i know he doesn't love me...but I want to know why
It's Christmas day and I'm very bored, hence the reason I'm writing in my livejournal. This Christmas hasn't been bad altogether, but there have been better ones. I was slightly dissapointed because my digital camera won't be coming for another four days. Well sharing a room with my sister is weird. When I was staying in her room over Christmas break, she always made it clear I was just the guest and she could make all the rules since it was her room. But now that she's in mine, she has absoutley no respect for what I want. What really annoys me I guess is that she has a certain way she thinks everything should be done and everybody has to go by her rules or else she'll get very angry at you. For example, when I had my stuff in the bathroom she told me to get it out. I didn't want to do it right then and there so I just ignored it and then she starts yelling and THROWS it out. UGH..we'd be so much better friends if only we weren't so close all the time. She's so nitpicky!!! I ended up spending a ton of money on her gifts and she doesn't even like half of them. Whatever. But something else that has made this Christmas lower-than-par is well actually it's %100 my fault, but I lost the family camera. I took it to my friends house and I have no idea what happened to it after I took it to church. Needless to say my parents were not very happy with me. We still had another camera to take pictures with but I'm not really in good standing with my parents right now. So that put a damper on my Christmas eve, as I spent it searching for my camera EVERYWHERE. I swear that camera has dissapeared into THIN AIR.
So neway I guess I was a little harsh when talking about my sister, she can be cool most of the time and really nice because she drives me everywhere but I guess our personalities just clash sometimes especially when we're really close all the time. Yet I would rather have her close by than far away, like Charlotte...who seems to have forgotten she has a sister named Regina. The one time she called me these past six months was because she just wanted to talk to mom. At Christmas she gave me a text message that said merry Christmas. Okay thanks a lot, Charlotte I can see you care. For some reason I've just been slightly depressed recently for reasons I'm not going to write out. It makes me mad because I hate being depressed, I know it usually comes from being selfish. And what makes me really mad is because I know exactly why I'm depressed, and I know that it's the result of what I've done, and not anybody else's fault. What's worse, I hate that I'm such a little actor. I wish I could feel like the way I act. I don't think anybody really knows what's going on, and the one person who did know what was going on doesn't even care anymore or he's too busy to care as he told me the night before last. But I know that this won't last and I'll be perfectly fine because I always am. Just give me a few weeks and I'll bounce back. Then give me another couple of weeks and I'll go back to complaining in my livejournal again. Geez I'm such a girl.
So neway I guess I was a little harsh when talking about my sister, she can be cool most of the time and really nice because she drives me everywhere but I guess our personalities just clash sometimes especially when we're really close all the time. Yet I would rather have her close by than far away, like Charlotte...who seems to have forgotten she has a sister named Regina. The one time she called me these past six months was because she just wanted to talk to mom. At Christmas she gave me a text message that said merry Christmas. Okay thanks a lot, Charlotte I can see you care. For some reason I've just been slightly depressed recently for reasons I'm not going to write out. It makes me mad because I hate being depressed, I know it usually comes from being selfish. And what makes me really mad is because I know exactly why I'm depressed, and I know that it's the result of what I've done, and not anybody else's fault. What's worse, I hate that I'm such a little actor. I wish I could feel like the way I act. I don't think anybody really knows what's going on, and the one person who did know what was going on doesn't even care anymore or he's too busy to care as he told me the night before last. But I know that this won't last and I'll be perfectly fine because I always am. Just give me a few weeks and I'll bounce back. Then give me another couple of weeks and I'll go back to complaining in my livejournal again. Geez I'm such a girl.