The Sunflower 3/3
chapter 1 chapter 2
CHAPTER 3 Blooming
Jensen peeled open his eyes carefully. He could feel the soft bedding under him and the covers pulled tightly all the way up to his nose, but it still came as a surprise when he got his blurry sight to focus and saw that he was in their bed. He shivered a little, both in confusion and cold. He didn't even remember eating dinner yesterday...
Oh.
Suddenly it all came back to him. Well, not all of it, just bits and pieces that his fevered brain could offer him. But it was more than enough to scare him.
He had taken it easy the whole day, just as he had promised Jared. But even he got bored of laying in bed reading. So he had slowly gotten up from bed. Slowly, because he was having some problems with dizziness, and started with their dinner. Everything had been going along nicely. He took his time with everything, he even sat down when doing most of the prep instead of standing at the counter as he usually did. He had tried not to think about how cold he felt and how the coughing just wouldn't go away. He hadn't wanted a stupid fever getting in the way of their romantic night together.
But then he had stepped up on the stool to get a glass. He had been completely overcome by dizziness and before he knew it, he had been falling. He had tried to catch himself with his hands, the only problem being the glass he still had been holding.
Jensen looked down at his hand, only feeling the pain now that he remembered what had happened. It was wrapped tightly with bandage and when he tried to close it into a fist it stung. There was still this deep unsettling feeling in Jensen's stomach caused by not knowing much of what had happened. He doesn't remember getting his hand wrapped. He turned over to his right side and smiled when the person he knew was going to make everything better was right there.
Jared was also awake but seemed to be lost in his own little world. He was lying on his back staring at the ceiling. Jensen stretched his left hand, the one that wasn't hurt, towards his boyfriend.
"Hi, Jay." Did his voice really sound like that? He would have cleared his throat if he knew it was going to sound like that. Though it did catch Jared's attention who quickly snapped out of his day dreaming and turned his head towards Jensen when he heard his voice.
"Hi, baby." He said gently. "You're awake! How are you feeling?" Jensen hummed contently as Jared leaned in close to kiss him on the lips once.
"Better than yesterday. Still cold though." Every fiber in his body wanted to just lie and say that he was fine. But he knew that Jared would see right through him.
Jared put his big palm on Jensen's forehead. "Yeah you still have a fever but it feels much better than yesterday." Jensen smiled, trying to show that everything was alright, before burrowing his face in the crook of Jared's neck.
He closed his eyes in anticipation when Jared spoke again.
"Jensen...what do you remember from yesterday?" Jared was stroking his back and Jensen knew he only asked because he was concerned. But he still couldn't help but to tremble a little. Jared seemed to notice. "Babe? it's okay. I'm just worried about you." Jensen nodded, his face still hidden.
"I know, I know. Um... I remember starting with the dinner-"
"Jensen..."
"I had taken it easy before that, I promise! And I felt ok in the kitchen too, just a little dizzy and cold. But then..." he trailed off again. Embarrassed. He felt his hand being lifted and relaxed a little more when he felt Jared kissing it.
"Then what, baby?" Jared pushed gently.
"Well everything was going well until I had to use the stool to get one of those nice glasses we have on top of the top cabinet. That's when I got really dizzy and I fell. I tried to catch myself with my hands and I guess the glass broke in my hand when I landed on the floor." Jensen hoped to god Jared had heard his mumbled answer because he didn't think he could say it again. No wonder Dave had hurt him all those years. He deserved it. He couldn't even take care of himself without getting hurt so it was probably for the best that someone else hurt him instead, sparing him of the humiliation. He felt warm tears gather in his eyes and he swallowed painfully and tried to be as quiet as possible.
But it was no use. Jared gently but effectively pulled Jensen back a bit so he could look at him. Jensen opened his eyes again and the tears finally spilled over when he saw the sadness written all over Jared's face.
"Jensen it's okay. It's okay I promise you. You didn't know you were that sick, that's all. It happens to all of us. It doesn't mean anything. I'm just sorry you got hurt" Jared pulled him in for a tight hug, rolling them so he lay on Jared's chest. He hiccupped and sniffled a few more times before quieting down. How could Jared just know what had him worried? How could he just know?
The quiet moment was ruined by Jared's stomach, proud mood-ruiner champion since 1982, grumbling loudly. Jensen giggled softly and it felt pretty good.
"We better do something about that." He said and looked down at Jared.
