"Echoes of Always" - Luke/Mara - Chapter 17, April 23
This is the last chapter of EoA, but there is an epilogue to follow. I will probably get ansty and post it on Wednesday. I generally do not like the endings to my stories (ask jedimara77--my constant overthinking of them drives her nuts!) but I love EoA's epilogue. Thank you all for reading. It means so much to me that you've enjoyed my story!
Chapter 17
When he woke, sunlight was streaming over the bed. His bed. He sat up and realized he was in his bedroom on Coruscant. His brain struggled to catch up and he looked around him, noticing that nothing seemed out of place. It was almost as if he had gone to sleep the night before and…dreamed.
Touching his head with his fingers, he realized that didn’t seem right. It hadn’t been a dream. It couldn’t have been. Mara was so real, and her children-they were bright lights in a galaxy that needed them. The love he had felt with them had been real. He knew it had not, could not have been, a dream.
He reached into his pocket and pulled out the IDD, still so innocuous in his hand. Contemplating it for a moment, he placed it back in his safe and headed into the ‘fresher to shower. He would need to call the Council together to discuss safekeeping the IDD, but first he needed to comm-
"Ben!" he cried aloud, the longing for his son pushing to the forefront of his fuzzy mind. Turning from the ‘fresher and racing for the comm station, he dialed the frequency for Ben’s comlink. The interminably long period of waiting for the call to connect made him antsy and he paced the floor in front of the comm station, unable to sit. Finally the tone changed and Ben was there on the other line.
"Hello, Dad?"
Tears filled Luke’s eyes at the anxious sound of Ben’s voice. It had only been a week but it had been too long, too long and filled with dread at the prospect of never seeing his son again. Merely hearing Ben’s voice soothed him like a cool drink after a long walk in the Jundland Wastes. "Hi, son."
"Where have you been? I’ve tried to comm you, and even Aunt Leia didn’t know where you had gone! We felt your presence vanish… And there were rumors, Dad, of security force agents at your door, looking for something. The Council didn’t say anything about you being on a mission. What’s going on?"
So they had known he was missing. He knew it all along but had hoped that Ben wouldn’t have noticed, that he or Leia hadn’t panicked. But even as he felt bad for their worry, he couldn’t help but smile. He was talking to his son again and his heart was glad. "Ben, I can explain all of it. But, first, where are you? Are you still on Adumar or on your way back?"
"We’re heading back to Coruscant now. We have one more jump through lightspeed and we should be there tonight." Ben sounded relieved and panicked at once.
"That’s good. Listen, when you get back will you meet me on the Shadow? I’m going to request some time for us. I think…I think we need to talk. I’ve missed you, son." Luke held his breath, waiting for Ben’s answer.
"Yeah, Dad. I…think so, too. I’ll meet you there, tonight. Skywalker out."
Luke smiled again as he disconnected his end of the call. He was not going to let this gift, this second chance with his son, go. But after a second the smile dropped and his eyes narrowed. He had several things to do before he could meet up with Ben.
But first he headed back to the ‘fresher, discarding his clothing on the floor, pulling Mara’s braid of hair from his pocket. He smiled at it and thought that Mara would tell him to throw it away, that it was nothing but dead cells and old memories. But he thought of how much he had loved to stroke her soft hair, how entranced he had been with the color and texture and thought that there was still meaning in old memories. He stepped to his safe and placed the lock of hair there, a treasure he would always keep.
Back in the fresher he started his shower and turned to the mirror to inspect his chin, realizing that he needed a shave. He reached for his razor as the mirror was beginning to fog and saw something in the glass. Frowning, he rubbed at the fog with his left hand, and his heart pulsed at the sight of Mara’s wedding band there on his smallest finger… both rings gleaming against the dim light of the fresher. He brought the rings to his mouth and kissed them, thinking of the two amazing women he had loved. He lowered his hand to wipe at the mirror until he could see his chest and a huge smile spread across his face at the reddened patch of skin near his collarbone. As he had done before he reached his hand to touch it. "Mara," he breathed, watching the spot until the fog overtook the mirror again. "I’ll always miss you."
.
.
