Up All Night: Chapter Three

[gilpins_tales]

Chapter Three: Of Fire and Ice

Sleep came easily to someone who’d long perfected the art of spontaneous nap taking in the days following a full moon.

During Remus' teaching year at Hogwarts, laying his head against a pile of essays on the oak desk at lunch time could almost instantly snatch him a precious half hour's rest. The only worry was remembering to check for possible ink stains afterwards, so as to avoid striding into class with evidence of Daphne Greengrass’ unshakable resolve to refer to a Hinkypunk as a Hunkypunk written boldly across his cheek. But a part of his mind remained forever alert in case he needed to shoot upright at sudden footsteps outside his door, or be quickly aware that a train carriage had been plunged into darkness and danger was fast approaching.

He hated to admit it, but he knew this was how the wolf slept; one ear always open for approaching prey or predators. Asleep, but never quite relaxed. Always on guard.

Now though, he was as relaxed as he’d never been before in this situation, secure in the knowledge that if something were to happen Tonks would either deal with it or wake him. He was conscious only of her soft breathing close to him, of how much he liked listening to it, and how very reassuring it was to know she was there. So reassuring he allowed his mind to do exactly as it wanted, and drift through a variety of thoughts, reaching neither decisions nor conclusions because that would involve far too much effort.

Hopefully she’d get over the disappointment soon … Must make the most of this time with her … Dung was an absolute menace … Emmeline would have keeled over at the smell …“Romantic Thurlestone on a hot and steamy night” … Who’d said that? … She’d looked so beautiful under the Cloak … Something about that password wasn’t right … Oh, let someone else worry, he was busy sleeping … Why did she keep rushing out? ... Couldn’t compare to all the young wizards she must know …Really impressed with the Cushfirma spell … Softest, warmest pillow ever … Think of one of Sirius’ chat-up lines … “Do you fancy a ride on my pillion, darling?” … But he hadn’t got a motorcycle with him, had he ….

Remus felt his head slide down a little as the pillow shifted underneath him. He raised his head back up, which seemed to cause corresponding movement underneath again, and reluctantly put a sleepy hand up to pull it back into that position he’d found so comfortable.

His hand froze.

It might have been a while, but he knew without any doubt whatsoever exactly what he’d got his hand on. For one horrific moment he thought he was completely paralysed, and then several things seemed to happen at once.

“Oh, bugger,” said Tonks’ voice in his ear, as the movement underneath his head became a whole lot rockier, like a series of seismic shifts. “You’ve really got to get off me!”

Remus took her at her word. He shot upwards and sideways in a manner similar to one he’d adopt if he spotted twenty Death Eaters closing in on him. It resulted in him standing with his back pressed against the wooden planks, his arms folded defensively across his middle, and his brain completely without the slightest clue what to say or do next. Belatedly he realised he’d only missed smacking her in the chin by the merest fraction, which really would have added injury to insult.

Tonks stood up too, quite slowly, smoothing her top down and rotating her head and shoulders as though they were aching. She was watching him carefully; one hand resting lightly against her chest, which completely failed to obscure the sizeable red patch that now disfigured it.

He could just make out a curved shape which resembled an ear…

Remus felt the heat rise in his cheeks. “Tonks,” he began, thinking, hoping, and almost praying, that the one thing he could always count on her to do was to see the funny side of most situations. Except that her strained reaction to his stupid Auror jokes earlier meant he really couldn’t count on that one as being infallible tonight.

She gave him a hard stare, rubbed a shoulder meaningfully, and turned her back on him.

Oh, God. He’d never seen her face so expressionless.

“Tonks,” he said again. “I’m most dreadfully sorry.”

Her voice when it came was a little muffled, but very cold. “I can’t believe you, Remus.”

“It was the spell,” he said, anxiously, thinking how he was going to absolutely string Sirius up for failing to mention a few all-important details about it. “I had absolutely no idea where I was, or what I had my head against.”

“Great.” The reply was still muffled, her head bent down low in what seemed like mortification. Even the pink spikes seemed to droop slightly. “Thanks a bunch.”

Remus wondered wildly what she wanted from him; his ideas ranged from grovelling profusely, which could make things worse, to trying to lighten matters with a joke, which could make things very much worse, to -

Her shoulders twitched slightly. Her head sunk even lower towards her chest.

“To think I always had you down as a gentleman as well.” Her voice quavered, as though she could hardly bear to say the words. It held a faint note he tried frantically to identify. Shock? Disgust? He told himself to stop over-reacting, because this was Tonks after all; history wasn’t repeating itself, and if she could handle him being a werewolf as nothing to get too excited about, then she was hardly likely to be fazed by him snoring on her chest.

He let his eyes study her posture with a degree of calculation.

“Mum always warned me wizards were just after one thing.” The voice was so indistinct now he had to strain to hear. He could only see one slim hand, clasping the side of her waist.

He strongly suspected this was because she had the other jammed in her mouth.

Why the little…minx. He took a quick breath that was mostly relief, but also admiration of her ability to totally wind him up for a few seconds.

“I feel as if I should apologise profusely to you and your Mother,” he said calmly. “And thank you profusely as well, Nymphadora, for being so … supportive about the whole thing.”

A great snort of laughter burst from her. She swung round, quite scarlet, giggling uncontrollably at him and clutching her middle. The pink spikes bobbed up and down in enjoyment as well. He laughed too, responding to the sheer ridiculousness of the situation, but mostly to her; just as he always did and was beginning to suspect he always would.

