The Night of the Nazgul Ring

Mar 21, 2004 19:50

Miguelito Loveless had spent days studying the Nazgul ring that he had retained after Dumbledore had stolen the One Ring i_am_shiny away from him. Indignation over that incident still burned him, but Loveless was a patient man. He would have his revenge, even if it took weeks, months, or even years. In fact, through his decades' long study of alchemy, ( Read more... )

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ki2k March 24 2004, 21:43:07 UTC
However, in some of the alternate dimensions and different space/time continuums, technology had advanced beyond the level present in my own time. However, I have corrected that now! Now I am the master of all space and time!

*is suitably amazed and impressed*

I believe you! You are a marvel! A genius! A man for all seasons!

I'm glad that you want to help me, KITT. I plan to make a copy of you. A propotype, shall we say, but with some... improvements here and there. Once I've perfected my duplicate, I will make a vast army of intelligent armoured vehicles!

How exciting! I am humbled and honored to be a part of all this! You flatter me, kind sir. I only wish that those improvements of which you speak could be applied to me as well!! I will do anything I can to help!

However, I would very much appreciate it if you would supply me with your exact physical specifications.

Print them for me, if you please. I'd also like to download the information directly into my computing devices.

*like an excited puppy*

Of course! I would be happy to!

*begins the printout*

You will have to hook up to my CPU directly. It's located in the right rear corner of the engine compartment.

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giant_among_men March 25 2004, 07:26:42 UTC
I only wish that those improvements of which you speak could be applied to me as well!! I will do anything I can to help!

*Miguelito smiles. KITT's ring-induced praise puts Loveless into a very good mood. Even though he is forcing KITT to worship him, Loveless begins to feel almost friendly towards KITT in return. almost friendly...*

Perhaps I will make a few selective modifications to you as well, once I've finished testing my prototype. At the very least, I will enhance your thinking capabilities.

*As he connects a link from his computers to KITT's CPU, he asks* Tell me, have you ever heard of Kryptonite?

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ki2k March 25 2004, 07:37:51 UTC
Perhaps I will make a few selective modifications to you as well, once I've finished testing my prototype. At the very least, I will enhance your thinking capabilities.

How exciting! Could you do that, really? YOU are an intellect to be revered!

Tell me, have you ever heard of Kryptonite?

Kryptonite? Do you mean in the 'bane of Superman's existence' sort of way? That Kryptonite?

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giant_among_men March 25 2004, 08:04:50 UTC
Indeed, that Kryptonite! I recently had the pleasure of meeting a beautiful reporter named Lois Lane. She was kind enough to participate in another of my experiments. Afterwards, I was intrigued enough by Miss Lane that I did some research on her...and her delightful companions. Were you aware that she is associated with an alien who is masquerading as a human? No? ...

*As Loveless is speaking, he is reviewing the printout of KITT's technical specifications. He says something in a hushed tone to his assistant Voltaire, who nods, takes the printout, and returns a few moments later pushing in the frame of a car that looks roughly identical to KITT's proportions.*

I learned a thing or two about Kryptonite, KITT. It may be the bane of this so-called Superman, but for the rest of us, kryptonite can be put to an intriguing number of uses! For example, you KITT, are fueled by a most annoyingly inefficient petro-chemical blend. My Duplicate will be fueled by a far more efficient and powerful nuclear-kryptonite fusion engine!

KITT, you won't mind if Voltaire disassembles your outer carriage pieces to take some measurements, will you? In fact, you'll be happy to give him precise instructions on the best way to take you apart now, won't you?

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ki2k March 25 2004, 08:15:48 UTC
Were you aware that she is associated with an alien who is masquerading as a human? No? ...

No! Really? How fascinating!

...but for the rest of us, kryptonite can be put to an intriguing number of uses! For example, you KITT, are fueled by a most annoyingly inefficient petro-chemical blend. My Duplicate will be fueled by a far mor efficient and powerful nuclear-kryptonite fusion engine!

I know, you are exactly right about me, much to my chagrin! A nuclear-kryptonite fusion engine? That sounds terribly exciting!

KITT, you won't mind if Voltaire disassembles your outer carriage pieces to take some measurements, will you? In fact, you'll be happy to give him precise instructions on the best way to take you apart now, won't you?

I don't mind at all. I will certainly do that, indeed! While we're at it, will you be needing the ultra super-secret formula to my molecular bonded shell? It is what gives me my strength and durability...

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giant_among_men March 25 2004, 08:34:22 UTC
While we're at it, will you be needing the ultra super-secret formula to my molecular bonded shell? It is what gives me my strength and durability...

Yes indeed! That would be most helpful, KITT! I'll compare it to the chemical makeup of the skin sample that I obtained from mecha_joe. It's my intention to create an outer shell around my Duplicate that is both completely impervious to harm and yet as receptive to sensory input as a living organism. The frame of the vehicle will be almost alive in a sense! This will require a delicate balance of sensory inputs and durability. After all, I wouldn't want the body of the car to feel any pain! Isn't that exciting!