His first stop was the Temple, where the Masters’ Council greeted him warmly but with concern. A few questioned where he had been and mentioned the same rumors Ben had spoken of, but he told them he needed time to think and that he would soon call a Council meeting to discuss it, among other things. He also noted that he would be leaving again for a few short days, taking Ben with him this time. But he made sure to emphasize that he would be in constant contact and well in comm range. Then he spoke briefly with Corran, smiling as he noted the carefully kept facial hair on his friend’s face that set him apart from his other self in the alternate dimension. "Daala’s been a nexu at our door," Corran told Luke. "Insisting that you had abandoned your post and threatening to take over control." Luke nodded, having known that Daala would pull something like that. "I’m proud of the way you held strong," he told Corran, meaning the entire Order. And he was. The Order had survived yet another attempt at extinction.
And that was something that would not happen. Not on his watch.
He quickly pulled Tionne aside and asked her if his suite of rooms was still unoccupied, and if it would be okay for him and Ben to move back in-if Ben wanted to, of course. She hugged him then, tears in her eyes. "We’ve been waiting for you, Grand Master," was all she said, and he knew that it was more than all right.
He took the time to comm Leia from the Temple, soothing her anxious worries. He told her that he would see her soon, and smiled as he told her that he loved her. The smile on her own face mimicked his, and though he knew she was worried about him, he could see that she realized he had changed in some way while he was gone. He told her he would tell her about it sometime before disconnecting his call.
His last stop was on the way out of the Temple, to the suite he, Mara and Ben had lived in before her death. He walked in and flicked on the lights to the quiet, empty rooms. His eyes tracked along the walls as he remembered his life with Mara there, remembering where the furniture had sat, spots where important conversations had taken place, even the mundane everyday tasks that had once seemed to only occupy time but now in retrospect seemed precious.
Overlapping with those memories he now had a new set of remembrances. He could see the suite as the other Mara had kept it, the holos of her children on a table that had sat just outside of the kitchen and the bed in that now empty room where they had spent their last night together. Staring at the blank space, overflowing now as it was with memories, the suite didn’t seem so empty at all. The memories brought comfort, not sorrow. All at once he realized that he was still standing in an empty room wearing a huge grin on his face. Mara would laugh if she could see him now…and maybe, somehow, she could.
.
.
After leaving the Temple Luke made a quick and clandestine stop at CSF headquarters before heading to the Chief of State’s office. He went through the required security detail and was ushered right into her gleaming white office, as he knew he would be. If security agents were tracking him, as Ben said the rumor suggested, then Daala would probably want to arrest him on the spot.
"Master Skywalker," the Chief of State said, standing from her desk as he entered. "How nice of you to find me today. We’ve been looking for you. You’re a hard man to pin down. Can I interest you in a cup of caf or some sweetcakes, perhaps?"
"No, thank you," he answered, placing his hands in his robe sleeves and giving her his best serene look. "And I’m curious as to why you had such a hard time locating me. I’ve been on Coruscant this entire time, though I suspect you knew that. I suppose now you’ll call off your security force and your Mandolorians."
A tiny tick under her eye was the only indication that she had indeed been pressuring the Jedi Order and had made plans for future attacks. She was skilled in hiding her emotions, especially for a non-Force user. "My agents searched Coruscant thoroughly, Grand Master. You were nowhere to be found."
"Maybe you should employ better agents. Or maybe you should equip them with better devices."
A single red brow raised. "Is that so? Maybe with ysalamiri and nutrient frames?"
Luke didn’t let her push him. "I’m not sure the budget could handle shipping them from Myrkr. But back to me and why I’m here-it’s a funny thing, you see. I removed a potential weapon from a suspected murderer a week ago. At your order. Only, when I went to check on him, imagine my surprise to find him not listed among the prisoners."
"Marse Naelli met with an… unfortunate fate. He incited a riot and was killed during that altercation."
Luke didn’t show any reaction. Naelli had gotten in over his head, it appeared. And, with no knowledge of the working mechanics of the IDD, he was no longer needed after Daala had exercised his purpose.
"But the fact remains that the prisoner had a powerful device on his person that was entrusted to the Jedi Order. You betrayed that trust, Master Skywalker, when you absconded with the item. And in doing so, you knowingly broke the law."