“I d-didn’t know you c-could get c-c-cramp there,” she said hysterically. “I really h-had no idea at all. You’ve d-d-discovered a whole new medical c-condition, P-P-Professor Lupin.”

“Do you think I’ll get awarded the booby prize for it?” he asked wryly, and she collapsed again in an absolute howl of mirth, waving her hand and nodding her head at him in appreciation.

He laughed at her, watching her wipe the corner of each eye with the edge of her hand, and try and calm down.

“W-Well,” she said, her voice still shaking as she tried to bring it under control. “Well I think it’s fairly s-safe to say there’s nothing else that can happen tonight that can top this. Only you’d do such a crazy spell without trying it out first!”

“Of course,” Remus grinned at her, raising an eyebrow in innocent query, “one very interesting question is why you didn’t wake me up straight away?”

“You needed to sleep, of course. I felt sorry for you.” She said it as though it was totally obvious.

He smiled. “I don’t think I’ve ever said this before, in fact I’m sure I haven’t, but please feel free to feel sorry for me in that particular way again at any time.”

She straightened up and sobered up almost instantly, her hand falling away from her mouth. Her eyes met his. They were still rather watery but they were sparkling at him, alive with amusement and … possibly something else.

He hesitated, told himself sternly that he wasn’t going to hesitate any more and, instead, planned his next line and what she was likely to say in return. Just to make sure, he even planned the line after that. And a back-up one in case he needed to improvise, plus a spontaneous joke or two in case he needed to appear … naturally spontaneous. There was also time for an emergency get-out clause, in case it all went pear shaped, though possibly that wasn’t the best choice of words after recent events.

He took a step towards her. At exactly the same time as his feet moved, there was a sharp crack next to his right ear, and his head snapped round in alarm to see what had made it.

“What the -” Tonks started to speak, but her voice was drowned out instantly by the one that followed.

“Nymphadora Tonks!” it bellowed. “Get your good for nothing backside out of that bed or you’ll find out what losing a buttock really means!”

“Oh, bugger.” Tonks held her wand in her hand but, as she recognised the voice at the same time as he did, she let it fall loosely to her side. She stared at him, white-faced. “Remus, I think you should -”

“You horrible, lazy little Auror!” Moody’s roar reached a tone and pitch that made the whole barn reverberate and shudder under the force. “Don’t ever be late on my watch again!”

“Remus!” Tonks was sounding urgent now. “You really need to -”

There was another crack very close to his face, this time from the opposite direction. Remus started to reach reflexively for his wand as he caught a glimpse of something long, dark and fan-shaped coming at a frightening speed towards him. He tried to duck, but it anticipated the move perfectly, dodged the hand he flung up to protect himself, and slapped him very neatly and wetly across the face.

For a moment, his brain couldn’t quite assimilate - or simply refused to - the knowledge that both the smell and the sensation strongly suggested he’d just been assaulted by a rather disgusting and scaly tail.

“- move,” finished Tonks, in a whisper. “Oh, my God. Tunawhacka. It’s a bloody -”

“Fish alarm,” said Remus dryly, mopping his face. “Yes, thank you for that useful piece of information, Nymphadora, it’s always good to know these things after the event. What was it you were saying about using crazy spells without trying them out first? It seems to have slipped my mind.”

She bit her lip. They both seemed to reach a simultaneous decision to sit down on the sofa again, and he found himself regarding her from one side of it, while she looked at him with the same mixture of sheepishness or, more likely, fishiness, and caution from the other.

“I laughed at your balls-up,” she said, eventually.

“You wound me up first, though.”

“Are you winding me up now?”

“No, I’m trying to get rid of the smell.” Remus waved his wand. “The additional smell, at any rate.” He attempted to sniff the side of his face, and decided it was physically impossible.

“You’re all right,” said Tonks, helpfully. “It’s gone.” She made an involuntary movement as though she wanted to lean across and check out the truth of her words, but thought better of it, and sank back in the sofa again. “You’ve still got a mark on your cheek though.”

Remus looked pointedly for a few seconds at a certain part of her anatomy that, one way or another, he seemed to have spent a vast amount of time looking at tonight. Her own mark had faded to a dull pink, but was still visible.

Her mouth twitched again. She appeared to be getting ready to find it all extremely funny once more, and he thought it was about time she ate some humble pie here, too. Preferably before everyone roared their heads off, and agreed it was all highly amusing and jolly good fun for all the family.

Besides, his cheek still stung, and he was feeling a bit petty.

“It’s an odd sort of revenge, even for Mad-Eye. How many times were you late?”

“Only once!” Her voice and face were indignant. “I can’t believe him.”

“And why were you late?”

“It was only by two bloody minutes! Honestly, he’s getting nuttier all the time.”

“So why were you late?”

“I apologised as well, so there’s no reason to take it out on me like that.”

Remus sighed. “I seem to recall he’s taken it out on someone else. Stop avoiding the question. I’ve taught seventh year Slytherin, remember? There’s no tactic I can’t see through, and claiming demonic possession won’t do you any good either as Marcus Flint will verify.”

Tonks chewed on her bottom lip and spent a little while staring fixedly at the white house through the watch hole. Eventually, she said: “I went to get something to eat.”

“Where from? Australia?”

