(no subject)
It's getting harder.
And harder
and harder
and harder
and harder
and harder.
I hardly talked at all today.
This is the way I like it.
No one could really grasp it anyway, trying to explain myself is such a worn-out task. It's something that you cannot describe, it's something I reach for everyday with my words, just trying so hard to slap it onto paper, give it a home, a hope of being fixed, a name. Giving myself a chance to see it, finally, whatever it is that's tormented me for years and whatever it is that will continue to do so until I finally confine it's ugly face to the ink I capture it with.
I just need a name for it.
I just need to know that things this ugly, this penetrating, this unrelenting, can still be humanized enough for names.
And harder
and harder
and harder
and harder
and harder.
I hardly talked at all today.
This is the way I like it.
No one could really grasp it anyway, trying to explain myself is such a worn-out task. It's something that you cannot describe, it's something I reach for everyday with my words, just trying so hard to slap it onto paper, give it a home, a hope of being fixed, a name. Giving myself a chance to see it, finally, whatever it is that's tormented me for years and whatever it is that will continue to do so until I finally confine it's ugly face to the ink I capture it with.
I just need a name for it.
I just need to know that things this ugly, this penetrating, this unrelenting, can still be humanized enough for names.