He has expected this. "I broke no law, Chief. You entrusted the device to the Jedi and the Grand Master of the Order kept it in his possession. On his person. For safety reasons, of course."
Daala’s mouth tightened. "Of course. And, if I may ask, where is the device now?"
"It, too, met an…unfortunate fate," he said. "Even with all the safety precautions. I have, of course, filed a report at CSF headquarters. The device is no longer a concern to galactic safety."
It seemed that Daala realized that she had been backed into a corner. If she grew upset over the loss of the IDD she would reveal that her plan had been, all along, to lure him away with that which he wanted most in the galaxy. She knew that he knew that but wouldn’t speak the words aloud. Instead, he saw a shift in her eyes and braced himself for what would come next. He took a deep breath to hold any doubts he may have had at bay. Daala’s eye glittered as she spoke. "This proves to me what I’ve felt all along. You Jedi feel that you are above the law."
"We are not above it, we are outside of it," he corrected. "Bound by law, yes, but answerable to a larger galactic law-the Force."
"A government that is balanced should have no need of Jedi working outside of the law."
Luke’s serenity did not slip. "As I’m sure you have forgotten, the Jedi are not a part of the government’s agenda. We are separate from the state, yet our members are citizens of said state. Therefore the Jedi are not always in concert with the government, but our individual Jedi are certainly bound to the law of their star systems."
"And are they punished as such? If they step out of bounds and use weapons of mass destruction or…your Dark Side? Where is the justice when a Jedi steps out of bounds, Grand Master?" Daala suddenly looked far too smug as she sat in her seat and clasped her hands in front of her.
"They are policed by our own Order. Surely you’ve heard of our Masters’ Council? And of course charges may be brought by the acting governmental body of any star system in which an act of, as you say, mass destruction has occurred. It just happens, Madame Chief, that no charges have ever been brought."
"Interesting, that. Let me cut to the chase here," Daala said, a slight tinge of nervousness starting to bleed out from her. "I have a deal for you, Master Skywalker. I believe that the Jedi are working too far outside of the law. Your own nephew fell to the Dark Side under your watch, as have countless others. I find this to be a dereliction of your duties as Grand Master."
Luke made no gesture but simply waited for her to continue.
"I could arrest you on these charges. However, I would be willing to make the deal I mentioned-if you could, say, leave Coruscant for a period of time and find the reason your nephew fell to the Dark Side, and effectively demonstrate that it was not your direct doing that led to his fall, I would exonerate you."
"An exile," he said, a small smile playing at his lips. "Your first attempt at that didn’t work very well, did it? The thing is, our Order is rebuilding from Darth Caedus, as is this very government. I don’t believe you have the authority to arrest me on any charges unless you wish to arrest those who allowed Jacen to rise to the office you now hold, as well. I am not interested in making a deal with you, but I do wish to work with you. Peace in the galaxy has always been my goal; perhaps that’s one goal we could share?"
She didn’t answer his question, merely met his gaze coolly. "I have my eye on your Order, Master Skywalker. You are the largest threat to peace the galaxy has witnessed. Go, then, but be warned that any step your Order may make outside of the law will be prosecuted by the Galactic Alliance. Now, if you please, I have work to do."
Luke nodded. "As have I, Madame Chief," he said, turning on his heel to walk out of the door, a free man.
.
.
He got to the Shadow just as early afternoon was turning the day hot. He smiled at the ship, something that didn’t exist in the other universe he had visited. He couldn’t sense Ben’s presence onboard so he entered and checked on the ship, making sure no security agents or other officials had tried to mess with it. After finding it in working order he sat in the lounge, apprehension beginning to grow as he thought of his upcoming conversation with Ben. As the anxiety began to build in his chest he remembered Mara’s words to him. He realized that he could not let doubt hold him back, especially not when it came to his son. He gathered his frustration and released it into the Force, his serenity falling back over him comfortably.
Ben’s shining Force aura shone through the hangar and washed over Luke as the boy approached the ship. Luke held his breath and basked in the glow for a moment, Mara’s words from years ago once again echoing in his head: Love Ben with all your heart and make him the center of your world…
"I can do that, Mara," he whispered, just as the ramp began to lower.
