Things are looking up ..
I GOT IN TO ACTT!!!
Actors college of theatre and television!
I start next year feb 22nd.... Its a 3 year diploma course, with the option of doing a 4th year by correspondence which will get me a BA... Im very excited!
Im just worried about money now. Weather my work will be enough .. weather Austudy will help or just be a pain in my ass. Just worried really... and scared i guess. This is what ive wanted since i left school .. what will happen after. I know i shouldnt be thinking of that yet.. but its what i do. I am trying to work on just having fun and learning as much as i can in the next 3 years.
Im back at DUSK as a causal, which is working well for now. Not being there ALL day EVERY day is doin well. Plus with all the christmas excitement and glitter shinny stuff coming in I am very happy to be there. And I havent had a shitty customer.. YET.
Im thinking on my future. Love of my life type thing. Should i cut and run.. or should i realise that what i have is great and im just too much of a romantic/ fairytale person. Do the things i want to change really matter or do i just think they do...
Will I be happy ? Will this work?
If i am having doubts about it now anyway should i just call it a day and stop trying to force it? I feel like lately im always pushing.. trying too hard.
I keep telling myself that it will be ok .. and its just how i feel right now. And that next year things will be different and things will get better. But i just dont know how much i actually believe that anymore.
Im either confused and torn.. or just plain blah about it all. Thats not right.
There are moments of hope and warm fuzzy feelings but they arent lasting as long as they used too. I always seem to be let down .. or disapointed. That could be just my fault? Am i thinkin he is something other than he really is.. and when reality shows, I'm sad because it isn't how i thought it was...
I guess from so far away it is hard to show change and feelings .. for some people.
Hmmmmm
Actors college of theatre and television!
I start next year feb 22nd.... Its a 3 year diploma course, with the option of doing a 4th year by correspondence which will get me a BA... Im very excited!
Im just worried about money now. Weather my work will be enough .. weather Austudy will help or just be a pain in my ass. Just worried really... and scared i guess. This is what ive wanted since i left school .. what will happen after. I know i shouldnt be thinking of that yet.. but its what i do. I am trying to work on just having fun and learning as much as i can in the next 3 years.
Im back at DUSK as a causal, which is working well for now. Not being there ALL day EVERY day is doin well. Plus with all the christmas excitement and glitter shinny stuff coming in I am very happy to be there. And I havent had a shitty customer.. YET.
Im thinking on my future. Love of my life type thing. Should i cut and run.. or should i realise that what i have is great and im just too much of a romantic/ fairytale person. Do the things i want to change really matter or do i just think they do...
Will I be happy ? Will this work?
If i am having doubts about it now anyway should i just call it a day and stop trying to force it? I feel like lately im always pushing.. trying too hard.
I keep telling myself that it will be ok .. and its just how i feel right now. And that next year things will be different and things will get better. But i just dont know how much i actually believe that anymore.
Im either confused and torn.. or just plain blah about it all. Thats not right.
There are moments of hope and warm fuzzy feelings but they arent lasting as long as they used too. I always seem to be let down .. or disapointed. That could be just my fault? Am i thinkin he is something other than he really is.. and when reality shows, I'm sad because it isn't how i thought it was...
I guess from so far away it is hard to show change and feelings .. for some people.
Hmmmmm