New Year's resolution AKA the yearly unrealistic to-do list
I don't know if you guys have noticed this, but it is no longer year 2005. That means everyone must welcome the new year with resolutions. I usually don't even try to participate in this, but this year I decided I would. I like to have goals and I like to procrastinate, so giving myself a year to acheive these goals sounded pretty good to me. And I know you want to know what my New Year's resolutions are. So here they are:
* To not start smoking so I don't have to make another resolution to quit.
* To win an Arby's sandwhich eating/Red Diamond Sweet Tea drinking contest.
* To master the Hadoken.
* To grow a beard. But not just any ol' beard. I need a huge, giant, furry, sexy, old-wizard-wise-man-father-time-Santa Claus-big-enough-for-birds-to-live-in-like-on-that-one-episode-of-Family Guy-2/3rds-of-ZZ Top-big-awsome beard.
* To become a productive member of society.
* ...meh, maybe next year.
* Finish my time machine.
* To pull several awesome pranks, preferably involving busy public places and wild animals.
* And to simply rule the world.
I think that all will be reachable goals. I know that my resolutions are better than the average "lose weight" or "find a better job" or "stop crying myself to sleep every night because no one understands me", but don't worry about that. Keep the resoultions you may have, they don't have to be as awesome as mine. You can always wait until next year to try to master the Hadoken.
* To not start smoking so I don't have to make another resolution to quit.
* To win an Arby's sandwhich eating/Red Diamond Sweet Tea drinking contest.
* To master the Hadoken.
* To grow a beard. But not just any ol' beard. I need a huge, giant, furry, sexy, old-wizard-wise-man-father-time-Santa Claus-big-enough-for-birds-to-live-in-like-on-that-one-episode-of-Family Guy-2/3rds-of-ZZ Top-big-awsome beard.
* To become a productive member of society.
* ...meh, maybe next year.
* Finish my time machine.
* To pull several awesome pranks, preferably involving busy public places and wild animals.
* And to simply rule the world.
I think that all will be reachable goals. I know that my resolutions are better than the average "lose weight" or "find a better job" or "stop crying myself to sleep every night because no one understands me", but don't worry about that. Keep the resoultions you may have, they don't have to be as awesome as mine. You can always wait until next year to try to master the Hadoken.