(no subject)
So I went to my aunt and uncle's for easter and apparently my grandmother said, "I hope all the girls are nurses." Um hello, nicole and I have already decided not to be. I guess that makes us worthless unlike katelynn, kelly, and ashley. She says the wrong things sometimes and it makes me feel bad. as if I don't already hate myself for being so worthless. When I was at hopkins and depressed she told me to pray to st. jude because he's the patron saint of lost causes. so i'm a lost cause. no hope for me no matter what i do.
It's true though, I'm doing nothing worth while. not even for myself. I though this is what i wanted to do, but it turns out i don't want to do it anymore. i should've been a bio major and became a vet. i'm just so bored with it all, because it's getting me no where. i would've made more had i worked full time at blakehurst. sad, but indeed true. it's like everyhthing i think i'm doing to help myslef, is just making it harder to be happy and actually male it on my own. dammit. i suck at life
It's true though, I'm doing nothing worth while. not even for myself. I though this is what i wanted to do, but it turns out i don't want to do it anymore. i should've been a bio major and became a vet. i'm just so bored with it all, because it's getting me no where. i would've made more had i worked full time at blakehurst. sad, but indeed true. it's like everyhthing i think i'm doing to help myslef, is just making it harder to be happy and actually male it on my own. dammit. i suck at life