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its almost six in the morning and that monica is sleeping on my bed. im kinda tired but i want to the see the sunrise, even if it is by myself. jakub and andy left an hour ago but it seems like they've been gone for an eternity.so yeah 2nite was pretty fun. scott came over and it was nice to actually get some alone time wiht him even if nothign did happen. it felt good just to be held and feel wanted. so yeah, matt rode his dirt bike to my house lol, shows we truly are in ths sticks lol well i decided i dont want to wear my brace nemore so im not but i need to leartn how to walk with ym right foot b/c yeah idk lol. my ankle started to hurt so i took this pain killer and its just like being high lol but i was tripin to it was weird lol. well i went in my basement to clean and just think and i figured itd be safe leaving andy jakub adn monica up stairs or where ever lol or so i thought. i fell asleep in my basement and andy came and woke me up and i then my fone started to ring and i opned it and guess what i found, it was loaded with grated cheese or soemthign idk i was to messed up from that pill to tell. so now my fone smells like shit lol but its ok it made me laugh. so i layed on the couch in my living room talkin to matt and scott till like 4:15. andy came down b/c he got bored with monica and jakub sleeping. andy your so great thnx for be4ing there you rock n i love ya. so yeah then me and andy went upstairs and he joined jakub and monica on the bed. yeah and now im here at 6:06 in the morning b/c that nerd monica lol jk is sleeping. so yeah i havent slept in 24 hrs and im going strong, im not sure what the plan is for today yet tho. i think me n monica are posed to go to scotts b/c he wants me to meet his mom. gee wiz my tummy sure does hurt n im not to positive why, its makin all these weird noises n shit lol. anyways im freezing my buns off b/c im to lazy to get up and get a blanket lol. ive had time to think about alot and with some guidance ive realised no1 can make my life happy besides myself and i should be happy no matter what people think, b/c if u care about me you stand behind me. Starting now my new coping meconism(sp?) is doing push ups which means no more crying or hurting myself. those are signs of weakness and no1 wants to be around weak pussy ass bitches so ive got to change b/c its for the best. so has ne1 seen monty python search for the holy grail? the horse thing with the coconuts is hysterical. but what was this person on who made it b/c no1 in their right mind would make such a strange movie lol yeah so im felling really light headed but i dont wanna go to sleep b/c the sunrises in like an hour. ahhhhhhh! that reminds me, we are getting a present for waldo lol. the lack of sleep from this whole week is kicking in and i thnk it needs to go away lol. ok so i was talking to this kid today and he was like "w8" and i felt so retarded b/c i didnt know that that meant wait b/c yeah i was being slow lol ok well im done here b/c this entry has gone in like a thousand diffeent directions lol so im gonna end it here. peace out one and all~shelby xoxo