“No.” She gave him a glare. “I’d skipped lunch, and I knew it would be about eleven o’clock at night till I got anything. So I just nipped out to a Muggle shop.”

Remus waited. Tonks waited too, but it was an unfair contest.

She flared at him, her words coming in a slightly guilty rush. “All right, I went to a Muggle fish and chip shop!”

There was silence.

“Fish,” said Remus, thoughtfully. He considered an interesting section of wood worm and rot he’d spotted earlier in the planks for just long enough to let her stew on it. “What an odd coincidence that is.”

“Yes, fish!” Tonks ran her hand through her hair in exasperation. “I never in a million years thought - I mean, I even offered him some!”

“Did he eat it?” Remus asked, with some interest.

“No, he thought it should be tested for all known poisons first, and preferred to see if I’d keel over.” Tonks sighed and leaned forward, clasping her hands together. “Look, we’re even now, aren’t we? I’ve laughed at you, and now you can laugh at me for thinking Mad-Eye, of all people, would give me an alarm that plays pop music. I must have been deranged myself.”

Remus pulled a face. “I don’t know. I’m finding it hard to forget all that lecturing you did earlier. Let’s see, how did it go? Something about betting me lots of Galleons that this would be like a palace inside?”

“Yeah, well I don’t remember you telling me that I was an optimistic idiot at the time, or that the words ‘Dung’ and ‘lovely little pad’ are synonymous with ‘disaster’ and ‘smelly cow shed.’” She gave him a knowing look. “In fact, you were far too busy getting your knickers in a strop about Kingsley and Emmeline. What’s the matter, don’t you approve of mixing work and romance or something?”

“It’s nothing like that.” The words came out so quickly and hoarsely that he had to clear his throat and catch hold of himself. “It’s just -” he broke off, realising he would very much like to know what she thought about her own question “- do you think it can work?”

She shrugged. “I went out with someone for a while when we both started Auror Training together. It didn’t cause too many problems. I expect there was lots of gossip to start with about us, but people soon get bored, don’t they?”

“I suppose.” Remus felt sure the idea of him and Tonks as a couple would actually keep them talking for years and years. It was hardly fair to ask anyone to put up with that.

“Anyway,” Tonks yawned widely, and stretched her arms above her head, then moved her shoulders irritably. “Anyway,” she repeated and grimaced, her words speeding up notably, “I rather like thinking people are gossiping about my love life. For the right reasons, of course, as opposed to ‘Poor Tonks, can’t she get a date?’ Which is the current, rather sad state of affairs, and that’s the most stupid saying I could have used because the whole point is there’s no affair. There’s just a state.” She paused, apparently for a very deep breath. “So do you know anyone who wants to make an offer, and who doesn’t mind a girl who can sport custard yellow hair?”

Remus was so shocked at having the perfect opportunity presented to him in this fashion that he was hard put for several seconds to contain the desire to shout “Yes!” and punch the air as though he’d just caught the Snitch at some imaginary Quidditch game. An immense sense of relief flooded over him, but he reminded himself severely that the only time he had ever caught a Snitch was on the infamous occasion when James deliberately rammed into Snape’s broomstick, a free for all fight developed, and Remus and the Snitch had collided in mid-air while both were taking violent avoiding action.

It seemed sensible, therefore, to take his time, wondering whether to say he’d waited far too long for a girl who could accompany a perfect apple crumble, or whether he should just go for broke and say he’d loved to be saved by the skin of her custard.

He started to speak and then realised she was on her feet.

“You’re not going out again, are you?” She was looking straight at the door.

“No!” She swung round quickly, and glowered at him. It would have been more convincing if she hadn’t had a guilty looking flush on her cheeks at the same time.

“Are you sure you’re all right?” Merlin, he’d thought she was struggling a bit with those sandwiches. And he was responsible for her shoulder hurting, without a doubt.

“I’m fine!” She sat down again, and looked at him defiantly. Her hand crept upwards towards her shoulder once more, and then stopped when she noticed his eyes were watching the movement.

“Tonks -”

“I’ve told you I’m fine!”

Remus began to realise for the first time ever that the word ‘fine’ could easily form an impenetrable wall. No wonder Sirius was always calling on him on it. He reached in the rucksack by his feet and wondered why he hadn’t thought of this before.

Tonks was looking about her, and muttering under her breath. “I just need something to take my mind off things -”

The bar of Honeydukes’ Finest Butterscotch Melt felt reassuringly solid underneath his fingers as he registered the irritable tone in her low voice, but not the actual words. At least it seemed that this Cooling Charm had held, without a problem. It was very strange how they wouldn’t work in here …

“- and obviously you’re not going to do it for me -” She was still muttering, and massaging her shoulder.

Remus found the satsumas as well. They certainly wouldn’t help an upset stomach so he’d take them home for that well-known gourmet of fine food, Buckbeak.

“- by picking up on my less than subtle hints about love lives, and lack thereof -”

The question was how to broach the subject of her health without embarrassing her further.

“- and as you probably don’t approve of brazen hussies who ask men out -”

He suddenly realised he’d missed his chance to ask her out yet again, and it was so infuriating that this time he was hard pressed not to shout “No!” and thump something painfully. If only she’d just ask him herself, it would make life a whole lot easier. But that was really cowardly, and he must stop letting these moments pass him by as though he was completely oblivious to what was going on at the time.