"Dad?" Ben asked, his red hair peaking around the corner to the lounge. He stepped through, Artoo Detoo rolling in behind him. "Dad!"
For a moment it was as if all the years between them, the bad blood and pain, disappeared. Luke rushed forward and enfolded his son in his arms, realizing that the little boy he remembered so clearly was almost a man now. He remembered Mara’s son and how he had wanted to hug him, but this Ben, his Ben, he could and would hold. For as long as a teenager would allow it.
"Okay, Dad," Ben said after a beat. "It’s not like we just won the Coruscant Lottery. You can let me go."
Luke rolled his eyes, but grinned. Ben was so like his mother. "Can’t a father be happy to see his only son?"
"According to several very interesting biographies you may have more sons than just me, Dad."
"Trust me, you’re all I could handle," Luke teased, punching Ben lightly in the arm as he moved back. "I’ve just…I’ve missed you."
Ben’s eyes narrowed. "You have? Actually, something is … different about you. And it’s not physical, because you still have the same boring wardrobe and bad hair."
Luke rolled his eyes again. "We’re back together for twenty seconds and I’ve rolled my eyes more than I have in months."
"You’re funny for an old man."
"Ha. Listen, I have a lot to tell you. And I want to hear how Adumar was. But first, I want your opinion on something. How would you like to move back into our suite at the Temple?"
Ben obviously wasn’t expecting that question. "Really?"
"Really. You were right; I have changed in the last few days. And one thing I’ve realized is that we belong in the Temple and I should never have moved us out in the first place. I talked to Tionne and the rooms are ours, if we want them."
"I dunno, Dad. I mean, your apartment is so nice and cramped. I was taking a shower in there one day and nearly shook hands with the girl taking a shower in the building across the street. And you can’t beat the view of-"
"Naked girls taking showers?" Luke interjected.
Ben smirked. "Good one, old man. And yes, I will be glad to move back to the Temple."
Luke grinned. "We’ll do that right after we get back, then." Artoo beeped at the news that they were going somewhere and rolled off, presumably toward the cockpit.
"Back from where?"
"I’ll tell you in a minute, but first-I’d like us to talk," Luke said, nervousness replacing the happy relief he just had at seeing Ben. Too often he had tried to talk only to be confronted by his own shortcomings or Ben’s defensiveness. He took a deep breath and released the anxiety into the Force again, mindful of Mara’s last lesson.
Ben’s guard was up and Luke felt the boy’s mental shields tighten, but he nodded and sat on the couch that lined the wall of the lounge. Apparently the sudden loss of his father had made him a bit more docile and ready to listen. Luke didn’t like that it had taken such a cataclysmic event to bring them together, but he was willing to take the opportunity and run with it.
He sat across from Ben and wondered where to begin. He was torn about telling him exactly where he had been, not wishing to cause him any pain, or envy, at getting to spend a week with the woman who could have been his mother. But he didn’t want any secrets from Ben, not any more. He pulled the IDD from his pocket. "It all started when I arrested a man and took this device from him." He launched into a brief account of Naelli’s arrest and how the Chief of State had asked the Jedi to guard the device.
Ben stared at the device curiously. "What does it do?"
"It can transport beings into other dimensions," Luke explained. "Places a lot like our galaxy, but with minor differences."
"Alternate realities?" Ben looked somewhat skeptical but studied the device closer, accepting it from Luke’s hand.
"Yes. I used it and travelled to a parallel galaxy, Ben. And there…I met Mara."
"Mom?" Ben’s eyes were wide and suddenly the face that had looked so manly looked again like the small child Luke remembered.
"Not your mother exactly, but a parallel version of her." Luke swallowed thickly. "She helped me, Ben. While I was there. She helped me to understand that I need to move on. She helped me to understand that losing your mother didn’t have to destroy me, destroy us."
"I can’t believe you’ve been hanging out with some fake version of mom for the past week!" Ben’s eyes narrowed angrily. "You didn’t tell anyone where you were going so… so, what? You could go kr-"
Luke cut him off before he could finish. "Don’t. I know you’re angry about this, but just don’t say anything like that, Ben." His mind flashed back to Mara’s son making the same accusation. Ben, like his mother, was also a universal constant.
