I have stuff to say, and this seems like the best of available venues for it.
Forget about the roses and chocolate and sex of Valentine's Day for a minute. I wanna talk about other sorts of love.
So, Jesus more or less said, "Love your neighbor as you love yourself." Plenty of other religious leaders have said the same thing, but I'm from a Catholic background, so I'm coming to it from this direction.
It's a tall order. Humans are selfish, emotionally and socially spiky assholes. Most of us have better sides and redeeming qualities, but there's no refuting the presence of the inner asshole in us all.
I've been dealing with a lot of pain, a lot of fear, and a lot of stress lately, and let me tell you: pain/fear/stress work just as well as the Deadly Sins to bring my inner asshole bobbing to the surface.
There are moments when even loving my nearest and dearest family members is impossible and I willing to bet that's a universal experience. As for neighbors... Sometimes it's to their benefit that we don't know them well. It's fairly easy to be civil to the neighbor who keeps an eye on the kids and offers you fresh-baked muffins. It's a lot harder to act in any sort of loving way towards the other neighbor -- you know the one -- who plays their awful music way too loud and way too late, who leaves junk where you trip over it, and whose habits probably attracted the pests that are now invading your home. These jerks are the folks who we're supposed to love as we love ourselves?
On this day of the Big Red Heart, when all the people who feel pain and fear and stress because they aren't in the stereotypical romantic relationship, there's a lot of potential for assholic actions out there.
So far as I know, none of us are saints. But you know? Maybe you can find the fortitude to do something good for your own soul, and offer a muffin to the jerks next door (or whatever fills the role of "muffin" and whoever fills the role of "awful neighbor" in your life). They won't appreciate it, probably, but that's not the point. The point is to rise above your inner asshole, just a little bit, just enough to exercise the "love thy neighbor" muscle.
tl:dr version: try not to be a jerk. I'm trying my best to be fond of you.
Also, dear friends who feel rotten today because you aren't in a stereotypical romantic relationship: For your sake, I say "fuck the advertisers who throw that in your face". Also, here, have a home-made virtual muffin.
Crossposted
here (
comments).