“- I’m a bit stumped. In fact the only thing that would -”

She was almost certainly the sort of girl who liked to be asked. She didn’t look or act remotely shy, but he’d noticed one or two things she seemed to be surprisingly traditional about. It was very endearing and sweet.

“- stop me being really pissed off right now, is either the bass guitarist of The Weird Sister’s walking in here totally naked, or a large bar of -”

“Chocolate?” Remus held the bar out.

“- chocolate.” Tonks sighed, and then looked properly at his hand. “Bloody hell, where did that come from?”

He smiled. “I always carry some in case of a medical emergency.”

She grinned back. “I thought it was just to impress women.”

“That’s right. To impress women who are having a medical emergency. Erm,” he whipped his hand away as she reached for it, “talking of which, how are you feeling, Tonks?”

“What?” She was still looking at the chocolate, but now she raised puzzled eyes to his. “I’ve told you, I’m fine.”

He wasn’t having this any longer. He slid along the protesting sofa until he was next to her, hesitated, and then said: “Look, we know each other really well now, don’t we?”

Her face softened. “I hope so.”

“You’ve seen me at my worst, the morning after a Transformation.”

She was very still, gazing at him. “Yes, I have.” Her lips twitched. “And you’ve seen me at my worst, too. Like when you saw me safely into bed in true gentlemanly fashion that night I went out to the Abba themed hen night and came home a bit worse for wear. All I can remember about it is telling you over and over what a Super Trooper you were, and trying to get you to Voulez-vous with me.”

He grinned. “It was the unusual rendition of Dancing Queen that I will always treasure.”

She grinned too. “‘Young and sweet, only seventeen?’”

“Well I was more concerned at the time that you kept wanting me to feel the beat from your tambourine.” He cleared his throat. “Anyway, the point is, I like to think we’re very good friends, who trust each other.”

“You’re my best friend, Remus.” She said it very simply and honestly, as though it was the most obvious thing in the world, and he literally felt his heart turn over.

Oh, God…

His hand reached out automatically to take hers, and he stopped himself barely an inch away from the slim white fingers which were resting on her knee. In his mind he was back at Hogwarts, and three shadowy figures, two tall and one short, were waiting for him in the nearby trees as he emerged from the Shrieking Shack. He was recognising them with dawning horror as he blinked in the early morning sunlight, and knew there was nowhere to hide or any more lies left to tell. He was waiting for them to turn on him, and instead they all, one by one, pledged their friendship and their loyalty to him and to each other. But even that moment so long ago hadn’t meant as much to him as this one now.

He wasn’t alone.

“In that case,” he said, hoarsely, “I’m sure you can tell me when you’ve got a bad stomach.”

The beautiful eyes were looking at him. A slight wrinkle appeared in her forehead. “What?” she said.

“Your stomach. We’re colleagues, Tonks, as well as friends, and if you’re feeling rough you need to tell me so we can do something about it. If I had a problem, I know I’d tell you, and it’s obvious you’re struggling and in some degree of discomfort. I don’t expect me falling asleep on you has helped much.”

“Right.” She was nodding, thoughtfully. “Right. You’re absolutely right, I should have told you. Especially about the struggling and the discomfort.”

“So -” he started, relieved that she seemed to have taken it so well, but the words stuck in his throat as she leaned towards him, a slight smile on her lips. Her breath traced a path lightly across his jaw, the ends of the pink hair gently brushed against his cheek, and he caught a glimpse of a dark eye glinting at him briefly as she put her face next to his ear.

Her hand touched and then rested lightly on his bare arm.

“Remus.” He could see - no, feel - exactly how close her lips were to his ear. He wondered wildly if she’d consider whispering like this for the rest of the evening.

“It’s not my stomach that’s the problem.”

As her soft words belatedly registered, he started to turn his head towards her, but she gave a breathy little laugh and gripped his arm tighter to stop him moving.

“It’s my bloody bra.”

He looked at her. She shifted back a bit and grinned at him, a dimple showing in her left cheek.

“Your bra?”

“Yeah, the stupid thing’s killing me. It has been all night.”

“Why don’t you go and sort the problem out?” Remus knew he sounded slightly terse, but he felt he might laugh as hysterically as she’d done earlier if he wasn’t careful. And he had the feeling that, for all her apparent bravado, she wasn’t that far away from being embarrassed about something to do with this. He rather hoped his earlier suspicion that she’d worn it for his benefit, and not for this supposed visit to the night club, was a lot to do with it.

For his part, he was noting with wry amusement that, once again, the centre of attention was somehow back on her chest.

He just couldn’t get away from it. Not that he particularly wanted to, of course.

“Look away for a minute, I think I might have broken it earlier when I was messing around with it,” she said. He turned his head obediently as she stood up, checked there was still over an hour before the messenger was due to arrive, and then heard her say, “No, I’ve either broken the clasp, or it’s welded together. I’ll have to use magic.”

“I’ll do it,” Remus heard his own voice say. He didn’t remember it asking permission from his brain to speak. He was on his feet as well, reaching for his wand, and his brain was still lagging behind, saying hang on a minute, mate, this isn’t like you…

“Do what?” She was looking at him suspiciously.

“Sort your problem.” He pushed his hair out of his eyes, and lifted his wand. “I know -”

“A useful little spell. Yeah, I just bet you do!” She put her hands on her hips, a movement which helped him appreciate no end just what he was planning on releasing. “Did Sirius or James teach you this too? Because you’ll forgive me if I point out the last one didn’t go that brilliantly?”

