(no subject)
I've had the shittest night tonight.. morning. It's nearly 2.30 and I should be in bed. I've been trying to get some more work done on this essay but i could have been sleeping the last 3 or so hours for the amount of work i've done.. I've basically just been staring at the screen :( I'm going to fail this, and the psych report i have due tomorrow, and i've only got myself to blame.
I want to go on anti-depressants. I can't keep going on like this, cutting myself when things don't work out for me, or just because i want to feel anything other than fucking pins and needles. Numbness. I can't decide whether i want to feel, or not feel at all. I thought i'd grown out of this. :(
I shake, i cry, i cut. i can't live up to the adult i'm 'supposed' to be. i'll go to bed and fantasise about offing myself now. I'm sick of this all
I want to go on anti-depressants. I can't keep going on like this, cutting myself when things don't work out for me, or just because i want to feel anything other than fucking pins and needles. Numbness. I can't decide whether i want to feel, or not feel at all. I thought i'd grown out of this. :(
I shake, i cry, i cut. i can't live up to the adult i'm 'supposed' to be. i'll go to bed and fantasise about offing myself now. I'm sick of this all