Jared smiled back at him and that felt even better. "Yeah I guess we better."
The clock was already two so it was no wonder Jared's stomach was complaining. It was not happy about missing breakfast.
When they walked into the kitchen Jensen stopped dead when he saw what was sitting in a tall glass on the kitchen table.
"You got me a sunflower" he whispered, completely stunned.
Jared looked at it as if he had forgotten about it. "Oh, yeah! I did. I remembered how much you liked the last one." He rubbed Jensen's arm and Jensen nodded quickly. Jared kissed him again. "Happy anniversary, love." Jensen kissed him back. "Happy anniversary." he whispered, trying hard not to cry again.
He remembered clearly the first time Jared had given him a sunflower. It was one their second date.
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"Oh, I have something for you before we go!" Jared pulled out something from behind his back and suddenly Jensen's sight was full of yellow and brown. Jensen laughed and pulled the flower back a little so he could see what it actually was. "A sunflower?" he tried to keep the dumb grin he knew was creeping up from showing but it was hopeless. Sunflowers were his favorite and he hadn't even told Jared that.
"Yeah" Jared answered. He smiled but he seemed nervous. "I remembered that you told me you wanted to be happy. And that you hated feeling so weak...and apparently sunflowers are supposed to represent happiness and strength." He looked at Jensen and actually flushed. "Sorry, it's kinda silly. But it made me think of you. Not because you're weak though! But because you make me happy, Jensen. Very happy" Jensen looked at him questionably. How could that possibly be. But when Jared smiled at him with that smile that just made all your worries go away, Jensen believed him. "You make me happy too."
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Jared put together some grilled cheese sandwiches for them, his one and only specialty, and Jensen loved them. He usually preferred a little healthier food, but cheese (especially in melted form), was his weakness.
Jensen had just finished his first sandwich when Jared spoke. "So, I was thinking. I know you were making that stew yesterday, which I love. But maybe we could try that delicious pasta dish that you taught me? I think I've got it now and it would be best for your hand to not put any strain on it." Jensen was about to protest until Jared mentioned his hand. It probably would be for the best if he just observed tonight. And observe he would. He told Jared as much, giving him his best strict-mom look. Jared laughed. "I know you will. And I wouldn't have it any other way."
They continued eating their lunches and somehow Jensen ended up in Jared's lap. He closed his eyes and smiled as they exchanged kisses and gentle touches.
"You know we" *kiss* "don't have any" *kiss* "flour left, right?" They kissed for a long time before Jared reluctantly pulled away. "Yeah I know...I have to go out and by some. Should probably go now if" *kiss* "I want to make it back with all the" *kiss* "traffic." Jensen made an unhappy noise and laid his head on Jared's shoulder. Jared laughed softly. "I know babe. But I'll hurry back, okay?" Jensen kissed him on the nose before pouting. "Why can't I come with you?" And then he sneezes right in Jared's face and started coughing. He barely heard Jared say "That's why" over the hacking coughs and then felt Jared's hand rub his back. When it finally stopped he was beyond exhausted. And in need of comfort. So he took advantage of the fact that his boyfriend was a great substitute for a huge teddy and slung his arms around Jared's neck and hugged him hard.
"Aww, my poor baby." Jared murmured. Jensen made an agreeing noise and didn't care that he was acting like a child, clinging to Jared like this. Then he realized that he had sneezed in Jared's face. He quickly got off Jared's lap and began the search for some paper.
"Babe where are you going?" Jensen found a roll of paper on the counter and ripped of a piece. "I sneezed in your face." He offered as explanation and began drying Jared's face off. Jared snickered behind the paper and when Jensen pulled it down Jared was looking suspiciously mischievous.
"I think we have shared enough body fluids by now to make us immune to each other's sicknesses. Jared waggled his eyebrows and Jensen just blushed before diving in for another kiss.
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Jared was delighted. No wait, Jared was overjoyed.
No.
If overjoyed and delighted had a baby. Maybe it would be able to compete with the emotion Jared was feeling. He was sitting in the car, finally having been able to leave the house. To leave Jensen. He had made sure Jensen was resting on the couch with a cup of tea, in the belief that Jared was going to the store, when he left. He had never lied to Jensen before and it made his stomach twist a little knowing he would break that now. But it was all for a good cause. It took him 15 minutes to drive to the animal shelter and in that time he called both Anna, to ask about a few things, and his and Jensen's sweet neighbor, Miss Cooper, to ask if he could borrow some flour. Because Jared had no intention to going to the store.