“Oh, I don’t know. It did from where I was sitting.” He grinned at her, enjoying the look of surprise, and feeling so incredibly relieved now he knew what was wrong with her and that it wasn’t his fault. He knew he was showing off, and he knew he was flirting with her and, for goodness sake, wasn’t this exactly why he’d come here tonight?

He even debated telling her that this was actually a spell he’d invented long ago - which had impressed Sirius and James no end, once they’d worked out how it could be used to affect groups or even a class - but thought if he did that she’d never call him a gentleman again. And he was no longer that boy, who’d laughed so carelessly with his friends.

He thought his younger self would heartily approve of this though.

“All it does is open everything that’s metal and locked together. It was very useful for opening things with no keys, like boxes or ches-.” He continued hurriedly. “And I know it works.”

“Do you now?” She considered him for a second, her head on one side. “Oh, go on then. I’m sure this is going to be contrary in every way imaginable to the Code of Wand Use, and I should probably arrest you on the spot. But it’s not as though I’ll greatly miss it, whatever you do.”

He laughed, heard the slight nervousness in it, and flicked his wand before he could change his mind. She gasped with surprise as she felt the clasp give, and automatically put her arms across her chest. Then, in true Tonks-style, she snorted with amusement and let her laughter out.

“Don’t even bother apologising,” she said, as he started to speak, “because I won’t believe a word of it. In the immortal words of Abba, you did look young and seventeen when you did that, Professor Lupin, but sweet didn’t come into it much! But I have to say, it was both very impressive, and -” she moved her shoulders experimentally “- a relief.” She made a circular gesture with a finger at him. “Let’s pretend you’re a gentleman again for a minute while I get rid of the damn thing.”

He turned obediently and waited.

“Okay.” He turned back, and she was sat demurely on the sofa. “Now hand over that chocolate.”

“But the medical emergency no longer exists,” he said, and laughed as she Summoned the chocolate from his pocket, and broke a big piece off.

“Sorry the view’s not as exciting now,” she said indistinctly, with her mouth full, and passed the chocolate back to him.

Remus smiled. “I’ve got no complaints.”

“And as we’re now being so honest and sensible with each other,” Tonks yawned, loudly, “I think it’s only fair to say there is actually a small medical problem. I want to be awake when this messenger gets here, and not propping my lids open. No -” as he started to speak “- don’t do the noble thing, and say you’ll do it. All I’m asking for is an hour’s nap. And you to wake me at the end of it, and I don’t mean with a Tunawhacka.”

“Can I -” Remus began.

“And don’t start giving me lectures on how I should have admitted this earlier.” Tonks gave the impression she was either still chewing chocolate or trying not to grind her teeth.

“Can I -”

“Because I’m admitting it now, all right? I’m knackered. Friends shouldn’t have to worry so much about trying to impress each other, and you were big enough to admit it earlier so I should be able to as well. Now what are you trying to say?”

Remus grinned, wondering if she realised what else she’d just admitted to. “Can I lend you my shoulder?”

“Oh.” Tonks laughed, and drew her legs up on to the sofa. Without more ado, she laid her pink head on his shoulder, and he slipped his arm up and around her. She shifted around briefly and then shut her eyes.

“Comfy?” he said.

“Mmn.” One dark eye opened fractionally and glinted at him through long lashes. “You’d better wake me, Lupin.”

“I promise. I’ve got some thinking to do anyway.”

The eye had shut again. “About Kingsley and Emmeline, and how appalling it all is?”

“Tonks.” Remus squeezed her gently. “I really do wish them all the best, you know. I’d like it to work for them.”

“Good.” Her voice was pleased but drowsy. He watched as her face slowly relaxed and her breathing eventually deepened, and she snuggled into his arm with a trust and confidence that touched him in a way he didn’t think possible. He thought how watching another human being sleep was perhaps the ultimate in intimacy, even more so than sex. You couldn’t hide anything, or pretend anything. And now he didn’t have to hide anything, either, as he watched her; least of all how very much he’d like to be the only person who ever saw her like this. The only person she’d trust with her deepest thoughts and dreams.

He turned his head a fraction and brushed his lips against her hair, so lightly that he knew she couldn’t possibly feel him do so.

“I do wish them well, Tonks,” he whispered. “But I’m sure they set us up.”

*****

He woke her in the same way, almost an hour later, touching his lips to her hair and then, as she didn’t stir, brushing his fingers very gently down the side of her face and marvelling at the softness of her skin. She shifted slightly, and her pale eyelids with the faint blue veins marbling them, fluttered almost resentfully before slowly opening. The dark eyes fixed on him for a long second and he saw, with astonishment, that there was now a swirling, ever-changing kaleidoscope of tawny brown, deepest mahogany and burnished copper fragments within them, glowing in their depths.

He felt his own widening in response, even as she blinked and was suddenly fully aware of where she was, and the thick lashes swept down like a curtain to shield them. Dull colour stained her throat and spread rapidly upwards.

She abruptly sat up and half-turned away from him, rubbing her hands over her face.

He twisted his wrist and glanced casually at his watch, a man who had seen nothing unusual. A man who had a thousand questions as well, none of which he could put voice to.

“Hope I didn’t drool on you,” she said, seemingly occupied now with smoothing her hair down with one hand, and then accentuating the spikes with the other. “I talk in my sleep as well occasionally, so I’ve been told.”