"So what did you do while you were there? What about you-I mean, the parallel you?" Ben’s eyes still angry but a bit of contrition seemed to leak from his strong shields. Like his mother, he often spoke too quickly.
"Mara was a widow. The parallel…me…had died when Shimrra’s amphistaph bit him."
Ben’s eyes widened. "What about me?"
"He looked just like you, your parallel version. Made the same bad jokes." Luke cleared his throat before his voice could break. "Made me miss you more than I had been."
Ben murmured something under his breath.
"What was that?"
"I said, you never seemed to miss me before," Ben said quickly, the words running together. To break the awkward moment he started fiddling with the device in his hand, trying to avoid his father’s eyes. "So if I were to turn this thing on, I could go there? I could see mom?"
"No," Luke said gently. "The device no longer works."
Ben’s shoulders hunched as he eyed the broken device. After a tense moment he looked up and handed the IDD to Luke. "She wouldn’t really be mom, anyway," he muttered.
Luke hated to hear the pain in Ben’s voice. He had so much to make up for with his son. "She wasn’t really your mother, but she thought of you first. Her first question to me was about you, and she did everything in her power to help get me home to you. But in the end, it was the Force that led me home, the Force and…love. Did you feel something in the Force last night?" He wondered if Ben had realized the role he had played in bringing him back from the other dimension.
"I felt like I touched your mind," Ben admitted. "But I was asleep and it was so hazy. Did I?"
"You helped to bring me back. So much like you did when you were born, with your mother. Our minds did merge, and you were the anchor that led me home. You’re my hero, Ben."
Ben’s face flushed red over his freckles. "Dad," he moaned. "Really?"
"Ben," Luke reached out for his son’s shoulder, "I love you. I know I have so much to make up for over the last few years. I told Mara that I had been living a half-life without your mom, but I realized that I should never have let myself sink so far into depression. I should have been living my life for you, just as your mom requested."
Ben sniffed and wiped at his nose with the back of his hand. "She did?"
Luke told him the story of how Mara had asked him to make Ben the center of his world should anything happen to her, those many years ago when he was still a toddler. "You were the love of her life, Ben," Luke finished.
"I think I had some competition there." Ben swallowed hard but still managed to smirk at his dad. "She really loved that holdout blaster she always kept in her sleeve."
Luke laughed and used his hold on Ben’s shoulder to move forward and embrace his son again. Ben accepted his hug, not pushing away as fast as he had before. But after a time he pulled back and look at his father.
"So now that we’re all hunky dory-and please kill me if I ever use the phrase ‘hunky dory’ again-where are we going? You said ‘when we come back’ earlier."
Luke discreetly wiped at his eyes and grinned. "That’s my boy. Ready for adventure."
Ben rolled his eyes. "And there’s my Dad, stalling as always. Come on, Old Man."
"Let’s go strap in and I’ll tell you." Luke gestured for Ben to head to the cockpit. He followed behind his son, putting the IDD back in his pocket. Once in the captain’s chair he put on his crash webbing and started the launch proceedings, calling for a position in the take-off queue.
"So?" Ben tapped his fingers on the armrest impatiently.
"I spoke with the Council to let them know that you and I were going to be gone a few days-"
"That kind of notice might have been helpful about a week ago, Dad."
Luke grinned. "Cute. And you’re right. But for now, we’re going to Endor." He input the coordinates while slying his eyes to gauge Ben’s reaction. He was not disappointed when shock comically flashed over his son’s face.
"Endor? The land of plush toys?"
"Ben. They are sentient creatures-"
"Who look like tiny Wookiees-"
"And we couldn’t have brought the Empire down without them."
"I think that’s just a spin the local Ewok Tourism Board came up with." Ben shook his head. "But seriously, why Endor?"
"Let’s just say I had a tip that there’s an offshoot of a religious cult there that are set on galactic domination." Luke pushed the lever to roll the Shadow toward the exit bay.
"You’ve got to be kidding me."
"Yeah, son, that’s just what I said…"