He parked the car and headed into the shelter. He went into one of the storage rooms where they kept the cages and beds for the animals and sure enough there was a red travel bed in the left corner just as Anna had promised. Jared picked it up along with a fleece dog bed.
The dogs went crazy as usual when Jared stepped into the room with all the animals. They all wagged their tails happily and moved up to the front of their cages, hoping to be scratched. "Sorry, guys." Jared said apologetically "I'm just here for one of you." He walked up to one of the smaller cages and bent down. "Hey, boy." Inside the cage was a border collie puppy. It was just this tiny little thing, nothing more than a fluffy black and white ball, which Anna had found a few days ago left on the shelter's porch. Jared carefully picked the puppy up and cradled it in his arms. "You wanna come home with me, huh little guy?" The pup yipped an Jared smiled happily. "Yeah I think you'd like that, wouldn't you?" He put the puppy down in the travel bed together with a stuffed tiger that doubled as a heating pad for the small dog. Before he left he packed two bowls. One for food and one for water. He already had some dog food at home which Jensen always teased him about. But Jared always told him, it could come in handy, and guess what? He was right. The dog got to ride shotgun and Jared kept a steadying hand on top of the bag the entire drive so the puppy wouldn't tumble around.
The puppies were the ones that was easiest to sell at the shelter, for obvious reasons. But the shelter had been doing really well the last couple of years and Anna and Jared had made the decision that if they found an animal that they would like for themselves, they could. Anna already had two cats and a chubby little pug and the only reason Jared and Jensen hadn't gotten a dog was simply because they couldn't agree on which kind of dog they wanted. While Jensen wanted a fluffy smaller dog that he could cuddle with, Jared wanted a dog that he could take with him when he was out running. But when he had seen the little border collie pup for the first time, he had to admit it was the cutest thing he had ever seen. And it was perfect for them. Jen would be able to raise it while it was still fluffy and little and Jared could take him out for runs when he got older since border collies are great running partners.
It wasn't until Jared pulled up at their house that the nervousness came. What if Jensen didn't like the pup? Or if he took the whole thing the wrong way? Jared had a clear reason to why he decided to bring home the pup today of all days and it could backfire. Seeing Jensen so scared as he had been yesterday had broken something deep within Jared and he never wanted to experience that again. He especially didn't want Jensen to go through that again. Hearing his boyfriend plead, with fear clear in his voice, not to be hurt, was like a direct hit to Jared's heart. And he hoped the dog could provide some safety for Jensen when Jared wasn't there. Even though it seemed like Jensen didn't remember the whole "not knowing where he was" from the previous day, Jared wasn't going to take any risks. He hadn't planned on filling Jensen in either. Him not remembering was probably a blessing in disguise. Jared hurried over to Miss Anderson's house for the flour before stepping inside.
Jensen was sleeping when Jared opened the door. He was so adorable. Before he left, Jared had thrown their huge knitted blanket over Jensen and now he almost couldn't see him under there. Jared carefully put all the things down on the floor, including the puppy that was blessedly quiet. Jared made sure that he was alright before heading over to the couch. He could see a few tufts of hair and Jensen's nose. Jared smiled as he lifted the edge of the blanket, peeking inside the nest Jensen had made for himself. Jensen sniffled and curled in on himself. Probably not too happy about some of the warmth being taken away from him. "Jeenseen" Jared sing-songed. "Wakey wakey." Jensen grunted before coughing himself awake.
"Hi, I'm back." Jensen smiled and reached for Jared. Jared helped him sit up and wrapped the blanket around his shoulder when it fell down. "Guess what?" He said trying so hard to not sound nervous 'cause that would be a wonderful way of freaking Jensen out.
"What?" Jensen said sleepily.
"I have someone here for you." Jensen looked confused, a little nervous, so Jared hurried things along.
"Wait here." Jared ran back to the hallway where the puppy was no yipping worriedly.
"It's ok little man, shh. Jared's here." He lifted the dog out of the bag and headed back to Jensen, expectant to see Jensen's reaction.
It was beautiful.
"Jay...what?" Jensen sounded very confused. But he was smiling. God, was he smiling. He reached for the puppy, almost with grabby hands like a baby would and Jared handed him the little fluff ball. Jensen lay the pup on his own chest and Jared swallowed down the tears when the puppy crawled up just under Jensen's chin where it settled down contently. Jared cleared his throat before answering. "Someone left him outside the shelter a few days ago. No one has come to look for him and I just...fell in love with him. So I took him home." He watched as Jensen petted the little body delicately. "Do you like him, Jen?" He already had a pretty good idea but he needed Jensen to tell him.