“No worries,” Remus said. He straightened his arm surreptitiously, and thought it was worth every cramped and aching muscle ten times over. “I didn’t hear anything over the snoring.”

“Well you’d know all about that,” she said, her prompt reply at odds with the cautious, sideways glance she gave him through the pink hair. “I never knew what a great impersonation you did of the Hogwart’s Express at full speed till recently.”

He laughed, and after a second so did she, and the sudden tension that they were both aware of disappeared.

“Something’s happening by the way,” he said and moved to let her see for herself, as she quickly leaned forward. “I could see the light of a boat landing a few minutes ago down by the jetty, and there’s faint movement down there as though someone’s walking towards our street.”

“Good job we cast that permanent Lumos on those street lamps,” said Tonks, peering, “the visibility’s not great, even with it.”

“If we’d done it any brighter,” said Remus, frowning at the scene below, “it would have been far too obvious, and I thought this messenger was supposed to be hard to miss anyway. Though bearing in mind the complete lack of accuracy in anything Kingsley and Emmeline have promised us so far tonight, I’m not really counting on a man in a bright yellow cloak, with the words I’m A Death Eater! embroidered on the back, appearing any minute now. And, in fact …”

His voice tailed off.

“In fact,” said Tonks, after a pause, “did anyone say ‘man’ at all? Or did we just assume that one?”

They both thought back, while staring at the extremely tall woman who was making her way towards the houses at the end of the row, her head almost level with the top of the street lamps.

“Part Veela, possibly,” said Remus, looking at the long train of flaxen blonde hair, which seemed to end somewhere near her hips. “Very striking.”

“Part Giant, probably.” Tonks sniffed. “Very obvious. I bet she has terrible split ends. Probably can’t even see them from up there.”

The woman stopped in front of the third house from the end, looked around uncertainly, and then took out what seemed to be a piece of parchment. She turned the parchment sideways, then round the other way, and pushed her hair back from her face to study it.

“Oh for Merlin’s sake,” said Tonks with exasperation. “Typical Giant and typical blonde. What a great combination for a spy! Why doesn’t she do a spell so the bloody Wizarding Route Finder can give her a hand?”

Remus grinned. “Why don’t you pop down there and put an X on the door to help her out?”

“She’d probably still miss it. I bet she’s got TGIF painted on her boots.”

“TGIF?” Remus shot her a quick, bewildered look.

“Toes go in first.” Tonks shook her head in disbelief. “Yes, that’s right, dear! That’s the one! The one you’re stood right in front of! No, never mind about opening the gate, you just stride over it in that very unfeminine way, and squash all the flowers. Now knock on the flaming door, and give the secret password you probably can’t remember, so we can all get to bed at some point tonight.”

They watched as the door was swiftly opened by a small, dark figure that was only briefly glimpsed before being obliterated by the much larger one. A fairly avid discussion seemed to take place if the blonde’s animated gestures were anything to go by.

“Told you she’d never remember. Probably got more than three letters in it.”

“I think they’re working out how she’s going to get through a Muggle-sized doorway.”

“Doubled over,” Tonks said crisply, watching intently. “Oh dear, that must have hurt. Even I’ve never smashed my head and stepped on my hair at the same time.”

“Ouch.” Remus winced in agreement, as the blonde finally made it safely inside and the door closed firmly behind her.

They watched the door for a few minutes in silence, while Remus waited for Tonks to say the obvious, and then wondered if she was waiting for him.

“Well,” he cleared his throat. “That would appear to be it.”

“Yeah.” Tonks seemed intent on staring at the house, with its one light burning in the front window. Perhaps she was lost in thought, imagining how the female messenger had managed to cram herself into it.

He tried again. “So we can send the signal to Dung to come and relieve us.”

“Yeah.”

“Then I can get to bed, Primrose can have her home back, and you can get to that club of yours.”

“Yeah.” Tonks bit her lip, while still seemingly transfixed on the scene below. “About that -” she said, suddenly.

Remus, who’d got up to cast a charm to open the shutters on the window in the roof, glanced back at her. He grinned to himself. No longer blocked, the window let a small but very welcome breeze filter in, and the air inside the barn seemed much fresher for it. There was a sprinkling of dim stars in the inky black sky, along with a recently full moon which he resolutely ignored. It was so very easy to think of happy memories and murmur, “Expecto Patronum.”

He sent his Patronus in search of Dung, with a mental apology to the familiar silvery form as it sped off as he didn’t want to imagine where it might have to go, and thought about the amazing shades of brown he’d seen in her eyes when she’d first woken and looked at him.

She was stood with her back to the wooden planks as he had earlier, leaning against them, and watching him in silence. It occurred to him that she’d never questioned him about his Patronus in all the times she’d seen it - and Tonks was nothing if not curious - but it appeared she had other things on her mind just now that were taking priority.

“About the club,” she said abruptly.

“What,” he asked, innocently, “the Innuendo Night Club you mentioned back at Grimmauld?”

“Yeah.” Tonks did some more lip biting. “You see, I -”

“Has it still got that strobe lighting?” Remus didn’t look at her, but walked over to the darkest corner where the cauldrons were stacked haphazardly on top of each other, and the box that they were supposed to open when the messenger had safely arrived lay on its side propped against the wall. It was more like a medium sized suitcase.

“What?”