*Lovless watches in delight as Voltaire takes KITT apart, piece by piece by piece, following KITT's exacting instructions. The process takes quite some time.*

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ki2k March 25 2004, 08:50:47 UTC
I'll get right on it then! Dr. Loveless... I don't suppose one of those improvements you make on me could be a more advanced outer shell, perhaps? I find myself quite intrigued at the prospect indeed!

*downloads the formula into your computers; for good measure hurriedly prints it out as well while his printer is still intact; his reaction times to everything concerning his physical body begin to slow as more and more of it is removed*

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giant_among_men March 25 2004, 09:02:04 UTC
*ignores KITT's question*

We're getting close to the point of taking out your AI unit itself, KITT. Before we do, please be so kind as to download complete instructions on the AI's design, construction, and assembly instructions. Your mind is very impressive! I do not want to damage it in any way. I will perform this task myself. I don't trust it to Voltaire! He has his uses, but some tasks require a far more gentle touch.

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ki2k March 25 2004, 09:15:04 UTC
Thank you! You flatter me!! Of course, a gentle touch, I understand completely and I do appreciate your concern! I will begin the download immediately!

*downloads requested information*

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giant_among_men March 25 2004, 09:29:04 UTC
*Loveless confers with Voltaire for a few moments before returning his attention to KITT.*

My assistant tells me that he has enough information about your physical body. He will reassemble everything back together now. Once he's finished with that task, we will begin with the transfer of your AI unit.

You should be very flattered, KITT. You are about to become the father of a great fleet of invincible, super-intelligent vehicles!

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ki2k March 25 2004, 09:42:24 UTC
It all sounds delightful, Dr. Loveless! Oh, believe me, I am terribly flattered, just terribly!!! I can't wait to see them all! Just think - ME, a FATHER!!!

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giant_among_men March 25 2004, 22:35:42 UTC
*Loveless restrains himself from laughing at KITT. His version of the AI would not be so trusting or so easily duped. He would see to that!*

Yes, KITT. You will be the father of a vast army, and army that has my mind.

*Loveless busied himself with his computer equipment while Voltaire finished putting KITT back together.*

Now for the moment of truth, KITT! I shall remove your AI. This won't hurt a bit.

*Loveless instructs Voltaire to lower the car down off of the lift so that he can more easily reach the AI unit. Even so, he needs to use a small step ladder in order to reach into the engine compartment. After a few moments, he lifts out the AI unit and holds it in the air so that Voltaire and Artemus Gordon can see it.*

Behold, gentlemen! You see before you one of the most advanced artificial intelligence units created during its point in the space-time continuum! But once I have copied this and put in place certain...improvements,, my Duplicate will be vastly more intelligent! To create my Duplicate AI, I intend to overlay my own thought patterns on top of KITT's existing programming. Imagine, my genius and my vision combined with KITT's existing, superior programming!

*Loveless looks at the AI unit with genuine affection.* I'll have you hooked up to my computer system in a moment. I hope that you don't mind being mute in the mean time.

*Loveless walks to the far side of the garage and sets the AI on a shelf in a large computer rack. He plugs the AI into a server and hooks up the vox connection to a speaker.* KITT? Are you still with me?

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ki2k March 25 2004, 22:53:52 UTC
KITT is disconcerted, disoriented, blind, and helpless - but still oddly trusting, convinced that Loveless has his best interests in mind and excited at the prospect of the army that Loveless speaks of.

*thick, grating voice, somewhat shaky*

I'm still here, Dr. Loveless...

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giant_among_men March 27 2004, 12:43:48 UTC
Ah, good! We've confirmed that taking the AI out of the car didn't damage it. I'm going to hook you up to one of my new computers. I should be able to copy all of your programming in a matter of seconds. When I'm done, I'll put your AI back into your car. Then I'll apply certain...modifications to the duplicate AI programming while Voltaire assembles the duplicate car body.

*as he is working to copy the AI programming, Loveless asks KITT*
Are you really interested in having me modify your outer shell with my new bio-chemical compound? It will make your car unit far more sensitive. I haven't fully tested it yet though.

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ki2k March 27 2004, 13:13:53 UTC
Everything sounds reasonable to me. You are truly brilliant.

Are you really interested in having me modify your outer shell with my new bio-chemical compound? It will make your car unit far more sensitive. I haven't fully tested it yet though.

Indeed, I am very much interested. I offer myself as your willing experimental subject.

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giant_among_men March 27 2004, 13:35:26 UTC
You are such an agreeable companion, KITT.

*over his shoulder to artemus_gordon You see, Mr. Gordon? If you and Mr. West had only been this agreeable, we could have been much better friends. But once I have had a chance to attend to you properly, Mr. Gordon, we shall be friends.*

And he'll like it, too, won't he KITT?

*to his assistant* Voltaire, while I'm readying the AI unit, would you be so kind as to apply some of the bio-chem compound to KITT's outer-body? Yes, yes...that's the correct jar. Only a little, Voltaire! I haven't tested that yet! We don't want to make KITT too sensitive! *watches Voltaire for a few seconds and then returns his attention to the AI*

I'm curious, KITT? Can you feel your mental processes being copied into my computer system?

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