"Jay I-I love him." Jensen looked up at him with shining eyes and Jared bent forward to kiss him, being careful not to squish the little guy between them.
"Oh he doesn't have a name yet." he remembered. "You have any ideas?" Jensen looked down at the puppy. "What about Alfie?"
"Alfie...yeah I like that. It's cute." They smiled and watched the puppy sleep for a while. Jared got up from the floor and sat down next to Jensen. "Happy anniversary, babe. I love you."
"Happy anniversary, I love you too."
"Oh, I just remembered. I've got something else for you" Jared got up and ran into their bedroom before Jensen could reply. When he got back Jensen was looking at him through narrowed eyes.
"You're poker face does not exist." Jared just shrugged and handed Jensen his gift. It was a t-shirt but it was rolled up so the print didn't show. Jensen took of the red present bow and started rolling the t-shirt out. Jared knew the exact moment when Jensen saw the print. Jensen stared at the tee before his eyes snapped up to meet Jared's. To an untrained eye it would look like Jensen was pissed. But Jared could tell he was trying hard not to laugh.
"What was that you said about poker faces?" he said teasingly. Jensen calmly put the sleeping puppy down on a pillow on the floor before he launched himself at Jared. The t-shirt with the "I love gulls" printed on the front fell to the floor.
"That is not funny!" Jensen attacked Jared with tickling fingers all over his body but he was laughing none the less. "Oh I think it is!!" Jared tried to avoid squealing like a pig when Jensen's fingers found his extremely ticklish sides. They tumbled around on the sofa until Jensen was overpowered by his own weak body. He slumped down on top of Jared and sighed contently.
"Can we cook the dinner from here? I don't wanna move." he mumbled into Jared's chest. Jared laughed softly and put his arms around Jensen. "Probably would be a bad idea. Unless you want tomato sauce all over the couch." Jensen grunted his agreement before saying "I have something for you too, you know." He looked at Jared and they had their faces so close to each other their noses were touching. "You do?"
"Yeah of course I do." Jensen smiled gently.
"Weeell..where is it?" Jared played the puppy eyes card which made Jensen laugh.
"You are a big child, you know that?"
Jared rubbed their noses together. "I know. But you love it."
"I do." Jensen smiled before pulling himself up. He slowly walked towards their bedroom and Jared looked over the side of the couch, checking Alfie out. The little one was still sleeping. Hopefully he would stay asleep through the night.
Jensen came back with a small black box. He lifted Jared's hand and kissed it, just above the thumb, before he placed the box in Jared's palm.
"I hope you like it" he said shyly. Jared couldn't resist and kissed his warm cheek. "I know I will."
And he did.
Inside the box laid a beautiful cuff bracelet of stainless steel. When Jared looked closer he could see that J&J was engraved on the inside. He lifted it up with a slightly trembling hand and put it on. It fit perfectly.
"Jensen" voice thick with emotion. "This is..."
"You like it?"
"Don't ask silly questions." Jared answered with a breathy laugh and then they were once again kissing.
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The rest of the night Jared felt high on love. He made the pasta dish, with Jensen and an half awake Alfie rooting on him from the kitchen table, and it turned out pretty darn delicious. Jensen said he couldn't have done it better himself. Jared doubted that but it still made him oddly proud of himself.
Alfie slept halfway through the night but then woke up whimpering. But after Jensen lifted him up on their bed and cradled him in his arms he settled quickly.
Months past and Alfie grew bigger. He followed Jensen everywhere he went and often ended up in their bed at night. But Jared didn't mind too much. He felt much more relaxed now leaving Jensen alone and every time he looked at Jensen, he would have this glow around him and he always seemed to be smiling.
Jensen still had some nightmares and flashbacks but they were few and far apart. And the flashbacks never had the intensity of the ones he had had while sick. His hand healed and he only got a small scar from it.
They celebrated one year together and Jared bought Jensen a sunflower. When they celebrated two, he bought Jensen a sunflower and a ring.
They both cried like babies at the proposal, but Jensen said yes. He said yes and Jared was the happiest man on earth.
They would have a summer wedding. And there would be sunflowers everywhere.