“Very eighties, I always think.” Remus bent down to examine the box more closely, mainly because he couldn’t keep his face straight. “Especially with that spinning silver glitter globe in the middle that keeps raining Acid Pops down on you all night.”

He heard her footsteps coming up behind him, and pretended to examine the lock. From the weight of the thing he thought he could make an educated guess as to what was inside. Kingsley and Emmeline, with Dung’s all-too willing collusion, obviously intended to help them every step of the way, and while part of him was amused, a far bigger part was worried about how Tonks would react once she realised. He was also faintly embarrassed by being the object of anyone’s match-making plans; having reasonably assumed that sort of thing had ended years ago at Hogwarts.

He turned to her. “Have you got that password?”

“Remus.”

“We need to have a chat about that actually. I’ll be very intrigued to see what yours is. If my suspicions are right -”

“Remus!”

He turned on his haunches, feeling the grin spreading across his face, and completely unable to do anything about it. She was glaring at him with her hands on her hips.

“I should hex you into next week,” she said. “I don’t suppose you’re going to explain to me how you happen to know the Innuendo Club so well?”

“Perhaps later.” He raised an eyebrow at her, and pushed his hair out of his eyes, while trying to stop himself laughing. “If you beg me. And if you’re not in too much of a hurry to rush off there, of course, and see how many wizards are wearing those lovely florescent green shirts that seem to be the prevailing fashion.”

“Let’s just open the damn box, shall we?” She looked as if she was trying to sound annoyed, but he suspected otherwise as she squatted down next to him and ducked her head so that her hair fell forward and he couldn’t see her expression. “Then you can see if you can persuade me to abandon my social plans for the rest of the evening in order to listen to one of your no doubt boring stories.”

He wished the light were better so her face wasn’t in so much shadow. “How do you rate my chances?”

“Not bad.” She was unsealing the piece of parchment she’d taken from her pocket. “If you beg me. But you’ll have to - oh, Merlin, you’ve got to be joking!”

Remus smiled. “Let me guess. Emmeline decided to be as witty as Kingsley.”

“Worse.” Tonks nodded miserably.

“It can’t be worse than his.”

“Apparently Emmeline’s just full of surprises tonight.” Remus was taken aback at the sarcasm in Tonks’ voice. She must have worked out that they’d been set up now, so was she simply annoyed at being made a fool of, or was it because he was the person they’d set her up with?

He tried to bring some levity back to proceedings. “I might die of curiosity if I don’t hear it.”

“Yeah, well, you know what they say about curiosity.” She scrunched the parchment up tightly in her fist.

“It never killed a werewolf?” he offered hopefully, and then, when she didn’t respond, added, “Have you got to read yours out slowly and clearly too?”

“There’s something at the bottom, I can’t see.” Tonks started to reach for her wand, but Remus murmured quickly under his breath, and opened his hand with a small flame burning in it.

“Show off,” Tonks said, still sounding subdued, but she straightened out the parchment and nodded. “Yep, I’ve got to say it slowly too. Because it’s just so very funny thinking of Remus and Tonks being embarrassed by silly passwords, isn’t it? I bet they’re rolling on the floor, laughing themselves stupid right now at the very thought of it all.”

“Tonks -” he started, the fire trembling slightly in his hand, but she looked straight at him, the light and shadows playing across her face, and he almost caught his breath at how young and lovely she looked.

And how forlorn…

“Older. Men. Do. It. Longer.” She emphasised the words slowly and carefully, holding his gaze, and then said crisply, “Rather a giveaway as she’s older than Kingsley. Perhaps they were running out of bright ideas at that point.”

Remus didn’t think they had somehow, in fact he’d put money he didn’t have on the fact they were only just getting into their stride, but he had more immediate concerns. The box had clicked open to reveal that it was bursting with bottles of everything a very serious and non-discerning drinker like Dung could require. There even seemed to be several pouches of tobacco thrown in for good measure, presumably in case they thought clouds of green smoke would add to the romantic atmosphere. He didn’t care about either. The flame disappeared as he closed his hand, and slammed the lid firmly down.

“Tonks.” He sat down on top of the box and looked down at her, but she was staring at the parchment.

“How bloody ridiculous.” She sat down heavily next to him, and scrunched the password up in her hand again before letting it drop to the floor between their feet.

“No, actually, it’s been proved true.” He smiled, but she didn’t respond to the feeble joke, and his heart sank. “Look, I’m sorry if this has upset you - it’s my fault.”

“How can it be your fault?” She smacked the side of the box with her hand, and the bottles inside clanked in protest. “God, I’m such a fool.”

All available words seemed to be sticking in Remus’ throat. “It is my fault,” he said, hoarsely, “I let people guess that I liked you and -”

“I wanted it to be real, Remus.” Her shadowed face turned to face him, and he could hear the anguish in her voice. “I wanted to believe they meant it. Even while I was thinking that never in a million, billion years would Kingsley fancy Emmeline, or vice versa; even then, I made myself believe it because I wanted to.”

Why?

Her words were so unexpected that, instead of asking the obvious question, it was easier to talk himself into wilfully misunderstanding the direction she was heading in, and planning how he could direct the conversation along those lines. Are you upset because we were set up? Are you embarrassed by it? Are you thinking of a way to let me down gently? All to delay the moment when he’d have to ask, because once he did he was going to change things between them for ever by stepping over the friendship line.

