Oct 11, 2010 12:28
Picture this:
You're on facebook, minding your own business, whatever whatever. Suddenly a friend messages you: "OMG They're coming out with a jurassic park remake!!!!11"
Um, no. No WAY! You don't believe her, so you google it. As soon as the results for "Jurassic Park remake" pop up, the very first link catches your eye. It's not an IMDB page, or even a Wikipedia page. It simply reads, "Jurassic Park: Coming Soon."
Holy crap, it's true. They're doing a remake! But when you click the link, it's not what you expect. Before you is a website for something that looks like it's for Jurassic Park--a real Jurassic Park. It's a website that explains dinosaurs have been cloned and are living peacefully in an island near Costa Rica, soon to be opened to the public for educational purposes. This site has everything; pictures of the cafeteria, science area, lobby, museum area, and not one hint that it's a promo ad for a movie. There's even a virtual tour guide, which you don't hesitate to click.
The video is awesome. It takes you through the island compounds, leading you though the museum and onto a virtual tour of the dinosaurs. You pass broncheosaruses, stegasauruses, triceratops, all peacefully munching on leaves as you pass. This is amazing, you can't help but think. This is the most well-thought-out promo for any movie i've--
--And then the video flickers.
It happened for just an instant, but as the tour continues onto the Dilophosaurus, you're sure you saw it.
Yes! There is is again, definitely, the screen flickers, fizzes, fades out. For a second you panic; did your computer get a virus? No, it couldn't have. Suddenly a face that resembles Newman pops up on the screen, shaking a finger and repeating in a high-pitched, taunting voice, "You didn't say the magic word!"
DUDE, THIS IS THE BEST THING EVER! You're about to close the window and reblog the link for everyone to see, but just as you approach the screen once again, you're startled by a large roar as the sharp, unnerving jaws of a t-rex fill up your screen, causing you to jump out of your seat. The dinosaur slashes the screen one, twice, four times before the image stills and your try to catch your breath.
The claw marks on the screen left tears in the shape of a J and P, the words "Coming Soon" slowly fade into view.
Dude. DUDE. This remake is going to be awesome.