CHAPTER 3 Blooming
Jensen peeled open his eyes carefully. He could feel the soft bedding under him and the covers pulled tightly all the way up to his nose, but it still came as a surprise when he got his blurry sight to focus and saw that he was in their bed. He shivered a little, both in confusion and cold. He didn't even remember eating dinner yesterday...
Oh.
Suddenly it all came back to him. Well, not all of it, just bits and pieces that his fevered brain could offer him. But it was more than enough to scare him.
He had taken it easy the whole day, just as he had promised Jared. But even he got bored of laying in bed reading. So he had slowly gotten up from bed. Slowly, because he was having some problems with dizziness, and started with their dinner. Everything had been going along nicely. He took his time with everything, he even sat down when doing most of the prep instead of standing at the counter as he usually did. He had tried not to think about how cold he felt and how the coughing just wouldn't go away. He hadn't wanted a stupid fever getting in the way of their romantic night together.
But then he had stepped up on the stool to get a glass. He had been completely overcome by dizziness and before he knew it, he had been falling. He had tried to catch himself with his hands, the only problem being the glass he still had been holding.
Jensen looked down at his hand, only feeling the pain now that he remembered what had happened. It was wrapped tightly with bandage and when he tried to close it into a fist it stung. There was still this deep unsettling feeling in Jensen's stomach caused by not knowing much of what had happened. He doesn't remember getting his hand wrapped. He turned over to his right side and smiled when the person he knew was going to make everything better was right there.
Jared was also awake but seemed to be lost in his own little world. He was lying on his back staring at the ceiling. Jensen stretched his left hand, the one that wasn't hurt, towards his boyfriend.
"Hi, Jay." Did his voice really sound like that? He would have cleared his throat if he knew it was going to sound like that. Though it did catch Jared's attention who quickly snapped out of his day dreaming and turned his head towards Jensen when he heard his voice.
"Hi, baby." He said gently. "You're awake! How are you feeling?" Jensen hummed contently as Jared leaned in close to kiss him on the lips once.
"Better than yesterday. Still cold though." Every fiber in his body wanted to just lie and say that he was fine. But he knew that Jared would see right through him.
Jared put his big palm on Jensen's forehead. "Yeah you still have a fever but it feels much better than yesterday." Jensen smiled, trying to show that everything was alright, before burrowing his face in the crook of Jared's neck.
He closed his eyes in anticipation when Jared spoke again.
"Jensen...what do you remember from yesterday?" Jared was stroking his back and Jensen knew he only asked because he was concerned. But he still couldn't help but to tremble a little. Jared seemed to notice. "Babe? it's okay. I'm just worried about you." Jensen nodded, his face still hidden.
"I know, I know. Um... I remember starting with the dinner-"
"Jensen..."
"I had taken it easy before that, I promise! And I felt ok in the kitchen too, just a little dizzy and cold. But then..." he trailed off again. Embarrassed. He felt his hand being lifted and relaxed a little more when he felt Jared kissing it.
"Then what, baby?" Jared pushed gently.
"Well everything was going well until I had to use the stool to get one of those nice glasses we have on top of the top cabinet. That's when I got really dizzy and I fell. I tried to catch myself with my hands and I guess the glass broke in my hand when I landed on the floor." Jensen hoped to god Jared had heard his mumbled answer because he didn't think he could say it again. No wonder Dave had hurt him all those years. He deserved it. He couldn't even take care of himself without getting hurt so it was probably for the best that someone else hurt him instead, sparing him of the humiliation. He felt warm tears gather in his eyes and he swallowed painfully and tried to be as quiet as possible.
But it was no use. Jared gently but effectively pulled Jensen back a bit so he could look at him. Jensen opened his eyes again and the tears finally spilled over when he saw the sadness written all over Jared's face.
"Jensen it's okay. It's okay I promise you. You didn't know you were that sick, that's all. It happens to all of us. It doesn't mean anything. I'm just sorry you got hurt" Jared pulled him in for a tight hug, rolling them so he lay on Jared's chest. He hiccupped and sniffled a few more times before quieting down. How could Jared just know what had him worried? How could he just know?
The quiet moment was ruined by Jared's stomach, proud mood-ruiner champion since 1982, grumbling loudly. Jensen giggled softly and it felt pretty good.
"We better do something about that." He said and looked down at Jared.
Jared smiled back at him and that felt even better. "Yeah I guess we better."