“You didn’t though, did you?” There was bitterness as well as anguish there now. “You didn’t believe it for a second, and I really wanted you to.”

Why?

He so nearly said it this time, but this time the darkness stopped his tongue because he couldn’t see her face. Instead, he said: “I did at first, though I was surprised because - well, Emmeline told you there was rapport between them, but I hadn’t seen any signs of it. I knew I’d been tired and I thought I might have missed it, but something didn’t seem to add up.” He smiled. “There’s no way Emmeline’s a saucy little minx, for a start. She’s at least five foot nine.”

He also thought, but didn’t add, that it had occurred to him to wonder if he’d been so busy thinking about himself and Tonks for hours on end that the entire Order could have paired off under his nose, and he’d have been completely oblivious. He’d always thought Dedalus and Hestia would make an interesting couple.

“Yeah,” said Tonks dully. “Totally obvious, wasn’t it? I knew it too, I just wanted it …”

Her voice trailed off, and she propped her elbows on her knees, and buried what looked like a very heavy head in her hands.

He couldn’t bear it, he murmured the words again, and the flame sprung to life in his hand. She turned her head slowly to look at him, and the dark eyes met his with the reflection of the flame burning within them.

Remus took a breath. It was like a sharp pain. “Why?” he said.

She didn’t hesitate. “You know why.”

“Tell me.”

There was no hesitation again, and his heart went out to her bravery, which was so much greater then his. “Because of you. Because of us. Because I thought if another Order pair, another unconventional pair got together, it would encourage you to give us a chance so we stopped this stupid pussy-footing around each other. I thought it would give you a kick up the backside.” Her lips twitched. “And me, as well.”

He swallowed. “Is that what you think we are? Unconventional?”

She shook her head. “No. I don’t really care about things like that. But that’s what you think. That’s what you think everyone else thinks, and you’re wrong.”

“Am I?”

She tilted her head back in irritation and rolled her eyes. “Remus.” To his complete amazement, she muttered a few words and then, before he realised what she was going to do, closed her hand swiftly over his with the flame between them. Her fingers threaded through his, even as he tried to momentarily withdraw them in shock at what she’d done.

“Why do you think they set us up if they don’t think we should be together?”

He tried to smile, but he couldn’t take his eyes off their clasped hands, the glow of the flame still visible, though starting to fade. He could feel the tendrils of cold growing and spreading, and knew what she’d done. How she’d matched him, just as she always did. And the sensations that were now spreading through him, causing his heart to race and his breathing to quicken, confirmed what he’d known all along, but only finally admitted to himself while she slept in his arms - that he’d spent all night hesitating about asking her for a single date because things had gone way beyond that for him a long time ago.

He wanted far, far more from her.

Was it too much to hope she could possibly want that much from him as well?

The slim fingers tightened on his, and he felt his own respond without conscious thought. The fusion of heat and cold was causing his hand to tingle, running up his arm like a wire. Her touch spoke of mystery and wonder, and he had to stop a mad impulse to pull her towards him and find out just what kind of magic this was.

He swallowed hard. “It’s not just because they’re interfering idiots who won’t mind their own business?”

“That’s only the annoying part of it.” She was watching their hands, a frowning line of concentration on her brow. He could feel a solitary drop of water starting to slowly make its way down the side of their palms.

“Tonks -”

“Don’t you think we’ve got a rapport?” The tiny glow was still on her face, making her lips look fuller and her eyes even darker.

The drop of water fell on the floor and he watched another appear.

“I think we’re close, yes.”

He saw the glint of white teeth as her lips parted, her voice much huskier than normal. “Define ‘close’ for me.”

“Well we enjoy a game of Exploding Snap together …”

He gave up resisting the impulse and stroked the palm of her hand with his thumb, feeling it tremble in response against his. Water was trickling down both their wrists now as the ice melted, and he felt the shudder go through her, at the same time as the tingling touch of her own fingers and the mixture of warmth and cold made him shudder too. He didn’t want that touch to ever leave him. He wanted to close his eyes. He wanted to pull her down next to him, not caring in the slightest about the filthy floor, and cover her mouth with his own until they were both breathless.

Define close…

He thought about saying what he really thought it meant. What he really wanted. Her body arching with pleasure against his. Tasting the soft warmth of her skin. Tangling his fingers in her hair. Licking the hollow between her breasts where he’d seen the sweat run earlier. Hearing her moan his name against his ear.

“Tonks,” he said, with sudden urgency.

“Mmm?” The flame had long extinguished, but he thought the gaze she turned on him was hazy and unfocused.

“I don’t think I’ve got my timing right all night, but -”

“There’s no time like now time,” said Tonks vaguely, her hand clasping his fiercely. “So you were saying?”

There was a crash above them as something seemingly collided with the roof, and then clattered noisily into the shutters of the window. They shot apart and leapt to their feet as a large grey shape half-fell, half-flew into the barn, turned in a small and dizzying circle, and finally flopped in a heap at their feet.

“Lumos!” Tonks said, her wand out-stretched, and they gazed in silence at the large owl breathing heavily on the floor in front of them with its feet in the air. A message was clamped between one quivering foot.

“Bollocks,” said Tonks, after a long pause, where the only sound to be heard was that of the panting bird.

“Yes, it is rather.” Remus nodded politely in agreement, and clenched his fist till the nails dug into his palm as the final drops of water ran through his fingers.

( Chapter Four )