Assuming - sometimes makes you the A** but better safe than sorry and personal stuff
So, I guess I assumed stuff by just a photo - still, we really DON'T know what was said or discussed and they way people acted made me think that certain things may happen. I can't control that. I can't control anything. It's out of my hands.
All i can do now is know that I did my due diligence and called the City to inform them that we are no longer involved in the event.
I still don't trust what will happen in the future (I'm not a psychic), but I can try my best to be a little less trusting in "friends" in this particular circuit.
In the meantime, I'm seeing a therapist. With everything that's been going on with me, I needed another person to talk about stuff to.
I have decided (which is going against my brother and hubby's views) to get an attorney to at least see if there is a will. Yeah, pop passed in November and his 3rd wife (the bitch) has yet to contact me in regards of anything. We finally just got the ashes back.
Many (many) years ago, I met Peter Fiedler (you know, Arthur's son?) and it was at a dinner and I still remember this quote from sooo many years ago "You know, everyone thinks my dad is the most wonderful man on the planet, but in reality, he was a real asshole.". At that point, I knew what he meant.
My dad was a big deal in MA for so many years. He was a Superior Court Judge and he made some decisions that impacted a lot of rules and laws. We weren't exactly close. In fact, he wasn't all that friendly with me until I had my son 14 years ago.
When he met his 3rd wife, I was still in College and pop had just kicked me out of his apartment (I think she was living there - this was o so many years ago). I was 21 or 22. He paid my first months rent (in Brookline) and said, after this you are on your own. I cried. I sobbed. I took a deep breath and told myself that crying was going to not do me any good. I wiped my tears, took a shower, got dressed and the next day I paved the streets of Brookline and Boston looking for a gig. Any gig.
I ended up with a temp gig selling "New York Times" subscriptions - you know, take a free paper and hopefully you want to get a subscription? In Boston? Yeah, that was a hard sell. However, I made it work. I yelled at the top of my lungs "FREE PAPER! FREE CROSSWORD!! BEST CROSSWORD PUZZLES!! F R E E!!" . I yelled so loud that one day a Boston Herald guy came over to me and told me to stop yelling...oops. I did manage somehow to sell 15 subscriptions in a day. My boss Irving was so proud of me. I think he cried when I told him I couldn't do this anymore. I mean, I was a young (pretty) girl in the streets of Boston (in all kinds of weather - blergh) and I got a new job indoors (I think I did reception stuff? - can't remember now).
Anyway, I was barely making ends meet and making meals with ramen noodles and Kraft Macaroni and Cheese boxes. I went to China Town in Boston to buy soap (4 for a $1). Pop asked me to come meet his new girlfriend.
So I meet this blonde (no offense to blondes) and she's insisting we go to "Whole Foods" (which at that time was the most expensive store you could go to, this was like 1989?) and she had to buy shrimp and caviar and shove it in my face....yeah...
There are so many not so good stories with her and I don't want to make this post really long (yeah, sorry about that)...but I'll end this post with what happened when pop passed.
She didn't call myself nor my brother to inform us when he passed. No. Her friend who I may have met once or twice called me on my cell phone. However, she had no issues calling my Uncle (who happens to be a lawyer). She then e mailed all of us to RSVP to my dad's services in Southie. (This was a private service only). My mother nor my father's second wife were invited.
This was a very "political" gathering of all the high honchos (Judges, Lawyers, etc.) who knew my dad and their wives.
I chatted with my brother about this whole thing and with my mother's permission and my father's second wife's permission, my brother and I will be doing another "Memorial" in his honor hopefully in May. We decided that we'll invite all those that actually knew him and invite her as well. If she doesn't want to go, that's on her. It's not like I feel that we should do this, I feel like we NEED to do this.
Pop, I think you are still around me and I can feel you and sense you sometimes. I saw in your eyes you wanted me to forgive you and I do. I don't have to deal with her that much longer and once the "funeral" and Memorial is done, I think we will be finished with dealing with her.