The clock was already two so it was no wonder Jared's stomach was complaining. It was not happy about missing breakfast.
When they walked into the kitchen Jensen stopped dead when he saw what was sitting in a tall glass on the kitchen table.
"You got me a sunflower" he whispered, completely stunned.
Jared looked at it as if he had forgotten about it. "Oh, yeah! I did. I remembered how much you liked the last one." He rubbed Jensen's arm and Jensen nodded quickly. Jared kissed him again. "Happy anniversary, love." Jensen kissed him back. "Happy anniversary." he whispered, trying hard not to cry again.
He remembered clearly the first time Jared had given him a sunflower. It was one their second date.
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"Oh, I have something for you before we go!" Jared pulled out something from behind his back and suddenly Jensen's sight was full of yellow and brown. Jensen laughed and pulled the flower back a little so he could see what it actually was. "A sunflower?" he tried to keep the dumb grin he knew was creeping up from showing but it was hopeless. Sunflowers were his favorite and he hadn't even told Jared that.
"Yeah" Jared answered. He smiled but he seemed nervous. "I remembered that you told me you wanted to be happy. And that you hated feeling so weak...and apparently sunflowers are supposed to represent happiness and strength." He looked at Jensen and actually flushed. "Sorry, it's kinda silly. But it made me think of you. Not because you're weak though! But because you make me happy, Jensen. Very happy" Jensen looked at him questionably. How could that possibly be. But when Jared smiled at him with that smile that just made all your worries go away, Jensen believed him. "You make me happy too."
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Jared put together some grilled cheese sandwiches for them, his one and only specialty, and Jensen loved them. He usually preferred a little healthier food, but cheese (especially in melted form), was his weakness.
Jensen had just finished his first sandwich when Jared spoke. "So, I was thinking. I know you were making that stew yesterday, which I love. But maybe we could try that delicious pasta dish that you taught me? I think I've got it now and it would be best for your hand to not put any strain on it." Jensen was about to protest until Jared mentioned his hand. It probably would be for the best if he just observed tonight. And observe he would. He told Jared as much, giving him his best strict-mom look. Jared laughed. "I know you will. And I wouldn't have it any other way."
They continued eating their lunches and somehow Jensen ended up in Jared's lap. He closed his eyes and smiled as they exchanged kisses and gentle touches.
"You know we" *kiss* "don't have any" *kiss* "flour left, right?" They kissed for a long time before Jared reluctantly pulled away. "Yeah I know...I have to go out and by some. Should probably go now if" *kiss* "I want to make it back with all the" *kiss* "traffic." Jensen made an unhappy noise and laid his head on Jared's shoulder. Jared laughed softly. "I know babe. But I'll hurry back, okay?" Jensen kissed him on the nose before pouting. "Why can't I come with you?" And then he sneezes right in Jared's face and started coughing. He barely heard Jared say "That's why" over the hacking coughs and then felt Jared's hand rub his back. When it finally stopped he was beyond exhausted. And in need of comfort. So he took advantage of the fact that his boyfriend was a great substitute for a huge teddy and slung his arms around Jared's neck and hugged him hard.
"Aww, my poor baby." Jared murmured. Jensen made an agreeing noise and didn't care that he was acting like a child, clinging to Jared like this. Then he realized that he had sneezed in Jared's face. He quickly got off Jared's lap and began the search for some paper.
"Babe where are you going?" Jensen found a roll of paper on the counter and ripped of a piece. "I sneezed in your face." He offered as explanation and began drying Jared's face off. Jared snickered behind the paper and when Jensen pulled it down Jared was looking suspiciously mischievous.
"I think we have shared enough body fluids by now to make us immune to each other's sicknesses. Jared waggled his eyebrows and Jensen just blushed before diving in for another kiss.
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Jared was delighted. No wait, Jared was overjoyed.
No.
If overjoyed and delighted had a baby. Maybe it would be able to compete with the emotion Jared was feeling. He was sitting in the car, finally having been able to leave the house. To leave Jensen. He had made sure Jensen was resting on the couch with a cup of tea, in the belief that Jared was going to the store, when he left. He had never lied to Jensen before and it made his stomach twist a little knowing he would break that now. But it was all for a good cause. It took him 15 minutes to drive to the animal shelter and in that time he called both Anna, to ask about a few things, and his and Jensen's sweet neighbor, Miss Cooper, to ask if he could borrow some flour. Because Jared had no intention to going to the store.
