.
I am done with this post right now.. its making me more sad, instead of being therapeutic like i thought it would.