He parked the car and headed into the shelter. He went into one of the storage rooms where they kept the cages and beds for the animals and sure enough there was a red travel bed in the left corner just as Anna had promised. Jared picked it up along with a fleece dog bed.
The dogs went crazy as usual when Jared stepped into the room with all the animals. They all wagged their tails happily and moved up to the front of their cages, hoping to be scratched. "Sorry, guys." Jared said apologetically "I'm just here for one of you." He walked up to one of the smaller cages and bent down. "Hey, boy." Inside the cage was a border collie puppy. It was just this tiny little thing, nothing more than a fluffy black and white ball, which Anna had found a few days ago left on the shelter's porch. Jared carefully picked the puppy up and cradled it in his arms. "You wanna come home with me, huh little guy?" The pup yipped an Jared smiled happily. "Yeah I think you'd like that, wouldn't you?" He put the puppy down in the travel bed together with a stuffed tiger that doubled as a heating pad for the small dog. Before he left he packed two bowls. One for food and one for water. He already had some dog food at home which Jensen always teased him about. But Jared always told him, it could come in handy, and guess what? He was right. The dog got to ride shotgun and Jared kept a steadying hand on top of the bag the entire drive so the puppy wouldn't tumble around.
The puppies were the ones that was easiest to sell at the shelter, for obvious reasons. But the shelter had been doing really well the last couple of years and Anna and Jared had made the decision that if they found an animal that they would like for themselves, they could. Anna already had two cats and a chubby little pug and the only reason Jared and Jensen hadn't gotten a dog was simply because they couldn't agree on which kind of dog they wanted. While Jensen wanted a fluffy smaller dog that he could cuddle with, Jared wanted a dog that he could take with him when he was out running. But when he had seen the little border collie pup for the first time, he had to admit it was the cutest thing he had ever seen. And it was perfect for them. Jen would be able to raise it while it was still fluffy and little and Jared could take him out for runs when he got older since border collies are great running partners.
It wasn't until Jared pulled up at their house that the nervousness came. What if Jensen didn't like the pup? Or if he took the whole thing the wrong way? Jared had a clear reason to why he decided to bring home the pup today of all days and it could backfire. Seeing Jensen so scared as he had been yesterday had broken something deep within Jared and he never wanted to experience that again. He especially didn't want Jensen to go through that again. Hearing his boyfriend plead, with fear clear in his voice, not to be hurt, was like a direct hit to Jared's heart. And he hoped the dog could provide some safety for Jensen when Jared wasn't there. Even though it seemed like Jensen didn't remember the whole "not knowing where he was" from the previous day, Jared wasn't going to take any risks. He hadn't planned on filling Jensen in either. Him not remembering was probably a blessing in disguise. Jared hurried over to Miss Anderson's house for the flour before stepping inside.
Jensen was sleeping when Jared opened the door. He was so adorable. Before he left, Jared had thrown their huge knitted blanket over Jensen and now he almost couldn't see him under there. Jared carefully put all the things down on the floor, including the puppy that was blessedly quiet. Jared made sure that he was alright before heading over to the couch. He could see a few tufts of hair and Jensen's nose. Jared smiled as he lifted the edge of the blanket, peeking inside the nest Jensen had made for himself. Jensen sniffled and curled in on himself. Probably not too happy about some of the warmth being taken away from him. "Jeenseen" Jared sing-songed. "Wakey wakey." Jensen grunted before coughing himself awake.
"Hi, I'm back." Jensen smiled and reached for Jared. Jared helped him sit up and wrapped the blanket around his shoulder when it fell down. "Guess what?" He said trying so hard to not sound nervous 'cause that would be a wonderful way of freaking Jensen out.
"What?" Jensen said sleepily.
"I have someone here for you." Jensen looked confused, a little nervous, so Jared hurried things along.
"Wait here." Jared ran back to the hallway where the puppy was no yipping worriedly.
"It's ok little man, shh. Jared's here." He lifted the dog out of the bag and headed back to Jensen, expectant to see Jensen's reaction.
It was beautiful.
"Jay...what?" Jensen sounded very confused. But he was smiling. God, was he smiling. He reached for the puppy, almost with grabby hands like a baby would and Jared handed him the little fluff ball. Jensen lay the pup on his own chest and Jared swallowed down the tears when the puppy crawled up just under Jensen's chin where it settled down contently. Jared cleared his throat before answering. "Someone left him outside the shelter a few days ago. No one has come to look for him and I just...fell in love with him. So I took him home." He watched as Jensen petted the little body delicately. "Do you like him, Jen?" He already had a pretty good idea but he needed Jensen to tell him.
"Jay I-I love him." Jensen looked up at him with shining eyes and Jared bent forward to kiss him, being careful not to squish the little guy between them.
"Oh he doesn't have a name yet." he remembered. "You have any ideas?" Jensen looked down at the puppy. "What about Alfie?"
"Alfie...yeah I like that. It's cute." They smiled and watched the puppy sleep for a while. Jared got up from the floor and sat down next to Jensen. "Happy anniversary, babe. I love you."
"Happy anniversary, I love you too."
"Oh, I just remembered. I've got something else for you" Jared got up and ran into their bedroom before Jensen could reply. When he got back Jensen was looking at him through narrowed eyes.
"You're poker face does not exist." Jared just shrugged and handed Jensen his gift. It was a t-shirt but it was rolled up so the print didn't show. Jensen took of the red present bow and started rolling the t-shirt out. Jared knew the exact moment when Jensen saw the print. Jensen stared at the tee before his eyes snapped up to meet Jared's. To an untrained eye it would look like Jensen was pissed. But Jared could tell he was trying hard not to laugh.
"What was that you said about poker faces?" he said teasingly. Jensen calmly put the sleeping puppy down on a pillow on the floor before he launched himself at Jared. The t-shirt with the "I love gulls" printed on the front fell to the floor.
"That is not funny!" Jensen attacked Jared with tickling fingers all over his body but he was laughing none the less. "Oh I think it is!!" Jared tried to avoid squealing like a pig when Jensen's fingers found his extremely ticklish sides. They tumbled around on the sofa until Jensen was overpowered by his own weak body. He slumped down on top of Jared and sighed contently.
"Can we cook the dinner from here? I don't wanna move." he mumbled into Jared's chest. Jared laughed softly and put his arms around Jensen. "Probably would be a bad idea. Unless you want tomato sauce all over the couch." Jensen grunted his agreement before saying "I have something for you too, you know." He looked at Jared and they had their faces so close to each other their noses were touching. "You do?"
"Yeah of course I do." Jensen smiled gently.
"Weeell..where is it?" Jared played the puppy eyes card which made Jensen laugh.
"You are a big child, you know that?"
Jared rubbed their noses together. "I know. But you love it."
"I do." Jensen smiled before pulling himself up. He slowly walked towards their bedroom and Jared looked over the side of the couch, checking Alfie out. The little one was still sleeping. Hopefully he would stay asleep through the night.
Jensen came back with a small black box. He lifted Jared's hand and kissed it, just above the thumb, before he placed the box in Jared's palm.
"I hope you like it" he said shyly. Jared couldn't resist and kissed his warm cheek. "I know I will."
And he did.
Inside the box laid a beautiful cuff bracelet of stainless steel. When Jared looked closer he could see that J&J was engraved on the inside. He lifted it up with a slightly trembling hand and put it on. It fit perfectly.
"Jensen" voice thick with emotion. "This is..."
"You like it?"
"Don't ask silly questions." Jared answered with a breathy laugh and then they were once again kissing.
~'~'~'~~'~'~'~~'~'~'~~'~'~'~
The rest of the night Jared felt high on love. He made the pasta dish, with Jensen and an half awake Alfie rooting on him from the kitchen table, and it turned out pretty darn delicious. Jensen said he couldn't have done it better himself. Jared doubted that but it still made him oddly proud of himself.
Alfie slept halfway through the night but then woke up whimpering. But after Jensen lifted him up on their bed and cradled him in his arms he settled quickly.
Months past and Alfie grew bigger. He followed Jensen everywhere he went and often ended up in their bed at night. But Jared didn't mind too much. He felt much more relaxed now leaving Jensen alone and every time he looked at Jensen, he would have this glow around him and he always seemed to be smiling.
Jensen still had some nightmares and flashbacks but they were few and far apart. And the flashbacks never had the intensity of the ones he had had while sick. His hand healed and he only got a small scar from it.
They celebrated one year together and Jared bought Jensen a sunflower. When they celebrated two, he bought Jensen a sunflower and a ring.
They both cried like babies at the proposal, but Jensen said yes. He said yes and Jared was the happiest man on earth.
They would have a summer wedding. And there would be sunflowers everywhere.